May 25, 2002 - Msg 7101: Sighhhhh... waiting, waiting. chew chew. mkghh. smack. Oh, here he comes! woo! (ahem) hoo hoo... HOOT!
- Hazel

May 25, 2002 - Msg 7102: SURPRISE! SURPRISE! SURPRISE! Happy Birthday to Tom from the Front Porch!

May 25, 2002 - Msg 7103: Happy Birthday Tom! be sure to read the Archive! ~ Mrs. Wiley

May 25, 2002 - Msg 7104: Hey yall back home from work. Worked 13 1/2 hours. So I am pooped! Happy Birthday again Tom. Hope you have had a good day. And I hope I aint too late for the party. Sounds like theys all keyed up about it. Well I am gonna go take a hot bath and kick back for awhile. Got tomrrow off so thats a good thing. See yall later!! Salty Dog

May 25, 2002 - Msg 7105: Hey it is me again. Where is Dixie Bell at? I was hoping for an update on Guywatch 02. Hope your headache gets better Asa. Hmmmm a little too much sweet cider last night?? SD

May 25, 2002 - Msg 7106: Goober:You should have caught the tomato like I caught the egg.
Otis: Hew threw it harder at me than he did at you.
Goober: There ain't but two kinds of cops, the quick and the dead.

Fun Girl

May 25, 2002 - Msg 7107: haha I just got thru watching that one too, Fun Girl.
Judd: I wish he'd throw something at me. I haven't had my lunch yet.
- Hazel



May 26, 2002 - Msg 7109: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, TOM! I hope you enjoyed your party. Tell us the truth now did we surprise you?
You surprised us! Hazel was busy chewin' and just barely hooted on time! Salty Dog we still have grub left and a few hangin' around the porch so come on over ifn' you're not too tired.
I'm glad you liked my dress Mrs. Wiley, thanks. Fred Goss down at the cleaners sure didn't like it though. Especially after I dropped the ice cream on it.
Sorry about your headache Asa. I hope you're feeling better. Too much ice cream can do that! ;)
Again, Tom, I hope you had a good day. You deserve the best. ((((Tom)))) from all of us at the porch. Nite all---Helen

May 26, 2002 - Msg 7110: Happy Birthday Tom! Are there any left over samitches left over? May I get of the ice cream maker, Helen? M-my b-bottom i-is c-cold. Hope ya' had a great day Tom. ((((Tom))))


May 26, 2002 - Msg 7111: Between which books did God not speak to people on earth for 400 years?

I will sing unto the Lord, because he hath dealt bountifully with me.

Psalms 13:6


May 26, 2002 - Msg 7112: Good Sabbath morning porchters. How is everyone? Hope your doing well.
Hope your birthday was a good one Tom. You have many friends here, all of them good ones. And that Helen knows how to throw a party huh?
I just got back from an early morning walk, watching the sun come up over the wasatch mountains, the early morning dew slowly starts to evaporate, the birds out doing there thing. And I just think how good God is to us. The many things he blesses us with every day, and we are just to blamed busy to enjoy them. And then good friends like you. Thank you Lord for all you have blessed us with. OK I'm done with my sermon. Just felt the need to say that. May you have a great day today and enjoy all the Lord has bestowed you.



May 26, 2002 - Msg 7113: Nice sermon, Asa. I didn't fall asleep during it either! I agree. It's a beautiful day if we'll just open our eyes to it. Look at friends and family. The trees and the clouds. God is good.
- Hazel

"Keep a Good Thought"

May 26, 2002 - Msg 7114: Asa, that's one thing you can't talk enough about...sin.

he didn't talk about sin!!"

Good Sabbath Porch - yes, He is so good to us!
~ Mrs. Wiley

May 26, 2002 - Msg 7115: Morning porch, must be something going on around here. I was up before 8 this morning. Used to I could sleep until 11 or 12 easy. What causes that?? I hope I aint getting old. I got to see my cousin yesterday. He is looking so good now. He is able to drive now. And is gaining some of his weight back. It just makes stop and think. He shouldn't even be alive now. The doctors had said it would be 6 months before he was even out of the hospital. And he made it out in 3 weeks. God is good to us. Well I am off of my soapbox for today. Gonna enjoy my day off. Going to preachin then maybe do a little fishing. But don't tell nobody. Around here, you aint supposed to fish on Sunday. Not a law or anything just the way it is. See yall later--Salty Dog

May 26, 2002 - Msg 7116: Yes, Asa, you're so right. God is indeed good to us. It just occurred to me that it was a blessing when he gave us not one, but five, physical senses. Think about it. When all those senses are working, they work together to allow us to enjoy the world around us. When one doesn't work, however, the others pick up the pace and we can still enjoy things. If a person can't see the beautiful sunshine, they can still feel its warmth on their skin. If one can't hear a bird's song, one can still watch its soaring flight and marvel at the color and variety of the singers. It's just amazing to me.
He could have dropped me into a soundless, scentless world of shades of gray, with tasteless food that would be eaten for survival only, and where the touch of a loved one's hand would mean nothing. Instead, I can hear music, see colorful flowers, smell chicken frying and enjoy eating it, and enjoy my grandson's wet little kisses and feel Sugarplum's soft fur. Blessings? Oh, yes!
Sugarplum says hey!--Romeena

May 26, 2002 - Msg 7117: Morning Porch! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TOM!! Sorry I'm late, but I did get you a card sent out on time! Hope everyone has a wonderful day, I'm gonna lay in the sun a while today & listen to the birds sing & the cows moo. Salty no fishin on Sun?? Mr. Neff would have a coniption!

May 26, 2002 - Msg 7118: Almost forgot, Hey to SugarPlum!

May 26, 2002 - Msg 7119: You are right, Asa.
Hey Mrs. Wiley, Salty, Hazel, Mavis, Helen, Romeena, SugarPlum and anybody I missed. Today is awonderful Sunday. Everyday is great.


May 26, 2002 - Msg 7120: oops. A (space) wonderful Sunday. :-)

May 26, 2002 - Msg 7121: Think I'll go over to the drug store for some icecream for later on. Anyone need anything?


