April 10, 2004 - Msg 20696: Marcia the only thing you worship is you big fat butt, you are not welcome on this board. Go on now get out before I get the broom and swat you. You are nothin but poison. Rosie

April 10, 2004 - Msg 20697: Rosie, everyone know about you. They know that you are pretty, thin and rich. This board is only for ugly, fat and poor people. Food is our life, so find another board, I'm takeing over. Marcia

April 10, 2004 - Msg 20698: In my belly, Ah likes to feel
A great big greazy po folk meal
Some tasty yeller chedder cheese
fat back stewed wit black eye peas
pickeled eggs and rabbit stew
all this food is good for you
juicy pears and yellow corn
makes you glad that you were born
Wash it down with lots of beer
makes me want to shed a tear
milkey way and snicker bars
lots and lots of olive jars
buttered bread and camel toe
God I miss my brother Joe
humer me and humer you
everything they say is true
food she fills you up inside
ate it all until I died

April 10, 2004 - Msg 20699: the above is by tim.

April 10, 2004 - Msg 20700: tim writes better poams than tom.

April 10, 2004 - Msg 20701: Tim I think your poam is stupid and you drink too much

April 10, 2004 - Msg 20702: 20697, 20698, 20699, 20700, and 20701 were all posted by the same person. Mary/Marcia/Tim/unsigned even signed one post (#20607) as 'Hazel'. I guess some folks just ain't got nothing better to do. In the old days, this would have called for THE BIG FREEZE!

April 10, 2004 - Msg 20703: Hi all im Howie from Indiana and a bigtime andy griffth fan heck i watching it right now its about Aunt bee getting a car.I wouls like to join the chat room but im having soom trouble gettin log in.Any help would be great thanks and God Bless you all ..

April 10, 2004 - Msg 20704: BIG FREEZE! Hey to pipeman, Tom in West Virginia, Asa, Mrs. Wiley, Mary Wiggins, Hazel, Floyd, Spot, Sterling Holobyte, Boo, Romeena, (Where are you two?), homemaker, Fun Girl, Frankie Flint, jennieboone, Dež, Ellen Brown, bulbsnatcher, Miss Ellie, Possum under a Rock, AFD, Mr. Darlin's Cuz, Goober, Ed Sawyer, Will Stockdale, Briscoe, auh2O, Salty Dog, mavis, Milton P. Oliver, Emmett & Martha, and angefan. Hope I didn't forget anyone. Happy Easter to you all! There are some folks from the past I wonder what happened to like Happy, The Rock, and that Dixie chick, Dixiebelle. Welcome to Steve. Wasn't sure if he's from Connecticut or he's using my initials!
Charlotte Tucker

April 10, 2004 - Msg 20705: Oh sorry, Welcome Howie!

April 10, 2004 - Msg 20706: Am I on the right porch?? Don't look like my porch I been used to sittin on.

April 10, 2004 - Msg 20707: Yes, Mavis, you're on the right porch. But we've had some people on lately that are intent on stirring up trouble. One of them even posts under my name sometimes. I think they've got a compelsion of some sort. We've got a real situation here! In Mayberry! How have you been Mavis? We've missed you! How's the puppy bidness?
- Hazel

April 10, 2004 - Msg 20708: Puppy bidness is busy, busy, busy~lots of dirty puppies out there ya know. On a sadder note, my uncle passed away on Tues. & the family is just a mess. My mother, uncle and aunt that live here flew out tues to try to see him & he passed away while they were on the plane. Needless to say it has been a really hard week on everyone. My sister and I are running both businesses until she gets back & it is wearing us out, but being with her siblings is more important so we told her to stay as long as she needed to stay. Please keep my family in your prayers, everyone is having a really hard time dealing with his death, we knew it was coming, just thought we had more time, Dr. gave him 3-6 months just a week ago.
I'm off to the ironing board, my tired body is yelling for some sleep. If anyone emails me or asks about me, please don't get upset or worried, it's not that I don't want to answer, just trying to find more time in the day is my problem. Glad to know I'm still in Mayberry though, must be the fallout, it's affecting the milk you know.

