September 03, 2002 - Msg 8769: Asa are you not getting words or nothin in those emails? I just updated to Outlook Express 6 hoping that would help. Reckon it didn't? I'm off to take a nap, not feeling too swift today & no it weren't too much partying over the week-end, I worked more than I do at my regular job getting stuff for the rebellion done.

September 03, 2002 - Msg 8770: OUCH.
- Hazel

September 03, 2002 - Msg 8771: Yahoo, Hazel is back. Are you hurting dear? Just pull up a rocker here and relax. Salty will bring you a cold pepsi or whatever you want. I'll fan you.:)
Hey Mavis, I just get whatever you have typed but nothing to open or download comes with it. Must be a good one.


September 03, 2002 - Msg 8772: Yes, Fun Girl, where is our precious Rock? I miss his coffee in the mornin'.
Charlotte Tucker

September 03, 2002 - Msg 8773: It is better to give and receive.
brought to you by Opie, leading newspaper man and snazzy dancer

Just for you Fun Girl!

September 03, 2002 - Msg 8774: Hello all - what a busy day and Mavis had time to sweep the porch - aren't you just a dear! I heard that brooms are not aerodynamically customized for Asa's hands!

It will be a busy week for me - two more days at the Autism class that I was drafted into taking. It is interesting but my backside sure does get sore from sitting. I think that I am coming down with a headache (most likely a migraine) for tomorrow afternoon's session.

I hope you feel better Hazel. . .keep Asa a fanning you all he can. I heard he's your number one FAN!
(I just crack myself up Ha Ha Ha Ha - I am funnier than a screen door on a submarine!)

Oh well - I'll see you all when I am done with my class - probably on Friday!


September 03, 2002 - Msg 8775: A screen door on a submarine? You should be on that talent show in Mt. Pilot Homemaker. Funny lady. Hope you don't get no bruises there in your derriere. (now thats funny)


September 03, 2002 - Msg 8776: You know Asa - I get all my jokes from Howard!


September 03, 2002 - Msg 8777: Forget about all these jokes... am I gonna pull thru?
- Hazel

September 03, 2002 - Msg 8778: You will Hazel. I can see that spunk in your eyes again. Glad you are able to join us some. You can see how homemaker is beating up on me. (sniff sniff). Did Doc Benson do your operation?


September 03, 2002 - Msg 8779: Hazel glad to see you back, we NEED you here to keep Asa in line, who by the way is trying to open up & download things that aren't even there. And he says I'M hittin the cider! Been trying to get some new games to work on this here puter & having a devil of a time, I quit for the night, Mr. Neff, can just watch hunting shows on tv til I can figger out his new game. I'm off to bed. Nite Porch!

September 03, 2002 - Msg 8780: Yeah, Asa, it was young Doc Benson that did my operation. Sure hope he knew what he was doing. He did give me some good drugs though. Earlier I was actin' right curious. I saw a chocolate birthday cake with candles. A gun went off. There were doilies on the chairs. Oh, and a polka-dot tie.
- Hazel

P.S. Thanks for all the good thoughts for my recovery, everybody.

September 03, 2002 - Msg 8781: Happy Healin' and Good night, Hazel
Charlotte Tucker

September 03, 2002 - Msg 8782:

Howdy, folks.

Y'all still here?

Goober, would you tell her to quit hanging her head out the window like a dog.

Ernest T.,
I ain't he.
His name's last,
it be Bass.
...And that starts with "B" and that rhymes "T" and that stands for Trouble...right 'chere in Mayberry!

September 04, 2002 - Msg 8783: Mornin' Y'all! Welcome back to the porch Hazel. You picked a good place to recouperate-we'll take good care of ya up here! Got a box of Poptarts 'specially for you! Everybody else help themselves to biscuits & gravy this morning.
Y'all have a wonderful Wednesday!
possum under a rock
P.S. Asa,round up your posse-we gotta find Boo so's we can take him with us to the picture show this weekend!

September 04, 2002 - Msg 8784: I think we done scared him off possum. He ain't been seen since the lastr time we went.
I agree, it is nice to see our Hazel up here rocking away, peeling her apple.
Where has our Salty and Romeena and Mrs. Wiley gotten off to?
Must get off to work now. Fought a headache yesterday, hope it don't come back today. Ya'll be good now.


September 04, 2002 - Msg 8785: Mornin porch--SD

September 04, 2002 - Msg 8786: Hey to the Porch -
Happy Birthday to one of the Porch's all-time greats, Jennie Boone!

September 04, 2002 - Msg 8787: Hello friends! homemaker, it's good to be back amoung all you great people. I still need some personal thoughts on Mt. Airy, if anybody has been there. I'm going with my family in October. Have a Mayberry day. Happy Birthday Jennie!

Briscoe Darling Jr.

September 04, 2002 - Msg 8788: Hideeho!

Glad to see you didn't blow away CT!!

Thanx for explaining the Count thing *Mavis, I get it now!

Prayers for you and the Family Romeena. God still preforms Miracles!

Asa--So glad to hear that the Missus is back!BTW how was my steak? Not over done I hope!

Now for all those avid Guywatch '02 Watchers we have another exciting update!

Guywatch '02 Update: Well My deary came over Monday night so I could help him study for an in-class essay. We had a right nice time considering it had to be over school work. Then being the silly goose I am I had big problems sleeping that night. Funny thing was that I had no butterflies and was able to act completely like myself........Strange but nice!

So what do ya'll think of it all?

Miss Dixie Belle

September 04, 2002 - Msg 8789: Fun Girl, I dipped my hat in the horse trouft to fill up the creek over the Robert E. Lee Bridge. I wouldn't want the fine people of Mayberry to be out any money, because of me. Howdy *Mavis and Dixie. An' everyone!

Briscoe Darling Jr.

September 04, 2002 - Msg 8790: Hey to the Porch.

BDjr, you still juggin'? How about a little "What's the matter with Jennie...she's all-right..."
Happy Birthday,'re the cats!