May 26, 2002 - Msg 7122: Asa, I could use some foot powder and some cotton balls. Thanks dear! ~ Mrs. Wiley

May 26, 2002 - Msg 7123: Footballs and cotton powder? You got it Mrs. Wiley.:)


May 26, 2002 - Msg 7124: Could you get me some peroxide? I need it for... er, gargling.
- Hazel

May 26, 2002 - Msg 7125: You still get that in 55 gallon drums Hazel?


May 26, 2002 - Msg 7126: Happy Belated Birthday Tom. Sorry I missed it. Hope it was a good one.

For Memorial Day
In Memory of those who died fighting to keep us free,
In Memory of those who died because others tried to take our freedom away,
In honor of those who lost loved ones in the wars and in the attack on America.
In honor of those who worked rescue and recovery at the World Trade Center, The Pentegon and in Pennysylvania,
I thank you all.

Miss Ellie

May 27, 2002 - Msg 7127: Amen!--Romeena

May 27, 2002 - Msg 7128: Amen from me too Miss Ellie. Hope yall have a great holiday. I have to work for a little while then off to the races. My husbands second time out and I hope and pray that nothing goes wrong with the car. Have yall seen the thing with the new 20 dollar bill? You can see the towers burning in it. On one of the new ones. Somebody showed it to me at work the other day. It is pretty wild I tell ya. Well I am off to bed now. See yall in the morning. Nite--Salty Dog

May 27, 2002 - Msg 7129: Happy Memorial Day Mayberry! Is there going to be a parade? Perfect timing for Floyd to "strut" in the new/old Squad Car!

Amen Miss Ellie, nice memorial! Salty - NO WAY! Are you serious?? I want to see that $20. What a fabulous way to show those terrorists that we won't be intimidated - nay, we'll glorify our brave brothers and sisters and become even stronger! Remembering them on our money - how EXCELLENT!

~ Mrs. Wiley

May 27, 2002 - Msg 7130: Morning Porch.Hey Mrs. Wiley, it would be kind of hard to explain on here but I will e-mail it to ya. How is everybody doing? Hope yall are having a good day off. I have to go in for 5 hours which means I can watch up to 10 TAGS eps. hee hee I love my job. Yall have a good day. See ya later--Salty Dog

May 27, 2002 - Msg 7131: And to think I use to feel bad when Salty had to work. Now I know why she volounteers to work. What a life.:) I saw that thing with the 20 dollar bill. Unreal. I wonder who on earth finds this stuff out?
Hope everyone has a good Memorial Day, and that we remember all our fallen. Maybe we can have a picnic later when Salty gets home? Sound like a deal?


May 27, 2002 - Msg 7132: A picnic sounds good to me, Asa. My son was wanting to have one out at his house (in a semi-distant suburb) this afternoon, but I'd have to leave there by 5pm in order to be at work by 7pm, so had to decline. He wanted to start around 4. Sure sounded like fun, though. The irritating part is that I may get cancelled if our census drops low enough, but won't know that until 6pm! Trust me, a hospital is a very inconvenient place to work.
Ya'll have fun at the picnic, you hear? Sugarplum says hey!--Romeena

May 27, 2002 - Msg 7133: Hey Porchsters:
I finally have a day off of work to get to home! Huh, wonder what causes that? I was going through boxes and bags trying to get an idea of what to keep, what to give away, and of course what to throw away. A little dent in a big job. But at least it's a start. Happy Belated Birhtday to Asa and Tom. But better late than never!! Got company coming to the porch for a cookout. Steaks are about done. How do you like yours? Come on over...~New Neighbor

May 27, 2002 - Msg 7134: "Got time to breathe, got time for music." I just haven't said that for a while and I know you all must have been a missin' it.

Be careful on the Robert E. Lee natural bridge. It gets powerful treacherous after dark.

Fun Girl (Like you couldn't have guessed. LOL)

May 27, 2002 - Msg 7135: Hey everybody! Busy weekend, I ain't been able to post since Friday. Got to wish Asa happy birthday, but missed Tom's. Sorry Tom, hope you had a wonderful birthday, but by looks of the archives, you missed it too. I don't see any posts from Tom. Hope he's feelin' dandy. Great thoughts on the Sabbath and on Memorial Day, eveyone! We are indeed blessed. My grandma celebrated her 85th birthday yesterday with a grand surprise party! Rock, Saturday my husband and I took the two younguns on a golf outing. Had quite a good time although hubby's patience wore a little thin at times. But for 10 and 11 they didn't do that bad. I enjoyed it. I could play that game if I could just putt! I need lessons in a serious way. Maybe Rock or Asa could give me some tips. I've probably rambled enough. Praise the lord for Salty's cousin. We must always remember to give God the glory when our prayers are answered!
Love to all
Charlotte Tucker

May 27, 2002 - Msg 7136: New Neighbor made me think of "decluttering". Are ya'll familiar with If not, check it out. It's a wonderful free site to help you get your house (and life) organized.

May 27, 2002 - Msg 7137: Hey, Charlotte Tucker. Thanks for that tip, I'll visit that site. New Neighbor, unlike you I haven't changed my place of residence, but do I ever have a lot of clutter! That's what happens when you live in the same place for 28 years, and during that time each of your four children grew up and moved away, leaving bits of their lives behind them. Lots of bits! Then assorted relatives have died, my father moved into a retirement residence, and "since you have that big house and all that space maybe you should take these things". I've got a bi-i-ig cleaning-out job to do. Kids are too far away to help, so guess I'll go it alone. This could take all summer, but I'm going to get it done.
I just praise the Lord that I have the strength to do it, and I'm thankful for the memories that I keep unearthing, though they do slow me down considerably. Haven't found any old yearbooks yet, but I expect I will. Maybe I could organize a reunion -- hmmmmm?
Sugarplum says hey!--Romeena

May 27, 2002 - Msg 7138: Good night to all my dear sweet friends on the porch. Hope your weekend was a good one. God bless.


