January 10, 2004 - Msg 18392: we'll have to check with floyd where the best place to launch our brown trucks from, i hear he's good at that. fun girl= we need you and homemaker to run our education up there. free shots, all the desserts our hearts desire. we'll all be like teenagers cruisin mars. spot we'll have to either wear bubble or bobble heads outside on mars. the( gonna to be cool again, cruisin the drive-ins & hang outs again) pipeman

January 11, 2004 - Msg 18393: wow the porch was swept so when i got up i was talking to myself and answeing myself. at least i wasn't arguing. breakfast== flap jacks, reg, chocalote chip, blueberry. homemade syrup, honey and sorgum. omlets of choice, country ham, bacon, sausage, and oatmeal. fresh fruit, juice, coffee, milk, tea. homemade biscuts. anytime till noon. lol everyone. pipeman

January 11, 2004 - Msg 18394: I'm on my way, Pipeman. I can't sleep anyway.
- Hazel

January 11, 2004 - Msg 18395: Thanks for breakfast pipeman! hope it doesn't lay on my chest.

~ Mrs. Wiley
"nothin' much lays on her chest!"

January 11, 2004 - Msg 18396: ok pipeman...give me two flapjacks...hm you [like pipeman said] run our school on mars..and ya say floyd can tell us where to launch from?..i think the mid west would be nice..well gona go and eat and nap...hey fg, hm.asa.fun girl.county nurse,jeb,goober,mayberry dep,possum, ,,man o man we have been missing a lot of people!..hey pipiman think the fishing will be any good on mars?..signed: Spot the "gona get his fishing pole ready for fishing on mars in the creator holes" talking dog of goobers !![got to dig worms]

January 11, 2004 - Msg 18397: spot= the fishing on mars will be so good you have to stand behind the tree and bait your hook. if you use a tow truck the fish will pull the truck in flop it twice and bye=bye truck. hope that answers that fer you.hazel & mrs wiley eat all you want and take some home in case you feel like lying around relaxing today. pipeman

January 11, 2004 - Msg 18398: attention all western tv fans== new western tv fan site== it's called welcome to north fork- home of the tv western. format much like here and bullitin board if your fan you can help build in the direction you'd like. you can pick out a name etc. mine is the gunsmith. go to western tv message board, find a listing and click on to welcome to north fork site then click on margie aka cowgirls rifleman site, it will bring you to site.YOU ONLY DO THIS ONCE AND YOU ARE ABLE TO GO DIRECTLY TO THE SITE ANYTIME. MULITIPLE PERSONALITIES. PIPEMAN

January 11, 2004 - Msg 18399: pipeman you are mulitlple personalities!! [ha ha]..gona cook us all fried pork chops,milk gravy,okra,greenbeans,boiled cabbage,cornbread,sweet tea,green onions,hot peppers,garlic salt,fresh ground black pepper..will be plenty yall come and get it at about 6:30...signed: Spot the "gona cook a real southern rib sticking meal for all" talking dog of the porch [southern end]..ruff ruff

January 11, 2004 - Msg 18400: Pipeman, that gravity on Mars is mighty strange. That bobble head is liable to just keep bobbling and bobbling.

Hope everyone is enjoying a fine, Mayberry kinda weekend.


January 11, 2004 - Msg 18401: thanks dess= knowing spots head will be like one of the dogs in the back of the50's car will be a comfort i'm sure. me i'm bobbonin along most of the time. will you ride the mars moped with me? tee=hee. pipeman

January 11, 2004 - Msg 18402: LOOK YALL...this head bobbing aint gona get it on the trip , gona have to get with the county nurse and get me a neck brace..whew..pipeman do you sence a lack of people on the porch?..signed: Spot the "where are yall at?" talking dog of the porch

January 11, 2004 - Msg 18403: well the porch is empty...fixing to leave the ole power company and go to my 12 yr olds basketball game ..yall take care and eat plenty!.signed: Spot the "gona go to mars but to the basketball game first" talking dog of the southern end of the mayberry porch..ruff- pant.

January 11, 2004 - Msg 18404: spot its easy to se you are a southern born pup by looking at your menu porkchops,okra , corn bread yummy
mayberry deputy

January 11, 2004 - Msg 18405: Well, finally! I sure have missed you folks. Have you ever noticed how a simple coincidence can just mess things all up for you? Last Tuesday, I was installing a more powerful surge protector on my 'puter, and happened to tug a little on the cables going to the processor. Well, next thing I noticed was that my DSL wasn't working. The natural assumption was that I had interrupted it somehow, or had set up a line wrong somewhere. So, I spent two days trying to figure out what was wrong. Turns out, it wasn't that at all. Apparently at the same time, an installer somewhere was setting someone else up with a new DSL, and found my pair of lines, didn't hear anything on them (mine are dedicated, no phone involved), so he deduced that they were unused and used them. Voila! Instant dead DSL for me. When I finally gave up trying to fix it myself, and "called the man", it got solved. This same thing happened about three years ago, so I told "the man", and he followed up that hint, and sure enough. So, now I'm back on line, and very happy to be there.

As for this trip to Mars, I think I'll stay home with the Plum. She's not much for space exploration, unless it's the back recesses of my closet. She does love to poke around in there. Anyway, you all go on and make the trip and we'll stay home. Just give us a call when you're headed back this way, and we'll have supper waiting for you. How's that?

Sugarplum says hey! --Romeena

January 11, 2004 - Msg 18406: Evenin' Y'all. Been under my rock for the past week sick with bronchitis.Just wanted to pop in and say hello.
Guess I'll turn down the honor of being the first possum on Mars and stay right here on planet Earth! Send me a postcard though! Ha!
Well,gotta go for now.Y'all take care!
possum under a rock

January 11, 2004 - Msg 18407: Hope you feel better soon, Possum.

I believe I'll stay here on planet earth and keep Romeena and Plum company, but thanks for the invitation.