September 04, 2002 - Msg 8791: oh, and Hey to Mizz Wiley and Mavis...
Mavis, how's everything in SW VA? (God's country)

--Jelsik The Bulkhead

September 04, 2002 - Msg 8792: Well BDJ, glad to hear that you feel some sort of responsibility to return back to it's natural beautiful state, the water beneath the R.E.Lee Natural Bridge. Maybe you ain't half bad after all. As far as Mayberry is concerned, we ate at the Snappy Lunch, (The mister had a pork tenderloin and they musta killed a mighty big hog cause it almost took up the whole table.) Then little Opie got his hair cut at Floyd's Barber Shop. We drove past Andy G's childhood home and saw the house that he modeled the Taylor's home after. There is the Andy Griffith Play House. The home of theatrical productions in the town. And a Andy G. museum which is kinda neat. I don't remember where, but I bought me a "Mayberry Union High" sweatshirt. I think in the museum you can find a map that shows you points of interest. All in all it's a fun day, a real fun day." Try looking it up one the net. It may be under Mt. Airy, N.C. or for some reason the Surrey Arts Council pops into my head. Maybe that is Surrey Co.? I am not sure.

Now as far as Boo is concerned (His name is not Boo, Scout. It's Arthur.) Maybe he died and they stuffed him up the chimney. (That's what Jem said they did.) Maybe if we make a trail of lemon drops from his door to our porch, he would follow it and come and talk to us. Or maybe we could stick a note in the shutters on the window with a fishing pole (ole Eagle Eye Annie) and he would read it and we could say come out and play with us. Wherever he is I hope he aint scarred and he will come back soon.

Guess who called my yesterday and asked me to come back to work. I just let the machine get it. They said the lady who took my place didn't work out and would I reconsider and call the principal and tell her I would come back. (Well I ain'ta gonna do it unless thing change.)

That is all I have to say about the subject.
Fun Girl

September 04, 2002 - Msg 8793: Howdy, friends. Just a quick visit, got to go to work shortly. Miss Dixie Belle, what I think is, I think our little girl is growin' up! Fun Girl, you hang in there, dear, and stick to your principles. Maybe you'll make a difference for somebody else.
Don't mean to be so quiet, but lots going on right now, as you all know. We still need those prayers, folks. Looks like my daughter-in-law will have to carry the baby to full term, but the doctors still aren't offering much hope, almost none, that he can survive after delivery. But it's true, God is still in the business of making miracles, so we will just leave it with him and wait and see.
Have a great evening, friends. Sugarplum says hey!--Romeena

September 04, 2002 - Msg 8794: Hey BDJ, just found some sights for you to check out.

I don't know how to cut and paste, or if it even works on something like this. Anyway, here they are.

Fun Girl

September 04, 2002 - Msg 8795: OOPS, the first address should be

September 04, 2002 - Msg 8796: Prayers to your loved ones Miss Romeena. . .

September 04, 2002 - Msg 8797: Looks like things are going your way FunGirl. Hang in there.
Happy Birthday to Jenni Boone. She shares a birthday with Ernest T. Bass. He is 83 today I hear. Cool stuff.
Good to see you Briscoe.
Why you so queit Salty? Everythang ok dear?


September 04, 2002 - Msg 8798: Whoops, I meant quiet.


September 04, 2002 - Msg 8799: Jelsik things here in my beautiful neck of Kelsey's woods is wonderful. We got them warm days & chilly nights right now & thems my favorite! Ya'll should come visit. Romeena don't count completely on what them Dr's say, I have a little cousin who just turned 7 last month that wasn't supposed to live either, in fact, they were delivering a 'still-born' baby according to them, he was supposed to be blind, not walk, have to be on oxygen you name it, but even tho the poor little fellar has to have really thick glasses & is legally blind, he is here & he can tell you who is driving up the driveway! How's that for a still born baby?? Just put it in God's hands & He will do the rest but then you already know that don't you?

September 04, 2002 - Msg 8800: Hi All, Will thing was going good for me mothre for the pass for days , but she had to go back to the hoso for hre leg , so she will be going for some help to reused the leg.
she was a handy fill for us wind it came time for taking card of her like gitting her out of bed thing .
A good friend of me pass away last weed from the west nile virus he was 75. prayer for his family.
We should love people not
only with words and talk,
but by our actions and true
caring. This is the way we
know that we belong to the way of truth.
When our hearts make us feel
We can still have peace before God.
God is greater than our hearts, and he knows everything.

September 05, 2002 - Msg 8801: Mornin' Y'all! Looks like I'm the early bird on the porch this morning-well,let's see what I can scrounge up for about some bacon,grits and fresh squeezed orange juice? I still have poptarts for y'all "fast food" lovers!
My kids at school have been unruly,to put it mildly and we're getting a new little girl on Monday! Our class is the "dumping ground"-seems they go out and recruit kids or something! Special needs kids= big $$$$$. Shame WE don't see any of it.We have to beg just for things like baby wipes and pampers.Right now we're out of paper towels,so guess I'd better bring some from my rock.Sorry doings,if you ask me!
Didn't mean to get all fired up this morning,but as I wake up and think about work and all the foolishness I put up with,it makes me want to stay under my rock today! But...I'll muddle through somehow!
Asa,you'd best find out what happened to Boo and Salty cuz I ain't hauling you to the picture show alone! Ha Ha
possum under a rock

September 05, 2002 - Msg 8802: Morning Porch. Hang in there Tom. You are in my prayers. So are you Romeena. We all love you guys.
Hey Possum, sounds like you don't get a lot of support from the higher ups there at school. Seems to be a lot of that in education from what I hear and see. Thank goodness there are caring dedicated folks like you still involved with education. Maybe we can get Mavis and Hazel to go with us to the show. They like a fun time. Wish Salty would get in here and say something. Hope she is ok.
Well, gotta get to! Whew, thats hard to get out sometimes. If it's that hard saying it you can imagine how hard it is doing it. Take care my friends.


September 05, 2002 - Msg 8803: Don't forget me! I was on vacation last time. I want to go to the picture show! I want to see TKAM now since I've just read the book. Prayers for your mother, Tom. Glad she's doing better. Sorry about your friend. We sure are nervous about that West Nile Virus here. We don't even go out after about 6:00 p.m. We need a freeze. Possum, what exactly is your job with kids? Hope that school district finds ya'll some hidden money somewhere. Glad to see ya Dixie Belle. Hey to Jelsik and Briscoe Darling. Where's Salty? Happy birthday to jennieboone! How's Hazel a doin these days?
Charlotte Tucker

September 05, 2002 - Msg 8804: The black and whites are back on TVLand! Yah!