May 28, 2002 - Msg 7139: Hi All. Thank You for all the birthday wish. it was o k if you like becomming on top of the mount at 50 ha ha.
Memorial day it is the time to remember all the had fight for are right to be free , to do the thing we like and to come and go and not have to
an to noone for at.
So thank God for all the freedom that we have and to keep all who had to dead to keep us free. so prayer go out to the family of the one who have up freedom for i can have my.
Oh Lord, give me of your blessings,
a dawn with a healing of wounds,
a night with a peaceful surrender,
a prayer it will come to me soon.
as i look at the night in its stillness,
i give thanks for the victories won,
give me the gift of compassion,
and a promise to love everyone.
as the dawn springs forth in its glory;
give me strength for the tasks i've begun and let me rejoice in the gladness
and give thanks to Jesus the Son.

May 28, 2002 - Msg 7140: Good Morning Porch! TOM, that was a lovely poem, many thanks (and happy birthday to you!).

Y'all act like someBODY today!

~ Mrs. Wiley

May 28, 2002 - Msg 7141: Morning porch, didn't get home until 1:30 this morning. Hubbie got to race last night. Was doing fine and he spun in turn 2. Well he spun out and was turned backwards and this other car came flying around the track and smacked him head on!! Everybody had been waving at the other guy and the caution lights were on so it wasn't like they couldn't have seem him. So it messed the car up pretty bad. It tore the front bumper off completely.... So now we have until Saturday to get ready again!! What fun! Sorry I missed the picnic. Well I am off to work. Wont get to watch much TAGS today got all the salesmen coming and they all manage to get there at the same time. So Asa, I will only get to watch about 8 eps today. See yall later--Salty Dog

Poor Horatio!!

May 28, 2002 - Msg 7142: Oh I guess I probably should have mentioned the fact that my husband was alright. He could see the guy was going to hit him and was braced for it. Just dont tell him I mentioned the car BEFORE him. tee hee--SD

May 28, 2002 - Msg 7143: Glad the hubbie is OK Salty! That sounds like some exciting fun! ~ Mrs. Wiley

May 28, 2002 - Msg 7144: Mornnin porch. Charlotte Tucker you don't want no putting tips from me. Ithink I've gone blind in one eye and can't see out of the other when it comes to putting. When I was teaching my oldest boy to play golf, we would both hit off the tee then we would pick up his ball and take it to where mine landed then we would both hit from there. we could continue that until we both got on the green. Held the frustration level down for both of us. Salty glad hubby made it through ok. "Boy that's got to smart."
My oldest son got moved back home from Chattanooga and has headed down town to get registered at the University of Tennessee. He is starting on his 5th year of a 4 year program. Sure do hope his education is worth every penny. Hey to Tom, Mrs Wiley, Asa, Romeena, and my other porch buds.

The Rock

"He's a nut." (Barney)

May 28, 2002 - Msg 7145: Now Rock - don't be too hard on your son. . .it took me 7 years to finish my undergraduate degree (I did have three majors though-couldn't pick just one) and then it took e several years to finish my graduate work but I did it in spurts. My niece will be going to UT next year (not this fall) She will graduate fro MTSU with her nursing degree and then get hitched to some dr. fellow and then finish her masters at UT.

Happy belated birthday Chaplain Tom. . .hope it was a blessed birthday!

And now a word from my red headed Opie. . .jesse

Have a good day!


May 28, 2002 - Msg 7146: Mornin' Porch!

Oh boy do I have an update for ya'll today. So much can happen in four days.

Guy Watch '02 Update: Dazed and confused that about covers it..... Naw I'll tell ya mor then that! Ok Mason(guy #1) Is the guy we've been working on. He is very nice but it seems that some improvement could be in order but nobody's perfect. Jeremy(guy #2)is a good friend that told me Thur. that he broke up with his girlfriend and today wants to act real nice and friendly towards me. Josh(guy #3) ...... this is a story......

We went to eat at the Roadhouse last night and while we were in there I spot a nice looking waiter. Has a really cute smile. Well..... my buddy Paul calls him over and asks his name then proceeds to say " Nice to meet you Josh. I'm Paul and this is my friend." He then proceeds to embarass me further (my head is in my hands by now) to ask if he's single, where he's from, etc. Josh then asks "Are ya'll embarassing this girl?" Of course they where and he was very nice about it and just kept smiling. A little later I go to the bathroom and they not only sit him down and ask more questions but give him my phone number! They found out that he was working his way through nursing school, loves the Braves (I'm a diehard fan)and then tell him I need a date. I wanted to crawl under the table when I found out. Josh told them all that he would probably call me....... we'll see.

Boy that was a lot but I thought you all would get a kick out of this. It's kinda funny but I don't know which way to turn so I've given it to the Lord and told him to take control of the situation.

Gotta go before I take up the entire porch!


Miss Dixie Belle

May 28, 2002 - Msg 7147: Howdy, all! Miss Dixie Belle, the best counsel I could offer you would be to continue to allow the Lord to control your life. You never know where your Mr. Right is going to come from. Trust me, I know. At the ripe old age of 17, I was sad, blue and brokenhearted over a boyfriend situation that flopped. I had sworn off "men" forever. Then one Saturday my best friend called and asked me if I'd be willing to double-date with her. A guy friend (not a boyfriend) of hers had promised to get her a date if she would get him one, and we would all go swimming. I reluctantly agreed, on the condition that we'd just meet them at the pool. I didn't want to be stuck with them if we didn't like them. Anyway, when the two young men walked out of the dressing room, I told my friend I hoped the tall, black-haired one was Jim, who was supposed to be my date. He wasn't. Didn't matter. Dale and I made eye contact, heart contact, and that was it. Eight months later we married, and had 38 wonderful years together before the Lord took him home.
Love at first sight? Yes, I guess that's true. Depends on how you define love. I'd like to emphasize here that throughout that eight months, I frequently asked God to confirm my choice, and He did, in many ways. I also asked Him to show me if it was wrong. Nothing ever happened to do that. If it had, I can only hope I would have had the faith and courage to follow His lead, because I was very much in love.
Trust God, seek His counsel, and follow His lead. He will not lead you wrong.--Romeena

May 28, 2002 - Msg 7148: Romeena that's about the sweetest thing I've ever heard. Seriously. I'm very calm about because I know that God will take care of the situation but at the same time I feel very twittery about which one ( if one of these are what God has in mind ) will it be.