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20709: Hi All. Will it look like thing are not to happy here. will it time to stop all this fight here or andy will take you all to jale for the holiday and you will not be home what you all family.
tim stop drinking the firewatersee no one like the poem from you.
all the one that i post come the heart.


April 11, 2004 - Msg 20710: Happy Holiday to you too Tom WV I LOVE your poems, & could you please keep my family in your prayers. Thanks a bushel.

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20711: Happy Easter Porch!

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20712: Good evening, folks! Wow! I leave for a week or so and all these interlopers come in. Or perhaps it's just one interloper. Near as I can tell, most of these posts are by the same person, using at least two computers. Can't help but feel sorry for someone who has to entertain themselves like that. Surely there would be something better they could do with their time. Mary/Marcia/Rosie/Tim/Whoever, this porch is open to anyone who can behave themselves and be open about themselves. This is our own little Mayberry, and if you can act like somebody and show that you have a little smart, you're welcome here. Otherwise, just move on down the road, because we have no use for you. I suspect that you're probably a teenager, maybe two teenagers, and when you're not bugging us, you're probably calling the zoo and asking to speak to Mr. Fox. Yes, I did that when I was thirteen. Grow up. As for your criticism of our own dear Tom, you pick on that young man and you're walking on our fightin' side. We love him here, and appreciate his poetry, and it's mean-spirited and tacky of you to say what you said. All things considered, it appears that it would be better if you just take your visits to a teenage chatroom and join the "fun" there.

I'm back from my week in Michigan with my husband's family, and I had a lovely time. They're good people, and made me feel so welcome. I haven't read all the archives yet, but am working on it. Just glad to be home, sure did miss everyone, and especially my little Plum. She was very glad to see me, and of course, I was delighted to see her. More later. Sugarplum says hey! --Romeena

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20713: Well said, Romeena, and glad you are back! Yeah, these interlopers are something else aren't they?(something else that I'm too much of a gentleman to mention)
"He's a pestilence and a pestilence will find you"...-Dud
Well, I'd better go. Happy Easter everyone!
-Sterling Holobyte

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20714: Hellow! Porch! saw,ang,dancing,tonight on a color,EP , man! prurty, sloppy, but opie, seemed, To get the the light.Just thought I say hey, To you fine folk's on the porch. Good easter ta'all, and the LORD. I came home late tonight, but when't to church yesterday. "Eventhought exousted. Not to be sure, but ,it seem's no-one want's to talk at me? Have I offended ya'all In some way .. Your parriniod. Friend ~~SRM~~

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20715: welcome Howie!..do i see some anger on the porch at the top of the page?...sure hope things calm down..Happy Easter to all...Hey Frankie!Ro,pipiman,SRM,mavis,CT,Tom,sterling,..today is a great day,raining here,stoped by services on the way to work..gona be quick breakfast this morning , everybody busy,,ham and bisquits with mustard,bottled water..signed:SPOT the"saying God bless to all today" dog of your wet porch in GA...

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20716: Exactillioso, Romeena. You summed the situation up exactly. I'm so glad you're back. Everything's OK in Mayberry today! No, SRM, you haven't offended us. Sorry you felt left out. I think everyone has been busy lately, and also since we've had some interlopers on the porch, attendance here has been WAY down. I saw that color ep last night too. Funny, I used to not like that one, but laughed out loud watching it last night. Those kids dancing, doing the "frog" or the "swim", or whatever it was. Then Andy trying it. Those color eps are beginnig to get to me. It used to be that there was only a couple I liked; and now there's only a couple I don't like! Happy Easter to all!
- Hazel

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20717: Happy Easter porchpals!! HE IS RISEN!!!

Ro, welcome home, we surely missed you. I'll bet Plum was beside herself when you got home. Who watches her for you? You and Sterling hit the nail right on the head. BIG FREEZE. Good news for us all...TVLand starts running the b/w eps on April 14th I believe. Sorry to be so short (haha... when you're 5foot 1 that's always a hoot to say), but I have to go get gussied up for Preachin. Today's the highest Holy day of the year! TOM-WV, do you have something purty written for Easter?