I just returned from the prayer retreat and I have to say I had a marvelous time. It was very "Mayberry". There was even a big porch with two swings and rocking chairs over-looking the lake, and I spent alot of my time out there. The weather was perfect (cool and crisp but very chilly at night). The first night I sat out on that deck and saw the most beautiful full moon on the lake. It was just a gift from God! I had wonderful fellowship with my closest friends and it was just wonderful. We did alot of praying and I did hear from the Lord on some things. Thanks for your prayers, friends. You are very dear to me.


January 11, 2004 - Msg 18408: Hey to the porch,
Get better quickly, possum.
Sounds like a great experience, Boo.
Hope everyone has a good week.

Ky Moonshiner

January 12, 2004 - Msg 18409: Well, welcome back Romeena and Boo! I'm glad both of you found your way home.;)

Wasn't there a discussion here a while back on weird ways of eating things or something like that? Well I just wanted to tell you that I've started my own weird eating habit recently. I discovered that I could save on dirtying up a spoon when eating those snack pack puddings by using a banana and dipping it in there. That way I don't have to eat the pudding and a banana separately, I do it all at once! It's actually pretty good! It's kind of like a banana split without all the bells and whistles.
Chocolate is my favorite. ...Pudding, I mean! They don't make chocolate bananas. But I wish they did now that I've said that! It sounds pretty good too!
-Sterling Holobyte

p.s. Hope you get better soon, Possum!

January 12, 2004 - Msg 18410: good morning one and all== rise and shine it's 2 am.... that always felt good to say. ky moonshiner== good to see you back again. can you fix spot and i some special r4ocket fuel for the brown trucks? we're all on our way to mayberry only mars and moon colonies. sterling== have you thawed yet? get some hershey syrup, finely ground nuts, jar of cherries, and banana's, dip them and you have it. possum== hope you feeling better soon. how about going to mayberry moon colony? boo== the mayberry moon and mars choirs can't sing without you as there leader. you know how we need our hymas. romeena==that's our luck too. it's the simple things, one in a million shot except the lottery we always win. how about the mayberry moon colony? plum could be the first to bark on the moon instead of at it. pipeman

January 12, 2004 - Msg 18411: Guess I better crank up the fire, gonna need quite a bit of "juice" to get to Mars, I bet.

Ky Moonshiner

January 12, 2004 - Msg 18412: mdc here, crawling out from under a rock!
Had the creepin stomach crud this weekend.
Sure dashed all my plans. prayers appreciated.
headin back under the covers for a while.
I guess it's my punishment for callin8 the bronw truck names!! (ha) seeya all later

January 12, 2004 - Msg 18413: 'Mornin, all! pipeman, we might be persuaded to go on that moon ride, but not to Mars. Too far away. The Plum kinda likes the idea of barking ON the moon, though. How long do you think we'll be gone?

Boo, that retreat sounds heavenly. I've been on several prayer retreats, but none were held in such a lovely place. Sounds like it was easy to get yourself into the proper frame of mind.

Anybody got any suggestions on how to get a streak-free, water-repellent finish on glass? Everything I've done in my backyard has been geared toward critter-friendly, and LOW maintenance. Well, critter-friendly I've got. Low maintenance is another matter. This big wonderful window behind my desk gives me a panoramic view of the whole back yard, but I just can't get it clean! It's streaky, and when spray from the sprinkler system blows toward it, it waterspots terribly. So far, I've tried Windex, vinegar, and Rain-X. I've polished with paper towels, newspapers, commercial shop cloths, rags and coffee filters. Still streaky, still waterspotted. It faces south, and at this time of year the sun is low enough that it hits the window almost all day. You know how your windshield can look really clean, until you're facing the sun and then you can't see through it? Same thing. Early morning and late evening are fine, but through most of the day, the streaks and spots are really evident, and very annoying. I'd call the man, but I don't know what man to call. Any suggestions will be welcomed and tried. Thanks, folks!

Now I need to get busy. All my Christmas decorations are still up, and I guess it's time to take them down. Asa, were you planning to help me get the lights off the roof? Sugarplum says hey! --Romeena

January 12, 2004 - Msg 18414: Yes, Ro, time for the Christmas decorations to come down. I know I've mentioned the site before but if you haven't checked it out, do so. It's flylady.net. She is a home organizer who will send you these little daily reminders to do things around the house. I really love it. But even if you don't sign up, she has some fun things on her web site. Anyway, what made me think of her is that she sent an email last week saying "if you haven't taken down the Christmas decorations yet, it is time to do so!"
Have a great day. It's nice here today real nice.
Charlotte Tucker

January 12, 2004 - Msg 18415: Yes, Ro, the retreat was pretty heavenly. Wish I could sit and look at that lake everyday. It was so peaceful and quiet out there away from everything and even with a full moon, it was so dark at night with no lights from the city and you could see millions of stars.

I wish I knew something you could put on your window. This sounds crazy, but I am wondering about some kind of car polish that repels water. Turtle wax or something. I don't think it streaks and it might prevent the water spots.

Better go tend to my little sweet angels!


January 12, 2004 - Msg 18416: Boo, get you some "Rain-X", available at any auto parts store. You literrally don't need windshield wipers if you use this stuff! It's probably also at your local fillin' station.

~ Mrs. Wiley

January 12, 2004 - Msg 18417: oops, didn't see Ro's post above. Ro, sounds like your sprinkler uses some hard water there? I still like Rain-X (but it ain't no VICKS). ~ Mrs. Wiley

January 12, 2004 - Msg 18418: HEY PORCH,
How is everyone? FUNGIRL, I've been in Las Vegas for about 2 1/2 years. I am originally from Alabama but spent 11 years in Los Angeles before moving here. I haven't heard anything about a slot machine incident but that probably happened before I got here. There is always someone out here trying to find a way to beat the ODDS. They don't built BILLION DOLLAR casinos by people winning I'll tell you that. But people still believe and try. Glad to see everyone is doing well. Back to work for me. Take care and have a great Mayberry Kinda Day!

Ed Sawyer

January 12, 2004 - Msg 18419: Thanks, Mrs. Wiley. Actually, I've used Rain-X. I use it on the car windshield, and you're right, the rain just skitters right off and quite often you don't even need to turn on the wipers. I've cleaned this window with it, too, and I just can't seem to get the streaks polished out. Maybe I put it on too heavily.