Please pray for me:)

Dixie Belle

May 28, 2002 - Msg 7149: I need a thinkin' bucket......where'd they get to???????


May 28, 2002 - Msg 7150: Asa probably has that bucket again DB you know when anything has gone missin to ask him! I'm just glad to see you ain't stuck on just one guy, at your age, that ain't a good thing, need to make sure & I am glad to see you doin just that! Still busy here in Bristol, & wearing me out, anybody want to come clean my house fer me whilst I take a nap??

May 28, 2002 - Msg 7151: Guess what gang. A fourth grader came up and asked me today if I wanted a penny. I said "No, you keep it hon'." Then he pulled it out of his pocket and would you believe it, it had been run over by a train. Of course I had to take it then. It would have been bad luck not to. Besides it will protect me in my travels. The child had a whole pocket full of change run over by a train, so I am sure he will be safe in all his journeys this summer.

Tonight Little Opie graduates from grade school. I am hauling a box of Kleenex with me to the proceedin's Makes me teary eyed just thinking about it. I hope they don't sing "Never Hit Your Grandma With A Great Big Stick," that 'un makes me cry.
Fun Girl

"Arnold says if you put a horse hair in stagnation water, it'll turn into a snake."

May 28, 2002 - Msg 7152: Anybody got a picture of Floyd? I sure do miss his insight.

May 28, 2002 - Msg 7153: That's a real Mayberry moment there, FG! Congrats to lil Opie, I know he makes his Mamma proud *snif! Mavis, I can't clean the whole house, but I'll get the ants from behind your stove and make an ant farm. " Oh NO you wont!"

Romeena, that was such a sweet story! DixieBell, don't be embarased (or at least don't let em see you be), just smile sweetly and be brave. Guys just love to see self-confidence.

~ Mrs. Wiley

May 28, 2002 - Msg 7154: Beav: How come your chopping up those carrots? We're just going to chew them up anyway.
June: Well don't you want your food to look appetizing?
Heck no, I just want it to be ready when I want it.

I knew this wasn't TAGs related, but it was so cute I had to post it. ~ Mrs. Wiley

May 28, 2002 - Msg 7155: Hey porch. I saw that to Mrs. Wiley. In fact I had to get me an Igloo bar out of the freezer. LOL So how are you feeling these days? Must be well if yer thinking on ant farms.
I ain't seen no buckets Mavis or Dixie. I always hide them around my birthday just in case I get the urge to kick one. (HAHAHAHAHAHA, Is I funny or what?)


May 28, 2002 - Msg 7156: I'm feeling much better Asa, still sore and moving slow to be sure, but I make myself go out a couple times a day. When I can stay out more that 2 hrs and not get tired I know it's time to go back to work.

Now don't you go kickin' the bucket!
~ Mrs. Wiley

May 28, 2002 - Msg 7157: What did that bucket ever do to you anyways Asa? LOL you are too funny both of ya'll Mrs. Wiley & Asa you ought to join the circus & call yerselves frick & frack!

May 28, 2002 - Msg 7158: Just got back from Little Opie's graduation. They sang a patriotic number and one boy played the symbols. He reminded me of Barney. When he played he played with all his heart and soul. Would have made the Mayberry band proud.

Many tears were shed tonight. They had a moment of silence in memory of Little Opie's best friend who died earlier this year. There was also a video tape of photos of the kids through out the year. There were several of Jacob and of course that brought tears to the eyes. All in all it was a wonderful time. I am just so glad they didn't play "Never Hit Your Grandma With A Great Big Stick." That would have been my undoing.
Fun Girl

May 28, 2002 - Msg 7159: Hey yall off to bed now been over at my friends garage for awhile. But the coolest thing happened today... I won front row tickets to see Lynyrd Skynyrd in concert. I was so excited I think I hyperventillated. Wow how cool is that? If anyone doesn't know, Skynyrd done Sweet Home Alabama and the always popular Freebird. It wont be the same without Leon Wilkinson this year but I am excited anyways. Well I have rambled on enough. I have got to get in the bed if I can sleep at all. And I heard tonight also that the guy that hit my husband last night had totalled his car out. So,hear the old saying what goes around comes around?? Now, I am off my soapbox. See yall in the morning. Nite--Salty Dog

May 29, 2002 - Msg 7160: Good Morning Porch!! How is everyone? I left some coffee, tea and some orange juice too. Off to work for a while. See yall later-Salty Dog

You get a line and I'll get a pole Honey,
You get a line and I'll get a pole babe,
You get a lina and I'll get a pole and
We'll go down to the crawdad hole honey, baby, mine!!

May 29, 2002 - Msg 7161: Morning porch. Hey Salty, is someone beating yer dog? :) Glad yer hubby is ok. You behave yerself at that concert.
It's tough to see them young-uns grow up isn't it FunGirl. Just wait till they start graduating high school.
Off to work for me. Thanks for the o.j. Salty.
Ya'll act like ya got some smarts now.


May 29, 2002 - Msg 7162: Congrats SD on yur tickets. . .now don't you be partyin' too hard at that concert. I like LS too and so does my hubby. We like the 70's rock and early 80's - don't get me wrong - we like country too but some of the old rock is now considered country rock. Who'd thunk it!
Thanks for the tea (I'll take sweet n low in mine). Too many little debbies and pepsi during ball season left me with some unwanted poundage so now that school is out I am trying to give up some of the things I love too much (little debbies and pepsi) so that I don't need a whole new fall wardrobe for school.

Congrats on your son's graduation FG - I bet there were plenty tears shed for all kinds of reasons. I would have cried during the patriotic number - (I can't go to a parade without Old Glory and Veterans moving me to tears).