~ Mrs. Wiley
Christ the Lord is risen today...Ah-ah-a-a-a-Le-luiah!
Fear and death are gone away...Ah-ah-a-a-a-Le-luiah!

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20718: Mornin' Y'all and a Blessed Easter to everyone! Glad you're back on the porch Ro and AMEN to what you said up there! Thanks! Hey to Tom and all the regulars.Have a great day!
possum under a rock

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20719: Oh my, it is so nice to see some folks back that we ain't seen in a while, Tom, Mavis, Romeena, Hazel, Charlotte, possum. I thought you had all changed the meeting place on me. Very well said Romeena. I do hope whoever will listen and respect.
Hey SRM, don't want you feeling like that. Your always welcome here. Sorry if you felt we had froze ya.
Mrs Wiley, the 14? Thats wonderful news. Cause unlike Hazel I find myself turning off the color eps. I used to like them some till TV Land started making them to regular like. I cannot wait for the DVD'S to come out. That will be great.
I hope and pray you all have a wonderful Easter day and have time to reflect on Who made everything possible. I sat on my porch this morning and watched the sun come up over the Wasatch mountains to my east and pondered it all for a while. Hard to imagine that kind of love.
Anyway, don't mean to offend anyone who are not believers. It's just a special day for those that do.
God bless you all porch pals.


April 11, 2004 - Msg 20720: It sure is a special day Asa.........it sure is..............SPOT

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20721: a glorious morning to one and all. easter bonnets on, easter egg eating all day. as you know i've been busy with doctors and neighbors kin so i haven't read archieves yet. only comment is it takes a coward to express their views and sign others name. fortunately we know each other well enough that when something is way out of character for the person we figure it's not from them. SRM and other new porchsters may i encourage you not to take it personal if you think we're ignoring you for we're not. when you have so many people and a busy time of year as charlotte tuker's post points out, there is probably 50 more that could be listed. when you read a post please try and remember the person posting is for each person and it's easy to forget an acknowledgement,we love both new and old alike. howie= welcome we have a great folks from the porch who are from indiana, now we have one more. welcome steve, i've been out awhile so i'm not caught up or in the big groove yet. mavis= you and yours are in my prayers.your on the right porch sometimes someone has to show out. hazel= as i said earlier i've not read the archives but when someone posts their opinion and don't sign a name or they sign someone else they're cowards. fortunatyely we know each other to know when something is out of character for our regulars.ro- sugarplum= welcome home we missed you. asa, sterling, mdc, goober, spot, spot, fun girl, emma, homemaker, elen brown, frankie flyn, mary wiggins, mrs wiley, auh20 and everyone have a great easter- spot please don't let anyone cook that easter bunny. ha. briscoe, ky moonshiner,boo. see what i mean how easy it is to forget to mention someone? got to light the old briar. pipeman

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20722: Hi Mavis. yes I will keep you and family in me prayre. just like you all did for my . tom wv

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20723: PIPEMAN wish i could cut and paste all the porchsters you just named but "Dito" for me saying hey to all...!!prayers to ya Mavis..well I think when I get off work [hate to have to work on this day but somebody has to keep the stoves on to cook all that fine food],my 13 yr old are gona fire up the 4-wheelers and hit the power lines and ride and enjoy this great day in the south!..signed: SPOT the"gona ride 4-wheelers and look at what all he made for me" talking dog of the porch!..lights are ON !

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20724: Hello and happy Easter to everyone ,good to see so many regulars are back ,also good to see most of the new comers as well .Romenna your post 20712 was right on and Tom does write some good poetry .
Mayberry Deputy

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20725: Yep, Charlotte, I'm from Connecticut.......and Marvis, Sorry to hear about your Uncle........"He is Risen!" (Barney, please don't sing!!)
-Steve (CT)

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20726: I DO believe my stomache is so full from all the eats today.........never MIND the "chocolate!"
I figure if I rock too much I may not be able to keep it all down, so I think I'll just sit here til Otis goes stumbling by, and help him home.
-Steve (CT)

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20727: Have a Blessed Easter everyone.