September 05, 2002 - Msg 8805: Morning yall. Asa I aint been nowheres other than work that is. And no I aint seen Boo neither. And while were talking about long lost ones where has NN been? Tom your poem was as always beautiful. I am sorry for your loss of your friend. Possum, are you up for another night out with Asa? We need to get a game plan together first. Yall have a good day and I will see yall after work.--Salty Dog

September 05, 2002 - Msg 8806: Hey All! I'm back. Beulah's been keepin' me so busy I can't see straight. I guess I'll try the picture show again (I can't believe I'm sayin' this). Let's just leave the dadburn goat at home this time! What's showin' in Mt. Pilot??? I'm in the mood for somethin' scary like the Mummy or The Blob. Hey maybe after, we can the hit the diner an then maybe go to the duck pond and sneak up on spoonin' couples and SCARE 'em. What do ya say?

Just want to say thanks to Tom for the verse, it is just what I needed to hear. Hang in there Romeena. We are praying for you and your family, Dear.

Oh, before I forget. Does anyone want to buy a buffalo nickle with the buffalo facing the wrong way. There are only one or two in the whole country!--------Love, Boo

September 05, 2002 - Msg 8807: Good morning, all you hilarious people! What would I do without you? Now, all you movie-goers, my invitation still stands. Remember I told you I have the movie, TKAM. If'n you all want to come over here and watch it, instead of taking your chances at the picture show, I'd be very happy to have you. I'll even make an extra jug of tea (not sweet, you can sweeten it yourself if you like) and I always have cold Pepsi on hand. I'll stir up a batch of cookies, and we could make some popcorn, too. Sugarplum loves it, and would enjoy visiting various laps in exchange for a treat. Got lots of room, two big old deep sofas and a couple of soft easy chairs. If you want a big night out in Mt. Pilot, I'll understand, but you're welcome here. Maybe somebody could pick up Tom and bring him along. He'd be very comfortable in my favorite chair. So, just let me know what you decide, okay? Sugarplum says hey! --Romeena

September 05, 2002 - Msg 8808: Hello all! Continued prayers Romeena. fun girl, Thanks a heep for your help. Those sites helped a lot. You shore put a glow in a man's day. I mean it.

Briscoe Darling Jr.
Hey ta':
fun girl
All th' newcomers.
An' everyone!

September 05, 2002 - Msg 8809: Good morning porch, I am back too! (You didn't even know I was gone!) My hubby and I did an art show in Northern Michigan over the Labor day weekend, (and boy did we LABOR), and then we got to visit a dear friend, ride her horses and play lots of cards! Sometimes it feels so good to get away. What am I saying, it ALWAYS feels good to get away!

Romeena, be encouraged God has a way of sneaking up on us and leaving a blessing in our laps when we least expect it. I have a nephew who is turning four in October, he was 1 pound, 10 ounces at birth. Not sposed to do too well and all that. Well, you know how they say when you have a baby and you can't wait for them to walk and talk and then when they do walk and talk you tell them to shut up and sit down?! Well, he's one of those! He is so cute, so active, so healthy, we call him Joe Joe the wonderboy! I just love him to pieces! I will be praying for your situation.

Welcome back to Boo! I kinda like Abbot and Costella meet Frankenstein, how about that at the picture show?

Hey to Possum! All I can say is it is a good thing they have fine people like yourself watching over those "dumping grounds". You are as much a hero in my book as firemen, policemen, etc. You help make the world a better place. Remember, there are those of us who truly appreciate and treasure the work you do!

Have a great day!
Mary Wiggins

September 05, 2002 - Msg 8810: Morning, porch. Good to see Boo back. And Briscoe, glad to have you with us. Jelsik, don't be such a stranger. Happy birthday, yesterday, Jennie Boone. I'm doing pretty good, Charlotte, thanks for asking. I think watching the movie over at Romeenas and Sugarplums house sounds fine. Can someone swing by and pick me up? I'll call Helen and Mrs. Wiley and Ellen Brown.
- Hazel

September 05, 2002 - Msg 8811: Hey Hazel, I'll stop by on my way to Romeena's for TKAM. I am hauling a big sack of baby carrots for Plum so's she will sit on my lap.

BDJ- Glad you enjoyed the sights. Hope you have a great time in Mt. Airy. I bet it'll be right purty around the time that you are there. Didn't you say that you were going in October?

Well, about them special babies. My sister works in Newborn Intensive Care and sees many miracles every day, so keep your chin up. I had a step sister who the doctors told that her son was gonna be born with down's syndrome. Well he is just as sharp as he can be. He is in third grade and kinda like Mary Wiggins' nephew.

Well folks, I am off to Ponderosa for the steak buffet. Do ya'll have Ponderosa's where ever you are? Chatter at ya later.
Fun Girl

September 05, 2002 - Msg 8812: Hey Fun Girl. I get dibs on the plumster first. I an her Uncle after all.:) Will you pick me up to. I ain't far from Hazel's place.
Hey Mary Wiggin's. We missed ya, honest we did. Glad yer back with us.
I'm gonna go see Floyd and get the works if I'm going to Romeena's house. She is a class act.


September 05, 2002 - Msg 8813: Oh. BTW, I have discovered it is Floyd's wedding anniversery. 10 Years. Way to go Floyd. We will get you a watch with 10 on it.


September 05, 2002 - Msg 8814: Hey Fun Girl, Yep, I'm going in October. The rates are cheaper then. Going for Mayberry Days would cost me too much BREAD! Lol! Good to see you too Hazel and Charlotte.

Briscoe Darling Jr.

September 05, 2002 - Msg 8815: Afternoon! Well, It's been a day! I'm not sure if it should be called good or bad.......what ever it was it was a day! Just thought I'd check in.

********SNIFF********* Our little girl is all growed up an in LOVE! L-U-V, Love! Haha:-)

Hey to everyone that's a-rockin' on the porch this afternoon! And BEHAVE!

Miss Dixie Belle

September 05, 2002 - Msg 8816: Good afternoon porch - glad to see everyone is acting like somebody - even Asa!