Asa - make sure your bullets aren't green for work today - remember to keep un your bullet maintenance!
Hey Mavis - I've started to lay in my supply of salsa ingrediants - have you? I didn't get nearly enough made last year for gifts and boy did I catch it from my regulars.
Happy belated birthday Tom - I was always on the tail end of most parties.
Mrs. Wiley - glad your mending well and it is nice to hear the lilt in your voice.

Everyone have a Mayberry kind of day!


May 29, 2002 - Msg 7163: Good morning Porch! Mavis, you're a regular Emmy Schmaltz, you are ;-)

Lucky Salty winning those tickets! I never was a big LS fan, but growing up in ATL in that era I heard alot of his music. Should be a blast into the past! It might be sad to see how all of them have gotten so much older (won't they be surprised to see that you haven't changed?). Asa, have a fine day at work - I hope nobody kick's your chair while you're nappin'. I'm gonna sit here woth homemaker and have some coffee - I brought some apple turnovers, too! Enjoy!

~ Mrs. Wiley
"...definately Back-bay Boston."

May 29, 2002 - Msg 7164: that's "with" homemaker.

May 29, 2002 - Msg 7165: Lots of spicy talk here on the porch the last day or two. Salty, glad your hubby is ok. Too bad about the car though. Lucky break on them tickets! Hey homemaker, what you busying yourself with these days? I wanted to do all these great fun things with my kids this summer. Yesterday they bout drove me out of my everlovin' mind--trackin' mud, trackin' water, leaving grass all over the bathroom, leavin' their goggles out for the dog to chew up, one thing after another. I'm gonna borrow the bucket today and let them both sit under it awhile! Kids! They're precious but they can try the patience of a saint (not speakin' of myself here). Romeena, all that declutterin' you got to do, you need to check the site this week! There's a major decluttering boogie going on. People are weighing the amounts of clutter they get rid of--trying to reach a total of 2.7 million pounds! Sounds to me like you could help them out. Rock, I was counting on you for that puttin' advice! We already have the kids move up to where our balls land. The most frustration came from their lack of etiquette--being too loud around people trying to tee off and stuff like that. Remind 'em, just keep remindin' 'em I guess. They start a 2-week class next week. Hopefully that will help. It is supposed to focus a lot on etiquette. Great poem, Tom. Great TAGS references on here this time! Fun Girl, I couldn't 've made it through "Never Hit Your Grandma with a Great Big Stick" either! Congrats to Opie. Hang in there Dixie Belle!
Charlotte Tucker

May 29, 2002 - Msg 7166: Mornin', all! Just got in from work, think I'll sit and rock for a few minutes, then off to bed. Gotta go back tonight for another 12 hours. Charlotte Tucker, I've already been to the FlyLady site since you mentioned it yesterday, and have received at least 15 emails from them already! Lots of emails to get through, kinda stuffing my email box, but lots of good hints and suggestions there, too. I've made a "FlyLady" file to save them in, and after I get through working tonight I'll have a few days to read them and follow through on some of it, if not all. My schedule is screwy, of course, which makes it hard to do some of the things she suggests, but we'll make it work.
OK, now for a bite of breakfast, then some shuteye, then back to work. Yep, that's the plan. A little breakfast, off to bed for some sleep, then back to work. Yeah, that's the plan all right, a bite of breakfast, etc., etc., etc. Sugarplum says hey!--Romeena

May 29, 2002 - Msg 7167: Hello All!!! I'm hanging in there!

*Mavis..... You said Bristol.... that wouldn't be Bristol, Florida would it?

Guy Watch '02 update: No phone call yet.

To tell ya the truth I'm kinda leaning toward this Josh guy...... He seemed really nice but I don't know. There are two other ones......

Asa.... whut ya wanna go 'n kick my thinkin' bucket when ya know good-n-well that the dent won't fit over my head?

Gotta go!


Miss Dixie Belle

May 29, 2002 - Msg 7168: Junior's Travel Log:

Hello friends!Well gang, I reaached my destination after stopping for water a few dozen times. The cheeseburgers are great. I've gotten plenty of nibbles on my fishing pole. Andy would be proud. Later, I plan on finding a shade tree and rest my bones from the afternoon heat. More reports coming soon!

See ya,
Briscoe Darling Jr.

May 29, 2002 - Msg 7169: can hear people chew......lunch time......

May 29, 2002 - Msg 7170: Burp..... all done.

May 29, 2002 - Msg 7171: Glad to see the road is treating you well BDJ, enjoy that vacation and thanks for the updates! Got enough sammiches? ~ Mrs. Wiley

May 29, 2002 - Msg 7172: Well Miss Charlotte - we have had mud pies and mud bathrooms. . .and of course - there are the goats to keep them busy. We just got two new ones with babies in tow. We are trading one for another one - the one is a Nubian and we are trading some folks for a boer. We are happy and they are too. My oldest isn't too keen that we do school in the mornings but he is excited that his cousins are coming over next week for school. (I am tutoring the oldest for free and he'll probably end up being one of mine in school when it is over)

Keep us posted DB on Guy Watch 02! Hope someone calls!


May 29, 2002 - Msg 7173: Hey DB nope that would be Bristol, VA/TN the Birthplace of Country Music, wish it was Fla! I love the beach! Salty you lucky dog! Can I come to the concert with ya? Mrs. Wiley I try, I try, but I ain't no Emmy as hard as I do try! homemaker don't have the 'maters yet, but got all the rest of the fixins for the salsa ready to go, took your advice last year, now I got a feeling if I DON'T do it this year I might have to come share the barn with yer goats cause they will run me out of town! Asa you didn't work too hard today did ya? Hope ya'll were quiet so Romeena could sleep today, she needs her rest you know, can't work with no rest!

May 29, 2002 - Msg 7174: Boy I like it pretty good when we start talking about garden harvests. I need homemaker and Mavis to send me some of that salsa. Mrs Asa is a warm wonderful pretty charming women. She's sensitive and kind heated, and a joy to be around, but she can't make salsa, not a lick. Not a lick.