Charlotte Tucker, I think you're the one who put me onto Flylady a long time ago. I've been there, and I get her hints and reminders. You're right, it's really helpful. I especially like her theory about the shiny sink. She's so right. When the kitchen sink is shiny, it motivates you to keep the rest of the kitchen clean, too. I love the five-minute hot spot thing, too. It's amazing what just five minutes here and there can do to keep the house looking neat and tidy. Of course, it's easy for me, since there's no one here but the Plum and I. She tends to scatter her toys, but when she sees me putting some away, she'll often pick up a couple and return them to her toybox, too. It's hilarious.

See you later. Everyone have a great day! Sugarplum says hey! --Romeena

January 12, 2004 - Msg 18420: ro=== asa, ed , sterling and i can shoot the lighs out then you will need to replace them later in year. how does that sound? spot & i can crash my little broen truck thru the window and put up plastic with duck tape and see if mrs wiley will loan us some vicks for the project. how does that sound? if women don't find you handsome they ought to find you handy. tee-hee. mdc== sorry your feeling poorly, star trek and i have had this in one form or another since christmas eve. we had flu shots. ed sawyer= hope you have a good one. whose cookin tonight? boo== that lake sounds beautifull, we'll take it to mars, water a little scarsce and we'll need some for baptising. charlotte tucker== star trek said thanks she'd check it out and tell me easier ways to do the honey can you do lists. so thoughtfull. tee-hee. the brown trucks say hello and is reving their engines for launch. just waiting for floyd to tell us when and from where. your pipeman

January 12, 2004 - Msg 18421: I HATE WORK! If there was a Mayberry out there, I would pack up and move. Holy Cow! A body shouldn't have to go through the horrors of work day in and day out. Somebody get out the checker board, apple cider, and the simple times cause I'm ready. Next time I see TAGS I'm liable to jump through the TV and hope I make it to the other side with Andy and the gang. ANYHOO, thanks for letting me vent. Take care all and keep my place on the porch ready. Mayberry Kinda Day's Forever!

Ed Sawyer

January 12, 2004 - Msg 18422: Ed Sawyer I agree with you I hate work too Im doing the redneck retirement plan ,playing the lottery, no luck so far but maybe some day
mayberry deputy

January 12, 2004 - Msg 18423: Sounds like your having yourself quite a Monday Ed. Sorry about that. Mine has been so good so far. Knock on wood. (tapping on my head)
Hey Ro, I gotta get my lights down too but they are buried under about three feet of snow so I can come and do yours first I reckon. Will the Plumster be available to help? Or at least be around for a few hugs? We are going to visit our new puppy tonight for a few. Still to young to take from Mama but give it a few more weeks and he comes home with us. Can't hardly wait. I fear he will be much spoiled. To bad! LOL
Where is our Mavis? I need her advice on something.
Hope you are having a better day than Ed.


January 12, 2004 - Msg 18424: Hey, Asa! You bet the Plum will be available for hugs. She loves hugs. I'll bet you're all excited to be visiting your new puppy, and I think you're very smart to do so. Visit him, play with him, leave something of yours with him (an old knotted sock?) - generally get him used to you. It will make the transition much easier for him when he's finally old enough. I know you can just hardly wait! Have you thought of a name for him yet?

I'm all excited about tomorrow night - my sister-in-law has some free tickets to hear Sarah Brightman in concert, and I'm going with her. It should be wonderful. I'm sure she'll do a lot of A.L. Webber's stuff - I love it!

Well, I got most of the stuff out of the yard, but the lights on the roof are still there. I think I'd prefer that you boys don't shoot them out - it makes a mess of broken glass to contend with. I'd rather just take them down in one piece, but thanks anyway.

Guess I'll scare up some leftovers for supper. There's plenty, so if anybody is in the neighborhood, come on by. Sugarplum says hey! --Romeena

January 12, 2004 - Msg 18425: hey guys and girls gona read the archives in the morning , just got done with a basketball game and got to rush rush rush, signed: Spot the "in a hurry" dog of the porch...will be on in the morning!

January 12, 2004 - Msg 18426: Got back from the doctor's a while ago. I have strep throat. I feel YUCKY! I have felt pretty good until yesterday. Aren't ya glad ya can't be infected by cyber germs on this porch?

I did not win the chili cookoff. I think it was rigged. (sour grapes) LOL I did great as far as sticking to what I can have on this diet. I am just so proud of myself.

Gonna go and check out the flylady web site. Heaven knows I could use some help getting my life organized.

Later friends,
fun girl

January 12, 2004 - Msg 18427: Hey to the porch! I watched a good episode on a local station today. The one where Mrs. Mendlebright evicted (that sounds like such a harsh word) Barney from his room for using that hot plate. That was a great one, although they always manage to cut out some of the best scenes.
"You better get yourself a ROOM!"

January 12, 2004 - Msg 18428: "Pa, Barney's face is bleedin'!"

January 12, 2004 - Msg 18429: Emma, I agree that's one of my favorite also. When Barney yells "SNOOP SNOOP" that just about kills me.

January 12, 2004 - Msg 18430: Hey All,
Thanks for the support on my venting about work. You work hard, you try to make a living and what do you get, HEARTACHES! I'm too young to be doing so much. Actually, the day finished better than it started so that's always a plus. I'm serious though, I need to find a nice quiet town and settle down. If it wasn't for TV LAND, A&E, and the western channel, I would yank my TV off the wall. WELL, that's about it. I'm going now. Good night all, take care, and have Mayberry Kinda Dreams!