September 05, 2002 - Msg 8817: Asa, no you can't ride with us to Romeena's house for the movie, cause you plan on hogging up all the attention from Plum. Whoever gets there with the baby carrots gets the attention and may the best person win.
Fun Girl

September 05, 2002 - Msg 8818: Evening Y'all! I stand before you a humble possum.All those kind words coming from everyone in regards to my job.Mary,you are so sweet! Thank you kindly.If I didn't love those kids,I wouldn't be doing what I do ,cause it sure gets to be hard at times.Charlotte,I'm an aide in a Special Ed. class.We have kids ranging in age from 3-7.All sorts of problems-cerebral palsy,SMA(similar to Lou Gehrig's disease)brain disorders,things most people never heard of.Wheelchairs,walkers and a few kids that are as fast as Gilly Walker's car! Wonder of wonder though-we got supplies today! Tons of paper towels! Lucky we got those.District is on a tight budget-putting all the money into a new multi-million dollar high school that we don't need.Anyway... Glad Boo is back! You go get a manicure before we head over to Romeena's to see TKAM.Guess we'll pass on the picture show and take her up on her offer.At least we'll FINALLY get to see TKAM...unless Asa pulls one of his stunts.Salty,what're we gonna do with him? Think we ought to let him have his bongos back? Maybe we can stick him in the back of the room & let him bongo while we watch Romeena's movie.Hazel & Mavis,if y'all are joining us how bout y'all bring your skillets.Boo might act up too-ya never can tell what those two fellers might do!
TGtomorrow's F!!!
possum under a rock

September 05, 2002 - Msg 8819: I ain't even gonna try to fight for Plum's attention, she will know I am a dog groomer & not want to sit with me very long anyway, furkids know things like that, don't know how they do, but they do. I'll brang the skillet if ya need it, it's a big old cast iron one too, last time Asa went to Romeena's he was hanging Christmas lights & bout fell off the roof, like to never have got him down & got them lights straightened out, & he blamed that on the goat too! Romeena want me to bring anything besides the skillet? By the way, could ya'll fill me in on TKAM, I'm as lost as a bloodhound with a head cold!

September 05, 2002 - Msg 8820: To Kill A Mockingbird. (TKAM)

September 05, 2002 - Msg 8821: Hey, folks! Mavis, TKAM is short for "To Kill A Mockingbird". The gang has been trying to see it for weeks now, and have had some mishap or other every time. There has been talk of Asa overdosing himself with Brylcreem, and all sorts of shenanigans. Which reminds me, everyone is welcome here to watch the movie, just please don't embarrass me in front of my neighbors, you hear? I had a hard enough time living down that Christmas lights incident. They think I'm a proper widow woman, and I don't want them to have any reason to think otherwise, so you high-spirited members of the party be sure and act like you got some smart!
As for the question of attention from the Plum, rest assured, she's an equal opportunity puppy. She will hang out mostly with those who have food in their hands, but will visit everyone at least once during the evening. Fun Girl, she'll give you special attention if you have carrots. Very kind of you to bring them, by the way. Mavis, it won't bother her that you're a dog groomer. She'd probably sit still if you wanted to practice your art on her.
I'm really looking forward to the evening, but are we talking about tomorrow night, or Saturday? Either will work for me, I just need to be prepared. As I said, I have loads of room for everyone. Big old house, raised my family here.
Well, off I go to bed. Sugarplum says hey! --Romeena

September 05, 2002 - Msg 8822: Hot dog! I would rather go to Romeena's house but I guess I better not bring my Whoopie Cushion since she's a respectable widow woman. Friday or Saturday would be fine with me, but could we please, please go to the duck pond and scare people afterwards???- Boo
PS-I'll bring the ham! HaHaHa

September 05, 2002 - Msg 8823: A movie at Romeena's?? All right. I will be there and bring us some mozzarella pizza. Asa, I'll pick you up hon. Just watch it on the Brylcreem this time OK? And yall we will all have to pitch in and help hide the cider from Asa. Liked to have never got him down off that roof with the Christmas light incident. I just hope that Romeena aint got any cows or we will be in trouble. And I cant wait to meet the Plum either. Yall have a good night I gots to get up at 5 in the morning. But I'll leave some coffee on the porch for ya. Nite--Salty Dog

September 05, 2002 - Msg 8824: Hey Boo you snuck in on me. Whatcha wanna go to the duck pond at night for?? You cant see any ducks. tee hee-SD

September 06, 2002 - Msg 8825: Thank you to all of you for the kind birthday wishes. I appreciate them very much.
Your fishfriend,

September 06, 2002 - Msg 8826: Mornin' y'all! Salty,don't ya let Boo con you into going down to the duck pond with him-he don't wanna see any ducks.He wants to scare all the folks out there with their sweethearts.Myself,I don't wanna open that can of worms! Never know who we might happen upon-y'all heard what was going around about poor Myra Koontz haven't ya? Don't wanna scandalize anyone out there by the duck pond.I'm sure Boo will talk Asa into "duck ponding" it,but Salty you're too smart a gal to fall for that! Yep,y'all bring those skillets to Romeena's cause Boo & Asa are getting geared up for mischief. I stopped in the drugstore yesterday and noticed there was NO brylcreme on the shelves-Uh Oh! Hope you scotchguarded your truck seats Salty!
Romeena,we usually head out to the picture show on Sat.nights,so we'll make it then if it's ok with you.
Well,Friday at last.If y'all are like me you need a sugar rush this morning,so here's 5 boxes of Krispy Kreme for everyone this morning.Enjoy!
possum under a rock

September 06, 2002 - Msg 8827: Good morning porch!! YUMMY thank tou so much for those Krispy Kremes Poss, they were good. I left a pot of coffee too. Gotta big day today, after work I gotta go to get all purtied up for the shin dig tonight at Romeenas. I caint wait. Just hope that certain people behave themselves. He Ro, I'm gonna bring a plate of them little sandwiches too. See yall tonight!!-Salty Dog

September 06, 2002 - Msg 8828: Mmmmorning Porch! MMmm KrispyKremes! Thanks Possum! I'm rushing this am, but wanted to check in - been very busy. Will catch you all up at Romeena's (I promise not to talk durring the movie).