May 29, 2002 - Msg 7175: whoops, kind hearted. Jeepers, don't ya'll get the wrong idea.:)


May 29, 2002 - Msg 7176: Asa are you & Mrs. Asa heading down to the duck pond?? I'll try to keep Opie occupied for ya! heehee

May 29, 2002 - Msg 7177: Asa are you & Mrs. Asa heading down to the duck pond?? I'll try to keep Opie occupied for ya! heehee

May 29, 2002 - Msg 7178: boy that was a good one, I got so tickled at myself had to say it twice!

May 29, 2002 - Msg 7179: Tee hee, yer a mess Mavis.


May 29, 2002 - Msg 7180: Hey porch
I been so busy with work & I had my Granddaughter for 6 days I just took her home this evening. Happy belated Birthday to Tom, Hey to all ((((((HUGS))))))))) TO ALL... Ellen Brown

May 29, 2002 - Msg 7181: Hey Asa, why do you want to go to the duck pond at night?? You can't see the ducks.-;) Salty D

May 29, 2002 - Msg 7182: Well, I guess Asa likes her purty fine! Dixie Belle, don't you be no desperate female hunter now or they just might put you onto the scent of other game!

May 29, 2002 - Msg 7183: You beat everthang, Mavis, you know that.

May 30, 2002 - Msg 7184: I can't believe it! Where are ya'll? I was the last post last night and am up with the chickens this morning! It looks like a lovely day here. Hope ya'll have a great day. The coffee's on. I believe since I'm so perky I'll even make some cinnamon rolls. Help yourselves.
Charlotte Tucker

May 30, 2002 - Msg 7185: Morning porch, I am up early too Charlotte. Dont have to go to work till 2:30 but the husband overslept so, guess who had to get up too? Cinnamon buns were great. Well yall have a good day. I am gonna go have a little nap. Yep thats the plan, Grab me one more cinnamon bun and then have a litle nap. See yall later on! Hey DB any phone calls? Hey do you work anywhere? Maybe they could come in and wink at ya or crinkle their noses or show their muscles. hee hee--Salty Dog

May 30, 2002 - Msg 7186: I dunno Salty, I still think Dixie should hand deliver a bag of peat moss to her chosen one. Show off her muscles a tad. And if all else fails, go to the duck pond... oh my yes, go to the duck pond.


May 30, 2002 - Msg 7187: Ask him again why he wants to go to the duck pond. hee hee Salty D

May 30, 2002 - Msg 7188: Good Day Porch!

Bad news.... Our preacher may be leaving. I cried last night at church until my head felt like spliting. He feels that God may want him to go back to his former church b/c they are apparently having trouble and have been asking him to come back for years. Please remeber us in your prayers.

Guywatch '02 Update: No phone call but I can't get this Josh dude out of my head. He seemed like a really nice person. I kinda would like to get to know him better but I can't unless given the opportunity. Pray for me please :)

*Mavis-- It's a shame it isn't Fla. b/c Bristol, Fl. is kinda near me.

Peat moss, muscles &nose crinkling, or Duck Pond.....hmmmm that's a tough decision!

I promise not to be a desperate female hunter..... unless I get desperate(HA!).

Prayers to those who need them -n- haven't asked;)


Miss Dixie Belle

May 30, 2002 - Msg 7189: Junior's Travel log:

Hello friends! Fish aint bittin' today. So I decided to go stroll down Duval St. It takes 30 minutes from end to end. I stopped at the southernmost point and told Castro, Goober says hey. Later, I'll go to Sloppy Joe's for dinner. More later.

Briscoe Darling Jr.
Hey ta':
Mrs. Wiley
Fun girl
An' everyone!

May 30, 2002 - Msg 7190: Sounds like fun Briscoe. You gettin any of them breakfast specials, you know that's served between 5 and 6 am? You can't sleep late anyhow.
How is everyone doing today? Hotter than heck on my porch. 95 today, thats good and warm. My corn likes the heat, musta growed 2 inches just today. Sure could go for some ice lemonade. Anyone want some?


May 30, 2002 - Msg 7191: A guy in Wilson, NC has recreated Wally's Filling Station in his own backyard. Open afternoons on weekends. Didn't look exactly like it but boy does he have the memorabilia in there (saw it on tv).
Romeena, one person I know of that was very insightful, but could not see, hear and was mute
for a while, says the following :
When one door of happiness closes, another opens, but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not
see the one which has been opened for us.
- Helen Keller
"Face your deficiencies and acknowledge them; but do not let them master you. Let them teach you patience, sweetness, insight."
- Helen Keller
I have always admired her.
Salty Dog, I missed where your husband races at. My hubby loves Nascar, especiall the Winston Races. He pulls for Jeff Gordon.
Good to see everyone. Getting to be good porch weather now.
Miss Ellie

"Watch your foot, I'm rocking forward." Wally

May 30, 2002 - Msg 7192: A Big Hello to the Porch! FRANKIE FLINT

May 30, 2002 - Msg 7193: Evening porch, off to bed had a long day. Miss Ellie, the hubby races at a dirt track near here. We love NASCAR too our fav is Dale Jr. Still miss big Dale though. Hope yall have a great weekend. First one I have had off in a while. Gonna do some fishin, some layin out in the sun and of course racing!! See yall tomorrow. Miss DB keep up posted on GW02. This I gotta see. It ought to be better than a movie!! Nite--Salty Dog

May 30, 2002 - Msg 7194: HELLO to you to Frankie. You snuck in on me!!-SD

May 31, 2002 - Msg 7195: Hey Frankie, Salty, Asa, Briscoe Darlin, Dixie Belle, and Miss Ellie. My, what words of wisdom, Miss Ellie. I realize they're Helen Keller's but thanks for sharing them with us. DB, I still think biting the bottom of f a snowcone and suckin' all the juice out is a great guy catcher. Just make sure yer "danged eye lashes don't get in the way." I'll take some lemonade, Asa. We put up the kids' 15' x 3' deep pool tonight. Didn't get it quite full of water yet though. It was nice here today. Everybody have a good one.
Charlotte Tucker
P.S. Where is everybody hidin'? Where's Aunt Bee, Romeena, Helen, Mavis, Mrs. Wiley, Rock, Ellen Brown, and the rest (sounds like a Gilligans Island tune)!