Ed Sawyer

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18431: Ed, I hope you find what you're looking for! It's out there. You may have to give up the convenience of having everything close by but I think it is worth it! Even I'm looking to move to a town smaller than the little city of 8000 people I live in now. My little hometown is growing too much to suit me. I'd like the city to put up a sign at the outskirts of town that says, "Come and visit; have a good time; enjoy the scenery; and then leave!" Do you think they'll go for that, or is that too blunt? ;)
Everyone have a nice night, and Ed Sawyer have pleasant dreams!
-Sterling Holobyte

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18432: good morning one and all, lol== time to catch up. prayers for you fun girl- that chilli judge wouldn't know real chilli if it snuck up on them. i know how rough those health issues are. i have a lot of problems from agent orange, sometimes you feel fine then for a week or so your weak. mayberry deputy== since we haVE THE LOTTERY IN ILLINOIS, i hit cap button, i really loved the redneck retirement plan. good one. asa==i'm glad you'll soon have your new dog. like people you can't replace the loss just grow to love the next generation for themselves and their special characteristics. good morning emma& auh20= hope you have a great one. whose cooking breakfast and supper today? your pipeman

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18433: ed sawyer== those are my favorite tv channels also. if you like old tv westerns and this site, there is a new one built like here you might want to check out. 1. go to western tv message board (1st time only. 2. click on welcome to north fork== home of the tv western, scroll left side find message board.click on. after that you can go directly anytime we all choose a character, i'm the gunsmith thereand you can reg one if you want, we have 2 regulars from this site on it now. ed= i know the dilema your in you'd love to live in a small town but all the nice ones you can't make a living in, i've lived all over the world and my preference would be eastern or southwestern tennessee but there isn't a lick of real work to be had close by even in the best of times. maybe you'll win the redneck lottery and retire to a place like that, i pray so. MEANWHILE REMEMBER. YOU MAY HAVE TO GROW OLD BUT YOU DON'T HAVE TO MATURE. pipeman

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18434: sterling= that packers game was a heart breaker for the fans (one of our sons are a big fan) it will be like the foul ball 5 outs from cubs going to world series. it will be talked about for decades. i'm pulling for the colts superbowl not since johnnie unitis have tey had this good a shot. on the sign at the edge of town put; come visit date our citizens who are single and agreeable, drop all your money and leave town. is that being to blunt? tee-hee. pipeman

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18435: good morning spot==hope you have a goog one. when we launch our little brown trucks remember not to let anyone pick up or throw out the used fuel rods that ky moonshiner is making for us. if they do it's blewey little brown truck and all in it. pipeman

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18436: Fun girl, did you really put sour grapes in your chili?
No wonder it didn't win!
- Hazel

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18437: good morning hazel= hope you have a great week. have you heard from possum, county nurse, mpo, brisco darling, banjo jerry, there sure are a lot of folks still missing. pipeman

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18438: Haze, you're a HOOT! ~ Mrs. Wiley

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18439: hey all ..whats for supper?...pipeman when is our launch date?...signed: Spot the "hungry" dog of the porch ..haey fg,hm,mdc,county nurse,asa,possum..

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18440: That Hazel is really gifted with humor, isn't she? She's like poetry in motion. I think she should go down to the nursing home and take the bolts out of the wheelchairs. hehe

Hope you feel better soon fun girl. Get plenty of rest and drink lots of fluids and.........don't forget the VICKS!

Poor Ed. Sounds like you need a serious break from the rat race. I agree with Sterling. I am living in a town of about 10,000 and wish it was much smaller. I tried to take a walk with the kids yesterday and almost got run down but the speed demons! I had my 2 yr old in a wagon pulling her and they still blasted right past us. The town we are moving to is not any smaller the one we are in right now but I will be on my own 5 acres and I figure people can only crowd in so close.

Gotta go tend to the kids. Have a great day!


January 13, 2004 - Msg 18441: uh,...that should be "by the speed demons" of course.

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18442: Morning to the porch...took a bit to catch up on all the happenings! I couldn't get on yesterday...busy here at the fillin station...then Gilly stopped by with that car of his...all he knows is speed, speed, speed. It's a mess!
Hey Sterling...I like bannana's dipped in chocolate pudding...one of my Fav o rites!

See you all soon...making a new sign for "Goobers Martian Fillin Station!"


January 13, 2004 - Msg 18443: BOO, STERLING, PIPEMAN - Thanks for the kind words and advice. Pipeman, you're right. To make a living in a small town is a challenge so it looks like the larger city life will have to do until I retire. I'm only 38 so I've got few years left. Until then, I'll have to sit back in the rat race and think Mayberry thoughts (or continue to take long vacations). At least I have the porch to get me through :) High Ho High Ho you know the song. Take care all and have a Mayberry Kinda Day!

Ed Sawyer

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18444: Gosh, I know how you feel, Ed. I am 40 and we live on the outskirts of Corpus Christi. I would love to move to the Texas Hill Country (wonderful little small towns like Luekenbach) but my husband is a computer specialist and has to work in the city, so here we stay. Maybe after retirement we can move but by then I might not want to move away from the kids if they are settled here (what am I saying...of course I would move given the chance!).

I was confinding in a friend the other day that sometimes when I go to bed at night feeling stressed, I will imagine that I am in Mayberry visiting Aunt Bee and having coffee in her kitchen. We discuss the local gossip and exchange recipes, etc... she laughed but said that what she imagines at night is being married to a wonderful man (she is divorced) and having a secure, loving home and family. So, I guess we all have our ideals of what makes us feel secure and happy and for me that seems to be Mayberry. Funny, isn't it?

Better run. I am babysitting another 2 yr old and I can hear a toddler fight going on in the next room!