April 11, 2004 - Msg 20728: Romeema, thats the Easter sprit. never meant to upset any of you. I guess we did get carried away. It isnt nice to make fun of your board. In truth if you want to talk about people with nothing better to do,Sorry i am sure this is your big thing in life. Go back to your sitting and eating and what ever you do to fill your day. Rosie

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20729: FLOYD! PLEASE Help us with these interlopers.
Please remove 20697 and 20697!
Don't need that on this here porch,
A Blessed Easter to one and ALL!
Mr Darlin's Cuz (more later)

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20730: 20702, we have alot to do, but we can see that by devoting our time to you is as gracious as it can get. tim

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20731: 20704 You left out Mary, Marcia, Rosie and Tim. WWJD? He never left anyone out. Rosie

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20732: Romeena, Romeena, Romeena You claim that anyone with a little smart is welcome on this board. Yes that's it, A LITTLE SMART.Where do you people come from. All you do is talk about food and say lines from the Andy Griffith Show. Don't you have lives. How old are you people. What a bunch of dull sad sacks.

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20733: Oh and one more thing, When given the big freeze, make ice cream. lolololololol


April 11, 2004 - Msg 20735: Hmmm, seems like we struck a nerve. They just don't get it, do they, folks? Do some of you oldtimers remember when "Tic" and "Yahoo" used to pay us their unwelcome visits and trash up the place? Ignoring them seemed to make more difference than anything else, and they finally went away. These folks will do the same thing. I feel more pity for them than anything else, because they truly just don't get it. Oh, my, if they only knew! They could be so welcome if they'd quit being spiteful and just be nice, and if they'd be quiet long enough to learn what this porch is all about. You'd think they'd know that when you enter a site through "Mayberry.com" that it just might be mostly about the Andy Griffith Show. Big surprise!

Our pastor's sermon this morning was on proving or disproving the resurrection story, and I've never heard the subject dealt with more intelligently or more clearly. It was inspiring, convincing, and convicting, and I'm grateful that I had the opportunity to hear it.

From there I went to my comadre's house (comadre - the mother of my son's wife, and my dear good friend) for dinner and spent the afternoon playing with my two delightful little grandsons. Now I'm going to kick back and cuddle with the Plum, and have a peaceful Sabbath evening. Life is sweet, and God is good. Sugarplum says hey! --Romeena

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20736: Thanks for the prayers folks, they are truely appreciated. Tom you said a mouthful of truth in that post, this porch is exactly that & we do care for each other, that is what makes it so special. Funny how we can grow so attatched to one another through these little machines huh? Blessed Easter to each & every one.

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20737: test

April 11, 2004 - Msg 20738: Romeena, yep, I remember them... I think every board on the net has one or two people that show up and just creates a big moulage out of everything. Like Barney said, there's only one thing to do when interlopers show up... "me and you, the big freeze."

-- Will Stockdale, P.L.O.

April 12, 2004 - Msg 20739: Hello Friends,

I've performed a "Big Freeze" on Rosie, Marcia, Mary, and Tim who are all the same person so hopefully it will slow down his/her ability to post messages like he/she has been posting.

Again folks....ignoring them is by far the best way to get them to leave us alone. They come here just to cause trouble and if they can't...they won't have fun and they'll likely get tired of it and leave.

Just don't let him/her take away your fun and enjoyment of Mayberry.

God Bless,

April 12, 2004 - Msg 20740: No. God Bless YOU, Floyd! ~ Mrs. Wiley

April 12, 2004 - Msg 20741: Thank you so much, Floyd!
- Hazel

April 12, 2004 - Msg 20742: Floyd - your education was worth every penny!


April 12, 2004 - Msg 20743: Ya would think with all his smarts he could get my sideburns even though.
Thanks Floyd.:)


April 12, 2004 - Msg 20744: Hey Everyone - Old friends and new friends. Hope you all had a nice Resurrection Day/Easter. I had my family down and got to see my month-old nephew for the first time.

Thanks Floyd - I 'preciate ya!

Prayers for you and your family, Mavis. Sorry to hear of your loss.

LOL to you and yours, AFD!

April 12, 2004 - Msg 20745: Forgot to put this in my post above -- Don't forget Andy Griffith on the Biography channel tomorrow, for those of you who have it...