May 31, 2002 - Msg 7196: Morning Porch. Morning Charlotte, I agree, where is everyone? Our Hazel is missing in action. Hope she is ok. So what are the plans for the weekend? Salty sounds like she has her's all planned out. I just might go do a little water skiing. Then a little golf, then a nice BBQ. Yep thats the plan here, ski, golf, BBQ. DON'T YOU JUST LOVE SUMMERTIME? Ya;ll have a good one.


May 31, 2002 - Msg 7197: Morning porch, I am late this morning. Computer was acting up. Well I think summertime is finally here. Gonna be in the 80's today. Asa, you be careful on them skis now. And dont get your skis and your golf clubs mixed up. I dont think that those clubs would float very well. tee hee;) Yall have a good weekend hope everyone has great weather. See yall after work. Oh anyone for Chineese tonight? --Salty Dog


If I seem to be in a chipper mood this morning this is why.....

Guywatch "02 Update: We have hit the jackpot! I was talking to my friend Meagan and told her the story of the waiter Josh and she informs me that she has cousin named Josh that works at the Roadhouse named Josh. She made a phone call to her Maw-maw and discovered that the two match. Her cousin is also doing Nursing and is a Braves fan...... everything matches. It has to be the one and the same. I think we may make some progress with this one! I'm so excited I can hardly sit still!!

Hey to CT, Asa, SD, homemaker, *Mavis(Iknow I still haven't e-mailed...i keep fergettin'), Briscoe, Rock, Romeena, Mrs. Wiley, Ellen Brown, Helen, Ms. Elleie, Frankie, Fun Girl, Aunt Bee, and ~Des~ (do you remeber me? Do you still visit?). I think that covers anyone but if I missed one a VERY special hey to you;)


Miss Dixie Belle

May 31, 2002 - Msg 7199: Hi, all! Miss DB, that sure does sound promising. Just keep it light. A smart predator is careful not to scare off the prey! Charlotte Tucker, thanks again for the FlyLady website tip. I'm having fun with it, and actually starting to "de-clutter" things a tiny bit. Miss Ellie, you're so right about Helen Keller. Actually, I thought of her as I was posting that day. She's a prime example of how one sense can make up for others. For her, it was an extreme case, but the sense of touch finally opened the doors to everything else. What a magnificent personality she was.
Well, off I go. More de-cluttering to do. Wish I could just "call the man" to come do this! Everybody have a lovely Mayberry day, hear?--Romeena

Sugarplum says hey!

May 31, 2002 - Msg 7200: Well, Nana and Papaw got Little Opie a fishin' pole, complete with all those little do-hickies you need and a cool tackle box. In a couple weeks his great-grandpa is coming to go fishing. Lots of people in the places they used to camp still talk about the "old fisherman." He is eighty-five years old and still manages to make a trip tubing down the Current River in Missouri every August.

It sounds like soon Little Opie will, "Take down the fishing pole and we'll go to the fishin' hole.
If we don't get a bite all day, well don't you go away........Can anyone finish it for me, if you are a TRUE TAGS fan you will be able to do it easy.
Fun Girl

May 31, 2002 - Msg 7201: What a great place to rest your bones and mighty fine for skippin' stones. You'll feel fresh as a lemonade, a settin' in the shade.

May 31, 2002 - Msg 7202: Oops, forgot to sign my name. Sorry, I couldn't finish all the words, Fun Girl.
- Hazel

May 31, 2002 - Msg 7203: "Well now take down your fishin' pole, and meet me at the fishin' hole. We may not get a bite all day, but don't you rush away. If we don't get a perch or bass, we'll cool our toes in dewy grass. I can't think of a better way to pass the time of day.

Whether it's hot...Whether it's cool...Whether or not I'll be whistling like a fool."

I believe that's how it goes.


May 31, 2002 - Msg 7204: Hzel... i fergot to say hey to you so HEY!


May 31, 2002 - Msg 7205: Hey to the Porch.


"Well, that just means the house has settled.."
"I guess it's not important.."

May 31, 2002 - Msg 7206: `

May 31, 2002 - Msg 7207: Don'tcha think you'll need a wrench?--Romeena

May 31, 2002 - Msg 7208: Dixie Belle, settle down girl! Reread your message 7198! Josh, Josh, Josh, you even called the Roadhouse Josh! Good luck, hon! Good to hear from you, Hazel. Asa was a lookin' for ya. Don't work too hard, Salty. Our weather here is beautiful too. You think more people'd be sittin' on the porch.
Charlotte Tucker

May 31, 2002 - Msg 7209: Evening porch! Off to bed now had a long day at work. Got the weekend off. Going to do some fishing and some racing. Got my Skynyrd tickets in the mail today and I got all excited all over again. Cant wait until the 9th. Yall have a good evening. See yall tomorrow! I hope Asa didn't get tangled up in those skis!! --Salty Dog

June 01, 2002 - Msg 7210: Morning folks. Thought I'd pop in before heading out to tne links. Salty, when I golf I usually spend as much time in the water as I do when I ski so either way, I'm all wet.:)
Ya'll come on over for a BBQ tonight. We gonna have us a feast.


June 01, 2002 - Msg 7211: Oh goodness, I almost forgot.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANDY GRIFFITH. You will always be 35 and in black and white in my eyes.


June 01, 2002 - Msg 7212: Good Morning, porch.
- Hazel

June 01, 2002 - Msg 7213: Morning porch, off to the lake see ya later--Salty Dog

June 01, 2002 - Msg 7214: Mornin' off to a mule and donkey show. . .then a 'gradiashun' party for my niece. . .have a good day!