January 13, 2004 - Msg 18445: Whew, I'm back with the living!!!
I had a 24-48 hour thing that really made my head spin! Was down for the count yesterday. Thanks for the prayers!
fun girl- but there ARE computer viruses!! (ha)
hope your throat is better. You need some of barney's larnyx spray!
pipeman- sounds like you like the red-green show too. I think some of his "inventions" are side-
splitters. Oops, wrong analogy as i recover!
Didn't barney talk about his dad smoking a pipe in one episode?
Mary and Romeena- I think it's you two from Indiana, Go Colts! Too bad for green bay, that was indeed a toughie.
Our local channel is doing season 3 right now and also had on the one about Miss "Brendelmight."
"Barney, you're gassed!"
Does anyone know why, in season 3 they added the panels to the indoors lower part of the courthouse windows. They almost look like planters, but inside, and no plants!
Remember, we're all planning to meet one day in the Mayberry o the sky!
Mr. Darlin's, back amongst ya agin, Cuz

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18446: cheer up porch== in places like kentucky a lot of folks live in a small town and drive 2 or3 hours to work they say it's well worth it. spot= as soon as floyd let's us know when and where. if he doesn't as soon as ky moonshiner gets the rocket fuel mixed. we'll launch from one of the ladies houses, if it don't go well they will automatically relocate with us to a smaller town, blewy. how does that sound with everyone? just remember we're all in this together. i'll be pullin for us. and the brown trucks. your pipeman

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18447: mdc= we posted at the same time. glad your back amoung the living. yeah i like the red green show, old tv westerens, and mayberry. people in charge today don't know what a classic is pipeman

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18448: like i said whats fer supper?..busy here at the power company..signed: Spot the working dog of the porch

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18449: Spot, I do declare I think you have a rubber gut and a hollow leg. Boy, you are hungry all the time. LOL

It's homemaker and me (fun girl) who are from Indiana and I have never been much of a sports fan, but I must admit that I am pretty excited about the Colts. Has anyone ever heard the song that Payton Manning sang with Kenny Chesney? (Don't quit your day job, son.) Really cute. Not good, but cute. Payton is such a cutie! Much better than that little brat Jeff George we were so fortunate to get rid of years ago! Fungi, Kyle and I were in Cracker Barrel some years ago and there was a couple sitting next to us. Well Kyle was playing with the triangle game with the golf tees, you know. Anyway he dropped a golf tee and the man next to us picked it up and handed it to him. It was Marshall Faulk. Pretty cool, huh? I thought since he was so nice, we wouldn't bother him for an autograph.

My sister and family live in Berrien Springs, Michigan. Mohammad Ali lives in the small town. They went to the dentist one day. And while they were waiting for Konner to come out of the dentist, Mr. Ali went over to my nephew, Emory and picked him up. My sister said to his wife, "He doesn't know it, but one of these days he will tell his kids about this." And his wife said, "Yeah but right now he's thinking, who is this big black man who picked me up." I have a philosophy of why he picked Emory up. Emory was a tip toe walker for a long time. I read in Ali's biography that when he was a little kid he too was a tip toer. His family all called him Tippy.
My thoughts are that maybe he saw Emory and it brought back memories of his childhood or something. (Ah, maybe I am just too dramatic. Sounds like a good scene for a movie, huh? Anybody got any Hollywood connections? tee hee)
Anyway, the boys I mentioned are none other than my darling boys. Enjoyed a week with them at Christmas.

Hey possum, Rosa sends a big Hoosier Hello to Little Laci. She says, "We'll have to get together some time and share a cyber teething biscuit." How old is Laci now? Is she eating cereal or baby food or anything. I was thinking she and Rosa are pretty close in age. Rosa will be six months on the 22nd.

Gotta run.
Love to all.
fun girl

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18450: YEA i stay pretty hungry all the time...think i will whip up a pot of brunswick stew to eat tonight...grilled cheese sandwiches, pickles, sweet tea...yall come to the southern end and have some at about 6 or so .. the stew has to simmer...signed: Spot the " stay hungry all the time" dog of the porch..

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18451: Hey spot, for some reason I imagine Homer Simpson at his power co job when you mention yours!! (haha) Ah, I guess I AM feeling better.
Ok, I shoulda writ down my own idear!
(Homemaker and fun girl are from Indiana!)Thanks
pipeman-thanks for the well wishes.
As Briscoe Darling would say:
"That haircut of yourn may be city style,
but your heart is shaped in a bow."
Ed sawyer- them job problems can be like those women skeet shooters, they just sorta creep up on ya when you least expect!
(yes, i watched a few TAGS videos during my down day! After all, they say laughter is the best medicine!)
Eating toast and 7up today. may join ya all for dinner again tomorrow.
Mr D's Cuz

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18452: MDC"S...you got anything to eat?....my stew want be ready for a while...signed: Spot the "looking for a snack" dog of the porch

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18453: Sorry spot, only toast and 7 up.
My wife calls them "intestine resters."
And believe me, my poor intestines need restin'.
She's a good nurse, but not a REAL one, just plays one on TV. hee hee.

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18454: spot will send you a pizza over to tie you over to supper-just don't let mr burns, or lenny have any. grilled cheese sandwiches are hard to come by at resturants anymore, i like making my own, sometimes grilled ham and cheese with chips, chittlins, or pork ryans and dill pickles. fun girl== like they say you always meet those big shots with connections either on the golf course(even if it is cracker barrel) and the dentist office. who knows maybe mr tucker will be next or the govenor. mdc= hope your back on your feet soon . possum== are you hiding under your rock or up at possum lodge? check in we miss you. pipeman

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18455: Yo porch. How are you?
Sure do wish someone would turn up the heat on my end of the porch. Our highs are not even getting up to freezing. I feel like a naked chicken stuck in the freezer. Brrrr!


January 13, 2004 - Msg 18456: Asa - I hate to tell you but you look like a naked chicken stuck in the freezer! Ha
Well - we just saw another kid being delivered tonite - he's a looker - yep it was a boy!
Fun Girl - were you going to apply for that job or not - just don't put sopur grapes in my chili and I like spaghetti noodles instead of elbow macaroni. Not to spicy though! And I might just talk the special ed director into hiring you!

Well - back to farming!


January 13, 2004 - Msg 18457: asa= the heat will be turned up in july, i promise unless you go to mars the heat is on now. homemaker= go colts. mayberry quote; to think i voted for you sheriff. never considered anybody else. bad, bad, sheriff. pipeman

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18458: Poor Asa, it's mighty nice down here in S.Fla. - low 80's today. Supposed to get colder in a day or so though - all the way down to 60! (Mrs. W. ducks as a wad of tin foil is whipped her way) Looks like I got that dread cold thing now, too. Guess I lost the battle - durn that chewable C! Shoulda used VICKS.