*Don Knotts, Ron Howard and more friends profile actor Andy Griffith.

Tue Apr 13 09:00P BIO- Biography Channel
Wed Apr 14 01:00A BIO- Biography Channel*

Oh, yeah - I also wanted to say *woohoo* - for my man, Phil Mickelson, who won his first major (The Masters, no less) yesterday. Way to go, Phil!


April 12, 2004 - Msg 20746: Asa, he cuts your sideburns even, it's just one of your ears are lower! Thanks Floyd!

My sympathies to you Mavis. Prayers for you and your entire family.

--Wil Stockdale, P.L.O.

April 12, 2004 - Msg 20747: Hey to the PORCH , been a bit since I've had some time to sit. Things not going so well with my dad, we had to make a quick trip to Ohio on Friday.

Hope everyone had a GREAT Easter day...it's amazing to know how great a love HE gave for us. Unworhty as we are, He paid a debt he didn't owe...and now we owe a debt we could never repay.

Good to see everyone on here...SPOT...got to have some gravy and buscits over the weekend...thought of you. Pipe...cubbies open at home today...they better wear the parkas. It's cold here in chicago...

Ya'll be good...


April 12, 2004 - Msg 20748: i agree floyd by igtnoring unfavorable comments they woill reform and enjoy or choose some other site more in there comfort zone. goober= cubbies should wait till friday when it's near 70. you know same as fishing when you get older you only play when it's comfortable. ha. mary, county nurse, marcia, rosie, tom, tim, srm, and anyone who feels left out please believe me your not. as our porch has flourished wonderfully it would mean a sweep after each posts by name and msg. i don't get mentioned by name but i know i'm in everyone's thoughts and prayers and that's enough for me. if anyone can come upwith a better way to post please share it with us. solutions are better than what's wrong. there i said it and i ain't taking it back. what can the brown truck do for you? sending my love and prayers to each one. pipeman

April 12, 2004 - Msg 20749: I agree with you pipeman. All posters are welcome, but mean-spirited posts are NOT welcome!
I think that pretty much sum things up.
Also, I loved Romeena's post about if you come to a TAGS website, the dominate coversation will most likely be T A G S!!! :)
Glad all had a great Easter! Prayers for Goober's dad. Please keep my mother in your prayers. She is 85 and starting to fail a bit.
It's a tough time for us posters who had parents of WWII age, as they are going quickly.
AFD- I agree, way to go Phil M my ASU buddy!
OK Spot, how bout some fried chicken, johnny cake, possum pie, iced tea, mixed veges and the smoothest mashed potatoes to ever twang yer buds!
Ed Sawyer, are you still ringin' Luci matthew's doorbell? You're the limit!
"I saw Gabby Hayes just before I left Hollywood, and he said, 'how's the picture business?'"
Maybe I'll be a brine tester at a pickle factory!
OK, yes I DID put in a tags video yesterday!
THANK YOU porchsters for you prayers, your company and your love!

April 12, 2004 - Msg 20750: Hey Porch!
I am back from my little trip up north in Michigan! (By the way, Romeena, you mean to say you were in Michigan and didn't look me up!? Just kidding, I am sure it was great to see your family!)

We had a wonderful Easter up at my friends. We were able to see a dear friend preach, and we had tons of great food and great fellowship. (I bet it is exactly what all us porchsters would do if we all got together!) My daughter told me it was a quiet Easter for her though, and that made me feel bad again! I did tell her she was welcome to go with us, so I am not TOTALLY a bad mother!

Tom, loved your poem up there!

Oh, and pipeman, pipeman,pipeman, I just wanted to say your name for a few times so I could confirm your theory that you are in our thoughts! ;)

Have a great Mayberry Day all,
Mary Wiggins

April 12, 2004 - Msg 20751: Hey Porch!
I am back from my little trip up north in Michigan! (By the way, Romeena, you mean to say you were in Michigan and didn't look me up!? Just kidding, I am sure it was great to see your family!)