~ Mrs. Wiley
"Is that you? Sure smell pretty! Like a gardenia blossom. You smell pretty enough to take to a picture show - zazz zoo zazz!"

September 06, 2002 - Msg 8829: Good Morning All!
I love the smell of Krispy Kremes in the morning! I hope I can sneak an invite to the picture show at Romeena's. If'n y'all let me come I promise to bring a big bowl of fresh popped popcorn. I'll bring lot's of napkins too. I like my popcorn buttery! And all this talk about going to the "duck pond"? Shame on you, Boo! When I was younger the boys called it "going to watch the submarine races". (I never did figure out where the submarines were!)
Have a great day,
Mary Wiggins

September 06, 2002 - Msg 8830: I hate to tell you this, Romeena, but I was watching the boy change the marquee earlier, and he's got it posted that TKAM is showing both Friday and Saturday night at your house. I'm as sorry as I can be, but I guess you'll have company both nights! I think Fun Girl's got enough baby carrots to swing it though. Salty, you're bringing a plate of finger sandwiches? Why, there ain't enough meal there to... get skinny on! I'll bring some Green Beans, Chinese Style. I got lots of green beans from the garden.
- Hazel

Just what can you do with a grown woman?

September 06, 2002 - Msg 8831: Mary, we was posting at the same time. Of course you're invited to the function at Romeenas. I think there's a group going tonight and tomorrow night too. Just let us know, and somebody will be by to pick you up!
- Hazel

September 06, 2002 - Msg 8832: Laaawwww! Both nights? Now that sounds like fun! The Plum and I love company, and I've got the tea and Pepsi to swing it. Need to make another batch of cookies though, and get some more popcorn. Salty, those little sandwiches sound good. I like little sandwiches. Mary, naturally you're invited. When we have a "do" around here, everyone's invited. That extra-buttery popcorn sounds great. I'll make mine a little drier for those who shouldn't eat so much butter.
Oh, somebody needs to swing by and pick up Tom. Hazel, could you do that? Thanks, dear. And those green beans sound extry good!
The Plum is all excited about the party. She asked me if I could color her pink early, rather than waiting for the holidays, but I don't think I'm gonna have time. Besides, I can't decide if I want to make her pink or lavender. Maybe we can take a vote while everyone's here.
Well, gotta get busy. Lots to do - dust, vacuum, sweep the porch and driveway, make tea, just busy, busy! Have a great day, see you all tonight! Sugarplum says hey, and come early!--Romeena

September 06, 2002 - Msg 8833: Oh, Fun Girl, I just realized that you're picking Hazel up. Would you mind getting Tom also? Thanks, love! --Romeena

September 06, 2002 - Msg 8834: Thanky Salty for the ride offer. Thought I was gonna have to hitch a ride to Ro's house. I went easy with the brylcream but Floyd did douse me with an ample supply of O.D. cologne. He didn't trim the hair on my ears though, so MAVIS, will you do it? I get kind of self conc...consi...conch... I get kind of worried what people think of me.
While on the subject, my wiener dog for the first time in 10 years has growed his hair on his back quite long, longer than I have ever seen it. Is that some kind of knowledge he has about a hard winter coming? Anyone know? I've heard of bugs and stuff doing it but not puppy's. He never has before. Just curious.
Can't hardly contain myself till tonight. We gonna have us a good old time. That Romeena knows how to throw.... knows how to host an event. It's pure gala.:)


September 06, 2002 - Msg 8835: Afternoon Y'all! TWO nights of fun? Oh mercy me! Don't know if I can make it tonight(I am one tired possum) but I will be at Romeena's Saturday night with bells on! Since her tea ain't sweet,how 'bout I'll bring a big jug of cold sweet tea? Salty what's in them little sandwiches? Asa's got all kinds of weird allergies-don't want something to set him off to scratchin' or something! Might be kinda annoying during the dramatic parts of TKAM to have Asa sitting there scratchin' like a fleabitten dog.Check with Mrs. Asa on what he can and can't have before you pick him up ok?
Y'all act like somebody over at Romeena's tonight and I'll be there for Round 2!
possum under a rock

September 06, 2002 - Msg 8836: Happy birthday to Mary Grace. Hugs to you Jo, if you're out there somewhere. You're missed.

September 06, 2002 - Msg 8837: Hey, Ya'll! Lookin' forward to tonight. I pulled out my werewolf Halloween mask and plan on doin' some damage at the duck pond. Just imagine sneakin' up on two lovers and growlin' in the window! Who's with me?--Boo

September 06, 2002 - Msg 8838: only if you proise to go cow-tipping too. . .Boo!

brought to you by Opie, leadng newspaper man and snazzy dancer

September 06, 2002 - Msg 8839: Beng a newspaper man - I do believe I need to proofread! That should be "promise" Boo!

brought to you by Opie, leading newspaper man and snazzy dancer - not to mention the first one to sit down during Miss Crump's Spelling Bee!

September 06, 2002 - Msg 8840: possum I believe Asa carries a note in his pocket listing his allergies, so we should be alright. Asa I'll brang my scissors with me & we can clip yer ears before the show starts. Mary will you be sure to keep an eye on Boo during the show, sounds like there may be some slippin off & heading to the duck pond whilst nobody is lookin goin on. Ro I'll brang paper plates, cause I don't want to do no dishes. If that is alright with you that is. Plum I'll go by my sister & mother's pet shop & get you a pig ear, my kids LOVE those, only thing they fight over.

September 06, 2002 - Msg 8841: Asa make sure Floyd puts lots of Witch Hazel on you, lots of people love the smell of Witch Hazel

September 06, 2002 - Msg 8842: Hey you all ought to call Goober to go with you to the duck pond. He could entertain you by "going off" on Cary Grant. I will go along just to keep the fellas in line. I'll get Big Maude to go with me as she will be able to handle things if the situation should get ugly. Opie, I thought you pa and Aunt Bee raised you better than to go scarring folks down at the duck pond. But all in all you are a good boy, so I guess we can overlook this little episode.

See ya all at Ro's tonight! I'm bringing a big crock pot full of hot cheese dip and a bunch of chips and we can all have nachos. And of course a case of ice cold Coca Cola on the house.
NO ASA, THAT DOES NOT MEAN THAT YOU CAN GO OUT ON THE ROOF AGAIN AND DRINK YOUR COKE UP THERE. We are gonna keep you feet on the ground if it's the last thing we do.