Hey any of you nurses out there - will they postpone a surgery for a snotty nose? a low grade fever? After 10 years I'm FINALLY getting my shoulders taken care of - 1 side at a time - at the end of the month. Don't want anything to mess it up! Would be obliged iffin someone could let me in on the protocol.

~ Mrs. Wiley
Aunt Bea: "She was just my age..."

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18459: Hello all! Happy New Year! Hey ~Des~, I don't know how we lost touch with each other. I'm safe and sound. I'll be in touch in a couple of weeks. Time fer: "Slimmy River Bottom". And this time, make it 'purty. Here we go.

Briscoe Darling Jr.

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18460: ok..stews done ..and pipeman have ya ever had a grilled pb&j sandwich?...hey brisco!.fg.mrs wileyHM.Boo.Ro.,goober,asa,mary wiggins,county nurse,where is everybody, well in the morning yall get up early cause i got to be at the power company at 6 so breakfast[thick sliced bacon,hash browns.bisquits,gravy,coffee,toast,and OJ] will be ready early in the morning.hey just a note My black lab [otis 106 lbs.] got a bone hung up in his teeth two days ago, about 6 in long , had to put that rascal to sleep to get it out, $123.00.vet bill whew..but he"s a good one.signed: Spot the"$123.00 poorer dog cause of otis" dog of the porch

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18461: You put your black lab to sleep to get the bone out?! Gosh, that's kind of like cutting off your dog's nose to spite his face, isn't it? I mean, really! Killing your dog isn't exactly going to help him.
Just kidding, Spot, I know what you mean by "putting him to sleep." I was just funnin ya! ;)
-Sterling Holobyte

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18462: "..like a naked chicken stuck in the freezer." You have quite a way with words, Asa. Most of the time I feel like a dressed up pig stuck in the oven.


January 13, 2004 - Msg 18463: Evening Folks, still having computer problems which is making it tough to post or read posts.This winter hasn't been too bad but it is hammering our phone lines.This is a small no strike that tiny town when the lines go down they seem to be screwed up for quite awhile.Just a question about the Mars shot. Will baseball games be televised there? 37 days until pitchers and catchers report.GO GIANTS!!!
Asa, I agree with you (with the exception of the naked chicken part)it's minus 4 here already tonight.
fun girl, with all the posting about your chili the other day I had to talk my wife into fixing up a batch.

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18464: Nice to see you, auh2. Sorry about the phone line problems. Hey fun girl and homemaker, Go Colts! Are either of you Colts fans? I'm not. I just thought you'd like to hear that. I'm not really too much into football. My son is, but he is kind of a fair weather fan--jumping from team to team! We used to tease him. He's wear Chicago Bears pants with a Pittsburgh Steelers coat and a St. Louis Rams hat! (He was a little younger then.) Take care. Got a deadline Thursday and I need to get BUSY! So glad you're getting a new puppy, Asa! Ro, I'm glad you tuned into Flylady. She's good, real good.
Charlotte Tucker

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18465: That's “He'd wear”! (Good grief, I'm an editor!)

January 13, 2004 - Msg 18466: spot= be at breakfast by one am. want to get the cream of the breakfast. tee=hee. brisco darling, jr. where you been? we have been needin your help with our mayberry moon and mars colonies.auh20== on my porch there will always be a baseball game going. the first two years the cubs win and then boston followed by giants. they need a blessing. hi sterling and boo. mrs wiley sorry your feeling poorly, prayers for a speedy recovery and asa and sterlings weather for you. if you run into banjo jerry or county nurse tell them we love and miss them. i think banjo's from st augustine, fl. i was bye old jeb's pruits place in my brown truck and he is living high on the hog. he's got grade a orange peels on the slop pile.must have won the redneck retirement plan. poor feller still ain't found no wife. pleasent dreams, one and all. pipeman

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18467: Hey friends. Lost 3.5 pounds this week. Yipeeeee!
And Doc Olson has a fancy scale that measures body fat and lean body mass. She said what I lost was pure fat. No lean muscle mass lost. I reckon that's good news.

homemaker...I'll warn ya, I am a rabble rouser. Just ask that durn interloper from my last place of employment. I'd apply but I believe it would be quite a drive for me from Martinsville to where you are. I think I may just hibernate for the rest of the winter. The weather was not too bad today, but the nights sure get chilly.

Thursday is the day when I get my shot for my back. Hooray for me!

I am not a sports nut, but I do get excited when a sports team from Indiana gets into the playoffs or something. I was in college in Tennessee in 1987 when Indiana University won the NCAA playoffs. That was the year that Keith Smart made a basket at the last second and boy was I sweating. Another Hoosier friend and I wore our red and white the next day to class. We were so excited. Now days I get more excited about double coupon days at the grocery. LOL

Somebody go poke a sharp stick under possum's rock. Let her know we are missing her.
Gonna hit the ironing board.

Later friends,
fun girl

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18468: good morning porch,it's 1 am and i'm on my way to spot's for breakfast, see you all there in about an half hour. way to go fun girl- get two shots and with that ;oss girl you'll be flying to martinsvolle in no time. i'd bet you and homemaker would wake that place up.you mentioned when you were in college made me think when i was i told the professors that my dog ate my homework, they never believed me but my dog kept me in paper fire logs for six years. tee=hee. may the good lord smile on you and yours your pipeman

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18469: morning dear"s..possum where are ya [poke,poke]...slow at the old power company this morning...lets have hot dogs for lunch ,chips,pickles,and kool-aid..signed: Spot the"hotdog"of the porch

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18470: Okay fun girl - just thougth I'd give you a fair shot at the job, I mean by the time you paid for your gas to get here let alone the two hour drive (at least) each way. . .you'd almost have a life!
We ended up with that momma goat having three babies (two boys and one girl) - all are resting comfortably. Still waiting on two more to have babies - they are in the birthing ward :).
And there are a few more in the pen waiting to their turn to multiply.
I would prefer a tuna salad sandwich with chips and baked beans. NO pickles please and grape kool-aid!
Everyone have a great day!