We had a wonderful Easter up at my friends. We were able to see a dear friend preach, and we had tons of great food and great fellowship. (I bet it is exactly what all us porchsters would do if we all got together!) My daughter told me it was a quiet Easter for her though, and that made me feel bad again! I did tell her she was welcome to go with us, so I am not TOTALLY a bad mother!

Tom, loved your poem up there!

Oh, and pipeman, pipeman,pipeman, I just wanted to say your name for a few times so I could confirm your theory that you are in our thoughts! ;)

Have a great Mayberry Day all,
Mary Wiggins

April 12, 2004 - Msg 20752: Hiccup, oops, sorry I didn't mean to do that!

April 12, 2004 - Msg 20753: Mary W, you been reachin' down under Otis's kitchen planter again? There's a pretty big bottle down there ya know!
Good to have so many of you back! It was quite a week with all the interlopers!
I forgot to mention in my earlier post today of our Easter surprize of one of my 3 rels being back!
He said he's willing to go back anytime to keep OUR country free of such things! He's a brave
26 year marine! I thank the good Lord for him.
Keep up the prayers for all over there.
I think of the OT battle when Aaron held up the arms of Moses, and they continued to have victory!
Have a good day!
Mr Darlin's Cuz

April 12, 2004 - Msg 20754: Tomorrow on TVLand: Episode 089 - Andy's English Valet

This alert brought to you by your own...
~ Mrs. Wiley

April 12, 2004 - Msg 20755: Mrs Wiley ,thanks for the alert on episode 089 It is one of my favorites ,of course I have many favorites . Hope everyone on the porch has a great evening
Mayberry Deputy

April 12, 2004 - Msg 20756: Howdy, all! This is sorrowful Romeena - this morning I checked at work and it looked like I had an excellent chance of getting cancelled and being able to stay home tonight, and at 5:20 I found out that I have to go in after all. We'll be overstaffed, but one of us is a new hire and she keeps insisting she needs more orientation, so they dou't count her in the total staff. She's not a new nurse, just new to this hospital. Humph! I'd be ashamed to say I needed more orientation after nearly three months. What on earth does she think she still has to learn? (Grumble, grumble.)

Pipeman, I hope you'll always know that you're one of my favorite people, and I look forward to seeing you and the brown truck. I try to avoid listing names, because I know with my memory I'm bound to leave someone out, and I don't want to risk hurting anyone's feelings. So I just say "howdy" to everyone, prayers for all who need 'em, and I ask for a blessing for every member of this porch. You're the finest bunch of folks anywhere, and I'm proud to call you my friends.

Mary Wiggins, I was in Bangor, Michigan, and one day we took a little trip down to Shipshewana in Indiana, but the flea market there hadn't opened yet. No problem, we found lots of fun little shops, and of course that wonderful restaurant there. The name escapes me, but anyone in town can direct you - just ask for the best place to eat, with the wonderful bakery. They serve a raspberry cream pie that is just down on its knees being good, and I just took some extra insulin and ate a piece of it! Wow!

Well, off to work I go. Oh, well, my paycheck will look better. Sugarplum says hey! --Romeena
P.S. Thanks, Floyd.

April 12, 2004 - Msg 20757: Mary Wiggins, Bangor is about ten miles east of South Haven, on the way to Kalamazoo. It's tiny, so I figured you might not know where it was. --Romeena

April 12, 2004 - Msg 20758: Night porch! Thanks Floyd for calling in the porch police, yer a treashuh! I'm off to the ironing board, been a long day of taking care of critters & I'm tired. See you fine folks tomorrow. Oh & thanks for the prayers, the family out west seems to be doing pretty good considering.

April 12, 2004 - Msg 20759: Wow, MDC, your relative is very brave. That is so cool that he came back,
and is willing to go back again. I thank God for people like him.
- Hazel

Barn: "I did my part to defeat the dreaded Hun. this corporal and me was responsible for over 3,000 books in the PX Library on Staten Island. But I'd rather not talk about it."

April 12, 2004 - Msg 20760: Hey Folks, I am glad to help anytime. Sorry I didn't catch it sooner.

Just as a note...I'm gonna be moving the TAGSRWC.com site soon so there might be a short "down time" to the porch before the end of this month.