June 01, 2002 - Msg 7215: I did not know today was Andy's birthday. Well,add my happy birthday wishes to the list. Hope Aunt Bea bakes a big birthday cake and Barney organizes a big birthday cake at the Mayberry courthouse! Sam Scott

June 01, 2002 - Msg 7216: Correction, I hope Barney organizes a big birthday party. SAM SCOTT

June 01, 2002 - Msg 7217: Miss Dixie Belle, I am single and looking. Been married once, and it only lasted 3 months. I am 48 be 49 June 23. I am white, 6 foot 3 and weigh 270. SAM SCOTT 147 NORTH MAIN STREET APT. 3D. MADISONVILLE, KENTUCKY 42431.

June 01, 2002 - Msg 7218: Happy Birthday to Andy from me too. --Salty D

June 01, 2002 - Msg 7219: Sam, do you like Raspberry snow cones?!? There you go, db...

Andy's birthday today, huh? Well, what do you say gang? Here we go:
"What's the matter with Andy, he's all right..."


June 01, 2002 - Msg 7220: Hello,
Can someone help me? I am in charge of Bible School and want to use some of the Shows in our Adult Bible Study course. My problem, is that our VBS starts June 17 and I don't know how to get copies of the shows that I need. (TVLAND is not airing these particular shows.) I need "Deputy Otis" "Opie and the Bully" "Andy on Trial" "Opie the Birdman" and "A Feud is a Fued".
If someone could help me find these episodes so that our adults can have as much fun as the kids, I would be eternally grateful! If someone could suggest where to buy these---or if someone could make me a copy that I could pay for?? Any suggestions are welcomed! Thanks so much! Leann in North Carolina (not too far from Mt Pilot!)

June 01, 2002 - Msg 7221: It might help if I posted my email address---
Thanks and sorry to be a pest!

June 01, 2002 - Msg 7222: Happy Birthday Mr. Griffith! I think you are an incredible actor. I've enjoyed all the movies you have done, loved the comedy albums and of course TAGS has become part of my family's lives. Thank you for all you have given us!

~ Mrs. Wiley

Hey to Sam Scott, db, Charlotte, BDJ, homemaker, Hazel, Mavis, Asa, Romeena, Jelsik, Salty and FunGirl. Hope I didn't miss anyone!

June 01, 2002 - Msg 7223: Happy Birthday Andy!! Hope you have many more.Hope all is well on the porch! Gotta go already. Take care--Helen



June 01, 2002 - Msg 7225: Leonard, how's your skin condition?
- Hazel

June 01, 2002 - Msg 7226: Hi, this is Happy and I have not been here in a while. I am writing to ask for prayers. My friend Theresa is just 42 and yesterday the doctor gave her six months to live, she has cancer. She also has a beautiful son, wonderful husband and a great life. Please remember Theresa in your prayers and ask God to make her well. Thank you very much.


June 02, 2002 - Msg 7227: Hey porch, back home from fishing and the races. I coudn't help but laugh tonight. The car that had hit my husband on Monday was trying to wreck the other cars tonight and being very unsportsmanlike to say the least. Censors wont let me say what he was really being. But at the last lap he tried to run this one car into the guard rail and spun out and ran up on the guard rail himself!! A bunch of us stood up and cheered for him. Well I think it serverd him right. After Monday. Prayers for Happy that is so sad about your friend. I also have a prayer request of my own which I will mention later on but God knows what it is. Well I am off to bed it is almost 3 in the moring. See yall at preaching!! Salty Dog

June 02, 2002 - Msg 7228: Durn those censors. I wanted to hear what the man was being. Nice to have you back, Happy. Sorry about your friend.
- Hazel

June 02, 2002 - Msg 7229: Morning porch, Anyone for some Krispy Kreme donuts? I have some fresh ones. Glazed, choc. glazed and blueberry. Come on over. Well Hazel, I will tell ya one day what the man was. Hope yall have a good Sunday. See ya later--Salty Dog

Oh he's a strange one
He's a trouble maker is what he is.
I think he's a nut!!!

June 02, 2002 - Msg 7230: Afternoon Porch! just hurrying by to say hey got lots to do today & hope to be done in enough time to sit for a spell afterwhile!

June 02, 2002 - Msg 7231: Where is ever'body, did ya'll change the meeting place again & forget to tell me?

June 02, 2002 - Msg 7232: Good Sabbath Porch - nothin' better'n a krispy-kreme on Sunday! Prayers for your friend Happy and your intention Salty - many thanks (munch munch)

~ Mrs. Wiley

June 02, 2002 - Msg 7233: I'm right c'here. ~ Mrs. Wiley

June 02, 2002 - Msg 7234: Hey, friends! Salty, thanks for the Krispy Kreme! (mmmpff) There's just (chew, slurp) no better donut (smack) anywhere. I especially like these cyber-donuts, because they don't bother my blood sugar a-TAALLL! I can eat all I want. May I have another one?
Happy, I'm so sorry about your friend. Some things we just aren't allowed to understand, and it's so hard not to question, and sometimes I do! I've asked God many times to let me know why something had to happen. Sometimes He answers, sometimes not. The point is, the nature of the question is such that it acknowledges that He does indeed have His reasons, which is a way of acknowledging his sovereignty. I don't think He minds our asking, I think He understands, and will tell us if He thinks we can bear the answer.
Well, I think I just heard a nap call me, guess I'll go see if I can find it. Probably find it somewhere around my big chair, or maybe in the bedroom. I'll find it, never fear! I'll bet there's even a small nap alongside, just Sugarplum's size! Have a great evening, friends.--Romeena

June 02, 2002 - Msg 7235: Andy Box set on TVLand at 8:00 eastern... 10-4

June 02, 2002 - Msg 7236: Good evening ya'll! I would have loved a Krispy Kreme this morning but seeing that I gave up sweets for a while - thanks but no thanks:(
The gradiashun party was a success so now my niece is off to Ky Christian College in the fall. . .


June 02, 2002 - Msg 7237: Hey Porch, Whats cooking tonight??? Hope all is well with everyone.
Sorry about your friend Happy, they be in my prayers. Where you been hiding? We've missed you.
Hey to Mavis, and Salty, and Hazel, and our sweet Mrs. Wiley who is getting better all the time, and Romeena, and Sugarplum, and our beloved homemaker, and Helen and everyone. Hope you all have a great week ahead and all are safe.