January 14, 2004 - Msg 18471: tuna salad for HM, ya dont like pickles?..what about bologna sandwiches?..bread and butter pickles?..ya ever had dill pickle potato chips?.what cha like in yer tuna salad?..how do yo make yours?.onions?..mustard ? mayo?..signed: Spot the"question asking dog" of the mayberry porch

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18472: homemaker== how about this weekend having a cookout at your place? you know we could have barbequed goat, burgers roast and all the trimmimgs. in ok. i acquired a taste for it. forgive me if i offended you on the goats but i thought some folks don't know how good goat, goats milk, cheese is.i'm a big fan of goats. little brown truck will be a little busy getting ready for the busch truck series races, this year we'll show dale jerrett , he'll beg to drive it. pipeman

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18473: okay - I can do bologna with miracle whip on white, my tuna I like pretty basic (tuna, mayo, eggs, a hint of picle!) - bread and butter pickles are okay and I like them in my tuna salad and potato salad. I'm tooo sweet to be a dill!


January 14, 2004 - Msg 18474: miracle whip!.thats just runt mayo![sorry].cook out goat at HM!..great..get a young one ,i will bring the slaw..spot

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18475: Homemaker! Are you gonna let them talk like that about your baby goats?? I for one will not be partaking in any barbecued goat! They're too cute to eat. All you folks that live in the city are making me mighty thankful that I live out here on the prairie in God's country! I threw away my corporate job and just enjoy working from my house and in my garden. Trust me it can be done. Life's too precious to waste it doing things you hate. Hang in there, Ed Sawyer. Gotta get busy. Everybody have a Mayberry Day.
Charlotte Tucker

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18476: hey now pipeman came up with the goat bbq, I just did not want to hurt anyones feelings so i was gona eat![ha ha]...and CT i know what ya mean i have 12+ acers and a small farm and just so thankful for it..pasture and a barn..dad had 6 acers in front of me...im about 1200 feet from the main road..no noise...and if i took a notion to run out to my truck in my skivees i can..signed: Spot the"back woods" dog of the porch

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18477: Sounds like you have a real nice place there, Spot. Of course I run out to my truck in my skivies here in the city (guess that's why the neighbors call me 'eccentric'). Well, I don't actually wear men's underwear but do go out in pajamas or nightshirts sometimes when I forget to set the trash cans out on trash pick-up day.

Who is Marshall Faulk, by the way?


January 14, 2004 - Msg 18478: We don't have any goats ready to BBQ - sorry. They maybe cute but they are raised with a purpose and they are meat goats. Don't be talking bad about miracle whip (a sandwich isn't a sandwich)!
Spot - you and Asa would both be naked chickens in the freezer! Ooh - what a sight!

Did any one see the show Surreal Life on the WB - Tammy Faye Baker, Erik Estrada, Vanilla Ice, Ron Jeremy and a couple of others living all in the same house. The first episode was quite interesting - nothing like Mayberry and Andy would have been shocked and appalled!

And Boo -living in the country - I have been seen rescuing goats in my nightgown and even bottle feeding them in my nightgown (in the spring and summer that is). I guess I am a free spirit at times.


January 14, 2004 - Msg 18479: Oh, I didn't realize you actually raised your goat for meat. Oh well, then I'll try some I guess. I thought all that barbecue talk would be offending you. Boo, Marshall Faulk plays football for the St. Louis Rams. Why? Did someone mention him?
Charlotte Tucker

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18480: thanks Boo, dont get locked up for being eccentric! ha ha, and HM i"ll take 2 goats when they are ready..but miracle whip [whew] sorry and what is this naked chickens in the freezer bit?..got me puzzled..signed: Spot the"might be a naked chicken" chick-dog of the porch

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18481: fungirl- Don't ya know ironing borads is for adventure sleepin' , not for "hitting". :)
Wow, there are just WAY too many comedians on this porch! (heehee) Did a bit of my own TAGS marathon durin' my recovery, so am up for another
quote a thon. Any takers?
Andy:Hey barn
Barn: Yeah
Andy: That vein on your neck is stickin' out again.

"Well you're real funny. What ya gonna do next,
wax the steps at the old folks home."
By the way, for all of us that think like Ed sawyer, and dream of Mayberry days, I just realized watching "citizen's arrest" yesterday
that there was some "bad" times, like that episode. Barney and Goober fightin' mad, and barney throwin' himself in jail. I thought,
STOP, this aint Mayberry! Then no epilog to settle my mind back down! Whew!
Marshall Faulk I think was Al Becker's cousin. :)
Hey, how we gettin' such risque words like skivies and naked past the Mayberry censor??
(another :) )
I think I'm finally up for dinner again, but I will pass on the goat! But a grilled ham and cheese sure sounds good!
Pipeman- yeah, let's get the brown truck in a nascar race!
Ah, baseball is almost here again... I can already smell the roasted peanuts..
Mr Darlin's Cuz

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18482: Hey All,
We need to one day have a MAYBERRY PORCH LIVE REUNION. It would be nice to meet some of you good folks in person. Glad to see ya'll doing well. I just wanted to check in and say "Hey". Take care all and have a Maybery Kinda Day!

Ed Sawyer

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18483: mdc== i can see the cubbies taking the field already, play ball. hi charlotte tucker= and the people said amen. when you put off slowing down and living where you want the years fly by. then your health gets poor and you can't enjoy it or well i'll wait till next year. i really wouldn't have made the goat comment if i'd not known that homemaker sold them and products. i got acquainted in oklahoma, alabama and tenn. on the process of goat raising. i love you all to much to say something like that without knowing. hm had said earlier she hoped to get a couple sold earlier. this is not meant to upset you because i know you have a great caring and loving heart and you look after us and i'm thankfull. pipeman

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18484: nascar,nascar,nascar,,yea,,,,,spot

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18485: Hey M.D.C. I agree with that Citizens Arrest ep. I hated it when Barney gets down right mean at Andy the way he did for a spell.