See ya tonight!

fun girl
Sure, I will pick up Tom on my way. Hazel and me would love the company. I am bringing an extry big bag of carrots tonight. Ro, you can keep the leftovers and Plum will have a snack for Saturday night too.

I had put the name of the nacho chips I am bringing in my message and it starts with Tos and ends with os, but the censor caught it and I aint allowed to put it in there.

September 06, 2002 - Msg 8843: My stars! It's a wonder the neighbors haven't called the police! You folks that didn't make it here tonight don't know what you're missing, but I'll bet tomorrow night will be just as much fun. I never saw so much activity in one place in all my borned days. The laughing and hee-hawing is enough to wake folks three streets away. Just does my heart good to see folks having such a good time. The Plum is in heaven, all those laps to choose from, and folks just slipping her treats right and left. The carrot-crunching alone is downright scary. She'll be moanin' and groanin' all night, with her little tummy too full.
Asa and Boo have disappeared, I'm afraid they're over at the duck pond, scaring folks. Tom said he saw them leave, they asked him to go, but he was comfortable where he was, so he's still here. There's no telling what those two owlhoots are up to. Hope Barney doesn't find them, and run them in.
Well, gotta get back to the party. I'll see the rest of you tomorrow night, I hope. Sugarplum says hey! --Romeena

September 06, 2002 - Msg 8844: Did everyone like the Baked Alaska I brought to Romeenas party? That's that new desert that came out since it became a state.
- Hazel

September 06, 2002 - Msg 8845: hehe That's dessert, not desert.

September 07, 2002 - Msg 8846: Hazel, that Baked Alaska was scrumptious. Guess I'll save a strip tomorrow, just won't check my blood sugar, I know it's gonna be sky-high. Couldn't resist that dessert, though. Yum! We just had all kinds of good food - mozzarella pizza, finger sandwiches, popcorn, sweet tea, Chinese green beans, lawww, I can't name it all. So good!
Sure wish we'd hear from Boo and Asa, though. Mrs. Asa and Beulah left here looking for them, with those skillets just a swooshin' through the air. I've been listenin' for a clang, but haven't heard one. Guess they haven't found the boys yet.
Mavis, thanks for bringing the paper plates. Sure is making the clean-up easier. Sugarplum offered to wash the dishes, but I know what her idea of THAT is, so was glad for the paper plates. Some folks are still eating, and they're running TKAM through again to catch up on things they missed. I think everyone really enjoyed it. I know I did.
Well, have a good weekend, friends, and I'll see the second wave tomorrow night. Anybody that was here tonight and wants to come back, why just come on! --Romeena

September 07, 2002 - Msg 8847: Mornin porch, ohhh I have a headache....Satyed up too late trying to get Asa and Boo out of the duckpond. Finally got them out and they started discussin goin to the hospital and takin bolts off the beds. Ro, are you sure that you and the plum are up to all this again?? I am off to work now. It sure was a blast--Salty Dog

September 07, 2002 - Msg 8848: Morning Porch, WOW sounds like you all had a fine time! Ro, hope you are up for it again tonight - I'm gonna wear my $11 dress, and I'll bring some pretzels (not much lays on my chest). Possum, I'll pick you up if you and your rock need a ride. Who elst is coming tonight?

I had to work in Tampa yesterday - the owners rented an office there to hold investor meetings. I 'pretended' to be a receptionist, but my actual function was 'waitress'. Oh my the lies and half-truths I heard... made me sick. They can lay people off, and overwork the rest, but there's money enough for a pretend office and rental furniture and expensive lunches and dinners. GRRR! And to start the day off, someone backed into my car as I was leaving the apartment complex. Only dimpled the quarter panel, and cracked the paint. I think I can push back in the cowling in the wheel-well. Reckon Goober can do some body work for me? I always thought of him as a carborator kinda guy, but maybe he's good w/paint too.

Can't wait to relax with the Plum in my lap and good friends about. Y'all are the CATS!

~ Mrs. Wiley

September 07, 2002 - Msg 8849: Sorry I didn't make it to the showing - we all ended up in bed at 8 o'clock. It was one long 4 day week!


September 07, 2002 - Msg 8850: Good morning All! Romeena, I just love what you've done with your place! Did you just get that gold shag carpet in? Man, is that sharp looking. And your whole kitchen done in that new avocado green color! When my refrigerator moans it's last moan I'm going to rush right out and get me an avocado green refrigerator!
Mavis, I did keep an eye on Boo. He thought he snuck out unseen during that part where Jem was showing all his treasures he found in that tree to Scout, but I saw him and Asa sneaking out the back door! I couldn't BELIEVE those two. Right to the duck pond they went. And Boo with that mask! All I could do was laugh when one poor girl jumped out of the car and started running in so much fear. She ran right into the pond! She was soaking wet. Then her boyfriend set after Asa and Boo but they must have been track stars 'cause they got clean away! After that I don't know where they went 'cause they were too fast for me too. I just went back to Ro's and then I got to entertain Plum for a while. I sure had a fun time!
Mary Wiggins
"He's a nut!"

September 07, 2002 - Msg 8851: Oh, by the way, I'll be back tonight! I wouldn't miss round two for the world!
Mary Wiggins

September 07, 2002 - Msg 8852: Well, even though I went to Romeenas last night, I'm going again tonight. I wasn't able to watch most the show, because someone, who shall remain nameless, kept talking about a dog they had as a kid. It seems the dog had 2 names, one of which was Shep (or was it Sport?). Well, their house caught fire and Shep went next door without giving a sound of warning. So I didn't get to see a lot of the movie. I'll be back tonight. I'm bringing spaghetti. I have a secret sauce.
- Hazel

September 07, 2002 - Msg 8853: Can't hardly wait myself. I didn't gp to no duck pond though. I went and played in the pool. Fell asleep in there in fact.
The reason you didn't see much of the movie was because you had that lampshade on yer head Hazel. Then you kept wanting us to guess your wattage.
And Mary Wiggins had that blonde wig on and was dancing all night.
Mavis kept drinking them rootbeers cause they make bubbly wubbly all over.
Possum kept singing Do wah diddy dont daddy do.
FunGirl hogged the Plumster all night. Never did see Homemaker.
Mrs. Wiley will be there tonight and I hear she knows how to party hardy. WooooHoooo.


September 07, 2002 - Msg 8854: Hello all! Have a great Mayberry day everyone. I'll bring some malberry squeezings over to Romeena's tonight. See ya' then.

Briscoe Darling Jr.

September 07, 2002 - Msg 8855: Hey! I got to read yesterday but not post. Wanted to thank possum for the sugar in the morning. Ol' Charlotte she's gotta have her sweets in the mornin'! I thought the picture show was gonna be tonight! Romeena, I thought you said Saturday night picture show! Did I miss it? I want to go! Did Hazel say she's comin' back tonight? If she is, so am I. I'll bring my bongos and the pizza pie.
Charlotte Tucker

September 07, 2002 - Msg 8856: I reckon Asa got ahold of something last night he shouldn't have eaten cause he's hallucinating! I,possum,was NOT at Romeena's last night! Was all worn out from a rough 4 day week (I feel your pain,homemaker!) and was under my rock at the time all these hijinks took place! He thinks he heard me singing,y'all,and I wasn't there! Oh what are we gonna do with that fella?
Sounds like night #1 was REAL interesting! I'll be there tonight Romeena with a jug of sweet tea and Asa's bongos.If he starts cutting up we'll just stick him in a back closet and let him bongo away!
P.S. Hazel,you are too funny!Bye the way, I hppen to have a brother-in-law named Shep-and no, he ain't a dog! He's a human critter!
See y'all tonight!
possum under a rock

September 07, 2002 - Msg 8857: I bought some new fiddle faddle for tonites shindig! I think Asa was the one in the lampshade - he likes them fringy things that hang down. I think it reminds him of when he had hair! :) By the way - I'll bring some DET Mt. Dew - it will tickle your innards!


September 07, 2002 - Msg 8858: That should be DIET - my computer is blitsing in and out again!


September 07, 2002 - Msg 8859: Yes, Charlotte, I'm going to Romeenas again tonight. Get ready, I'll be by to pick you up. Are you going to wear earrings? I think I will. If the others don't, we'll sneak behind the bushes and take them off. See ya in a little bit. Don't forget the bongos. Possum, Asa was a little gassed last night, so I'm not surprised that he thinks he saw you. He sees pink elephants and invisible dogs sometimes too. Bless his heart.
- Hazel

September 07, 2002 - Msg 8860: Homemaker, we was posting at the same time, didn't see you. I'll see you at the party too!
- Hazel

"I'm dead sober, Andy, but I expect I'll get over it."

September 07, 2002 - Msg 8861: Dang It! Looks like I'll NEVER get to see TKAM!Y'all won't believe what happened tonight... I got over to Romeena's,decided to come in the back door since I had that jug of ice tea & I wanted to put it in the fridge before heading into the living room with the rest of y'all.Well, who was in your kitchen Romeena,but(you guessed it) Asa and Boo. They were plundering through your pots & pans.I thought it was ill-mannered of them to be snooping around in your things so I hollered (y'all probably didn't hear me out in the living room with all that popcorn munching going on)at those fellers to stop and next thing I know Asa grabs Romeena's colander -(you know the big shiny silver one,Romeena?) slaps it on his noggin and high tails it out the back door with Boo hot on his heels yelling "Come Back Mr. McBeeVee!"
I just turned around and went back home and crawled back under my rock.It was more than I could stand.Guess I'm gonna have to read the book(TKAM) since I never get to see the picture!
Anyway,I WAS there Romeena and I thank you for inviting me.Sorry I didn't make it into the living room with all the gang,but I did manage to set down that jug of sweet tea in your kitchen! Help yourselves!
possum under a rock

September 07, 2002 - Msg 8862: Well! So that's where that jug of sweet tea came from. I found it, and was wondering who brought it.Possum, dear, you should have stayed. We had a real nice time. Got a little wild, what with BDJ bringing the mulberry squeezings, but it sure went down smoooooth! Asa and Boo came back after a while, and later I found my colander in the sink with a big dent in one side, so I suspect that Mrs. Asa caught up with them somewhere and cleaned their clocks. Boo kept mumbling something about losing his mask, and also something about never wanting to see another duck as long as he lives.
All in all, it was a fun time! We'll have to do it again sometime. Sometime later. Maybe next year. (:-)Sugarplum is ready to do it again tomorrow. Says she never saw so many laps, or ate so many carrots, or had so much fun in all her life. She's a regular party puppy, even thought it was funny when Fun Girl tied the balloon to her tail and it lifted her three feet off the floor! She was asking me if we could put her harness on and tie more balloons to it, and she could go flying all over the house.
Well, the dishwasher is humming, the house is straightened up, and I'm ready to turn in. Have a lovely Sabbath, friends. Sugarplum says hey! --Romeena

September 07, 2002 - Msg 8863: Glad to hear that the Plum enjoyed the little balloon ride. Hey I just had a great idea. Maybe we could sell balloons with the AD2Ks. Then as people were relaxing theirselves they could float and get a good view of their surroundings. Just an idea. Some of us would need more balloons that others to get aloft. As for the bash are Ro's, let me say a good time was had by all. I believe a body could get used to a dash of those mulberry squeezings every once in a while. I had a powerful headache but you know what they say about the hair of the dog. Come on over BDJ. I believe I could use another belt of them things. Oh by the prevent gossip about my imbibing, could you pour the squeezings into a Colonel Harvey's Elixer Bottle? If you can't find a bottle, go over to Andy's, I think Aunt Bee has an empty bottle in the cabinet next to the kerosene cucumbers. Hurry now, I need them squeezings powerful bad.
Now you all know why I am such a.....
fun girl

September 08, 2002 - Msg 8864: Good Sabbath Porch Pals! What a night - I just love TKAM, don't you? Plum sure enjoyed sitting on my velvet dress. I'll bet Mr. Goss will have a number of clothes come in tomorrow covered in dog hairs. And when BDJ and the boys get t'playin' music, I just can't help but dance. I better get some foot powder. Hazel, that spagetti was somekindagood! What's your secret? (as if I couldn't guess)

I don't see anybody up yet... I told you guys to ease up on them squeezin's! Romeena, thank you for such a lovely time. I'll come over today and help clean up the yard, Asa and CT and HM and me didn't realize that line dancing could be so destructive! Hee hee, I'm gonna have fun seein who's holding their heads at Preachin'.