January 14, 2004 - Msg 18486: Hey, spot, the jumping for nascar, dog o the porch: I take it your'e a fan too!
hey, let's plan that porch reunion at Charlotte's farmhouse, she's got a real porch and everthang!
pipeman- we can talk about the cruisin' days and the hamburger joints, we'd dance with the gals
when life was pretty innocent. Whatta ya think, Charlotte, ready for us to pull up in our
duece coupes and pompadors? I really need to slow down a bit. Do you have any horses there?

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18487: Hey to the Porch! Not much going on here, but wanted to drop in and say hey to my neighbors.

Briscoe Jr., I have a different email address, so use my old one. LOL Good to cya!


January 14, 2004 - Msg 18488: My porch is you alls' porch, MDC! Rev up your engines! Hey to De§ and pipeman! I agree with you Asa. For that reason I'm not that fond of that ep!
Charlotte Tucker

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18489: Yippie, we're heading for Charlotte's!
A real country treat. Somebody ring the triangle!
I know there must be a real mccoys fan somewhere in this bunch. "Goll durn it, little luke; give that back to hassie!"
or we could go with: "this is a story of a man named jed..." or even "sit right back and you'll hear a tale..."
hey asa and charlotte- maybe Helen wrote that episode!! (harhar)

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18490: Hey back atcha, Miss Charlotte!


January 14, 2004 - Msg 18491: Hey...the man on the TV just said that it's way yonder more cold on Mars than it is here in Chicago...I'm rethinkin this whole "Goobers Mars Fillin Station"...I want to go where it's warm!

See those KY Wildcats last night! I was crawlin all over the back of the couch...Tubby just sat there all calm and all...maybe thats why he's the coach and I'm just the #1 fan! GO BLUE!

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18492: mdc= luke to grandpa, well you've done it now grandpa. hassie's so mad she refuses to fix anything to eat or speak to us. hey spot = take my invisible red vette convertible with a white top and cruise on over to miss tuckers, if we're real good she might let us watch nascar where the little brown truck blows dale jerrets doors off- won't drive a brown truck, eh? asa= andy always said that barney was about 80 pounds of stubborn pride but a great person, but still can't sing a lick. pipeman

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18493: goober= we posted at the same time, you beat me to the draw like the cubs will do if only we had pudge. that boy can throw a ball on his knees dead center 400 yards. if it gets that cold on mars you can sell anti- freese by the truck loads. tee=hee. pipeman

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18494: That's a good point...there's good money in anti freeze! We'll see about the cubbies...now they're making some serious noise about brining Maddox back...that would be interesting...

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18495: ok to charlotte"s it is ..MDC nascaaaaaar is the greatest..got a house full of nascar stuff.[good stuff]...and you can come tonight Boo but not in yer skivies!..barn will arrest ya!..well its off to the skate park with the kids..signed: Spot the "caint skate but can ride a unicycle"[for real] dog of the porch

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18496: hello everyone , Spot and Pipeman ,glad to see you guys are nascar fans I live about 45 minutes from Charlotte N.C. and about 20 min. from Moresville N.C. which is basically the hub of nascar racing ,a very large number of the top teams on the nascar cup,busch, and truck series have the shops in this area ,and Pipeman old Dale Jarret raced many ,many races just up the road about 5 miles at the Hickory Motor Speedway when he first started racing and has his museum and office about an 1/8th of a mile from Hickory speedway cant wait till the Daytona 500 next month
mayberry deputy

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18497: Ok, change of plans, we're all headed to Mayberry deputy's place for a nascar race, then on to Charlotte's!
Goober- If you do open that Gas station on Mars, you cant go calling in false hold up reports!
pipeman- do you mean Kate aint cooking? Hassie is the kid girl. Unless your talking about the twilight zone version of the show. (heehee)
The one funny scene in the citizens Arrest ep
is when Otis shows up for his stay in jail, and,
in trying to figure out whay barney's IN jail etc, he says "I must be in the twilight zone!"
Where's Romeena these days? And Mayberry Girl?
FG- hope your throat is better.
Who's cookin' tonight? Then we gotta plan the eats for Charlottes.
Hey Briscoe, long time no see.
Mr Darlin's Cuz

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18498: pipeman,iused to live in one of those ky towns and I sure do miss it sometimes.thanks for the memory.ky girl

January 14, 2004 - Msg 18499: Good one, MDC! Maybe Helen did write that ep! You know, just the fact that the episode upset so many of us testifies to the fact that Barney and Andy were very good actors, doesn't it?

Well, the kids need my attention so I need to be on my way. Have a nice evenin' everybody!


January 15, 2004 - Msg 18500: Howdy friends...Mayberry Deputy are you gonna be in Daytona next month? If so, I'll hitch a ride with you. I am not a nascar nut, but I do love good eats and there is a restaurant that serves out of this world food. Aunt Catfish's-- have any of you ever heard of it. It is in Daytona Beach not far from the race track. Well worth the visit. Delicious sea food and sweet potatoes to die for.

Well durn, now I've gone and made myself hungry.

Later friends.
fun girl

January 15, 2004 - Msg 18501: good morning world, it's 1:30 am in the middle of the month.mdc= since the holiday's we're missing about half the porch. banjo jerry, county nurse, tom,possum,salty dog, lawerence, barney buff, hank, shoe, moutain girl to name a few. wonder if them martians got them? i was just throwin you a darn ringer to see iof you was the genuine fan. spot== whose your favorite driver? i like tony the tiger- he's g-r-e-a-t. KY GIRL= remember when everybody grew a few tobaker plants in their yards? goober= we don't need maddox we need a catcher, especially if the one we have gets hurt. what do you think about them charging the roof topper so much? just another sign that traditions are tossed out the window for money. i don't even pay floyd 15 dollars for a haircut and i don't own the barbershop.charging folks by the team to watch a ballgame from someone's private balcony, what's next, towns charging for you to set in your yard to watch fireworks or a town parade? boo= did you hear our government wants to send people to the moon and mars? seems we have competion everywhere we turn. may the good lord smile on you and yours. the pipeman