~ Mrs. Wiley

September 08, 2002 - Msg 8865: I think the preacher will think I am a pillow head because it is going with me to church - I'll put a pretty ribbon on it and everyone will think it is my new fall hat. I always did like making a fashion (or fashion-less) statement.
Thanks for the fun evening Plum and Romeena - we'll have to do it again - real (cough, cough) soon.


September 08, 2002 - Msg 8866: Boy oh boy Romeena, you da woman. You sure do know how to host an event. What a gracious host you are. And the plumster is just a delight.
That was good cooking Hazel and them squeezins from Bricoe was wild like. I think Homemaker over did it though. She road one of her goats home, silly girl.
Mrs. Wiley, you are quite the line dancer I must say. You wern't one of them rockette's in an earlier time were you?
Well gotta get ready for some NFL action today. The start of a new season, I as so excited.


September 08, 2002 - Msg 8867: Hello friends! Thanks for a swell party, Romeena. I'm glad everyone liked my squeezins. Fun Girl, I'll make an extra batch of squeezins jus' fer ya'. Getting ready for football too.

Briscoe Darling Jr.
Hey ta':
Fun Girl
An' everyone!

September 08, 2002 - Msg 8868: Hello Porchsters! I have taken a breather from our busy life to let you all know that we are alive and well. We have been so busy with work and the field harvest is in full swing here. Hubby and I don't see each other too much and the children are in school. I sure miss the family times. Time to make some changes. Maybe a softball game this afternoon will help, and a little lemonade... come on by, the new porch is ready and waiting for company to drop in...~New Neighbor

September 08, 2002 - Msg 8869: Glad to see you back NN - we was wondering how ya were and if we needed an APB (that's an all points bulletin you know!) out on you.
Make sure you have plenty of lemonade - that sounds like it could hit the spot on a warm afternoon like today! It's around 90 degrees here!


Asa - quit making fun of my goat riding. . .transportation is transportation, and it is better than getting brylcream all over my nice new clothes! You didn't even notice that I had on a new outfit! Sniff, sniff

September 08, 2002 - Msg 8870: Hey Porch,

A couple years ago, there was talk on here and the digest about a restaurant named The Front Porch, and they sold glasses with that name on it. Some folks here would by two,keep one for themselves, and send the other on to a friend, and try to keep it going. I stopped by that place to eat on our way to Mayberry Days one year, but don't remember where it is now. All I know, is it is in SC somewhere on the way to Mt. Airy. If anyone knows where it is located, please post it here. I am headed to Mayberry Days in a few weeks, and I would like to stop there and buy some glasses.

Hope everyone is having a great day, and let's all remember all the unfortunate folks who parished a year ago this Wed. in NY, Penn., and in Washington, D.C. May they all rest in peace.


September 08, 2002 - Msg 8871: REDSKINS! WON!! (I'll let ya'll guess where that post came from! teehee) Where is *Rafe I need to tell him my 'skins won, he likes it when I tell him that!

September 08, 2002 - Msg 8872: Emmett, there is a little mall coffee shop in Sioux Ciy Ia. by that name. If I get there before MD, can I get something for you?

September 08, 2002 - Msg 8873: Congrats Mavis on your skins win. One of many for you I think. My boys in the silver and black, also sporting a new head coach made me proud.
Where has our Salty Dog and Hazel gotten off to. Ain't been seen or heard since the bash. Hope they is ok.
I noticed yer dress homemaker. Thought it looked fine on ya. Made of goatskin wasn't it. (hee hee)
Back to the game now.


September 08, 2002 - Msg 8874: Asa, Asa, Asa, that tweren't no blonde wig, that twer my HAIR! Honest, that's my story and I'm sticking to it! Well, you football fans, my silver and blue let me down again! I kinda expect it though. What were we last year? 2 and 11 or something, I really shouldn't try to remember. But, good old Pete won again! Felt bad for Andre though.
Possum, I just don't believe you let Asa and Boo scare you off like that! Next time why don't you ride with me and we'll give those two what for! I just got me a vintage motorcycle and I plan to put a side car on it. We'll arrive in STYLE!

Well you all have a good night sleep and tomorrow may the road rise to meet you and the wind be always at your back! God Bless,
Mary Wiggins

September 08, 2002 - Msg 8875: I wonder if I just asked God to bless Mary Wiggins? Well, why not!? God, please bless Mary Wiggins and everyone else here! Thank you Sir!
Mary Wiggins

September 08, 2002 - Msg 8876: Your a bird in this world Mary Wiggins. LOL


September 08, 2002 - Msg 8877: Mary are you an irishster? Sounds like it, I always liked the one that goes, may you be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows yer dead. Always made me laugh. Yes Asa my Skins are long overdue, we just ain't got over Joe Gibbs tradin football in for NASCAR. But I tell you cars or football, that man is one fine Christian man & such a role model for people. Have you got yer house back in order Ro? Hope so cause I want to come over next week to watch Wizard of Oz if that is ok with you & the Plum, ya'll are fine hostesses. Off to see how *Rafe's boys are doin, so far not so good.

September 08, 2002 - Msg 8878: Well friends, I am coming along fine after my hang ove...I mean my sinking spell earlier today. Maybe it had something to do with BDJ's special recipe for "mulberry syrup" and maybe it didn't. I ain't at liberty to say. I'd have him tell you all how to make it, but them we'd have to kill ya and we kinda hate to go that far. I reckon them squeez...I mean syrup is good enough that we could forgive him for going off and leaving us to think that he done fell of the R.E.Lee Natural Bridge, and made us drag the waters and ever thang. So what do you all think. I think he even beats the sisters medicinal recipe they made out in their hot house. What were their names? I know it wasn't the Baldwin Sisters, that was another show and it was color t.v. Somebody help me out here.

Gonna run and throw a load of clothes in the washer. Hugs to all.

A headache having, squeezing sipping, plumster pettin', dog tired....
fun girl