April 12, 2004 - Msg 20761:
Hey Folks,

We have one messed up computer here at the ranch. I hope this posts all right. I don't dare hit the archives I know it will freeze up.

Well, I make this short and see if it shows up or disappears into the great unknown that is cyber space.

Something's never change we have gotten about 3 inches of snow tonight. I thought spring had sprung.

Pipeman, just a quick note to ya, when I think of this site and all the good folks here that vent and share kind words with each other, it's your name that that comes to mind first. Does Mark Prior's injury have you worried a bit about your Cubbies?


April 12, 2004 - Msg 20762: Evening porch.
That's too bad about more snow auh2o. Dang!
Mavis, it is so good to see you back with us dear and here's more prayers coming your way for your family.
Sorry you have to work tonight Ro. Very tough when you thought you had it off.
A.F.D. I agree completely about the Lefty winning the green jacket. I am so happy for him.
Now guess what? I have an uncle who lives in Ventura California and he has two extra tickets for the big NASCAR race at Fontana speedway on May 2nd. And guess who he has invited to go? Yep, all I gotta do is find some cheap airfare to Ontario and we will be there, live and in person. I ain't ever been to any NASCAR events before. Lots of drag racing though. I bet it'll be fun.
Anyhow. I know there are some NASCAR fans here so I thought I would holler and tell ya about it.
Off to bed for me cause I is old and weary.


April 12, 2004 - Msg 20763:
Wow, it worked.

MDC, I want to echo Hazel's sentiments. Your relative is an inspiration. God bless him and all the troops, as well as, our President. I'm sure I'm not alone when I say they are never far from my thoughts and prays. Sometimes it's really had to believe what a great country we live.

I was at my daughters school play the other day and a little boy, a second grader, sung GOD BLESS AMERICA. Here was this little fella, he probably weighted 45 pounds soaking wet, singing this fantastic song, no music just him on stage in front of old glory. Well, needless to say with all that is going on in the world today the song really made the old eyes get a little moist.


April 12, 2004 - Msg 20764: weighted ??? weighed is the word I was looking for.

Asa, that sounds like a grand old time.


April 13, 2004 - Msg 20765: auh2o, glad your computer worked enough so you could post, and I hope you get things cleared up so you don't have to worry about it!

Asa, have fun at the NASCAR race! I'm not much of a race car fan myself. I've heard that some people just go to watch the car crashes... and that's just in the parking lot of the speedway! Ba-dum-bum! ;) Just kidding. Hope you have a nice time Asa!
-Sterling Holobyte

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20766: Hello Porch! You all have a Mayberry Day.

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20767: Morning, porch. Love that drum roll, Sterling!
- Hazel

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20768: Morning Porch! Mavis, prayers for your family and for the whole Porch. By the way Possum, how is little Laci doing? Asa, you're going to have a large time at NASCAR. Take some earplugs and don't get stuck in the middle of the track ring before racetime. (there aren't any restrooms there) Stay away from the fence and WATCH FOR WRECKAGE! Be ready to RUN!! Oh, and keep those wandering eyes to yourself. Yep, you'll be havin' a very large time.

~ Mrs. Wiley
Floyd: "Well, I'll tell ya Andy... I was sort of thinking of buying this car."

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20769: Just wanted all my porch friends to know how much I love you all! Been reading the posts and noting how we all stick together and stick up for what is good. You're the best! SRM, I am sorry if you thought we were giving you the Big Freeze. We weren't. I didn't see your name or I would have included you in my list on Msg 20704. Does the SRM stand for something or have you already explained that and I missed it? So good to see everyone! Loved your poem as always Tom! I'd start to name names but I know I'd leave someone out. Hope ya'll had a Happy Easter! Thanks AFD for the heads up on Biography Channel shows tonight!
Charlotte Tucker

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20770: "HEY GANG"...lunch is Chicken-a-la-king...over toast,slaw,hot peppers,sweet tea,bottled water...hey asa,ct,mdc.mary,auh2o,md,floyd,afd,rosie,hazel,mrs wiley,possum[where u been?]..signed: SPOT the"got to go mow grass" dog of this here porch...ruff..ruff..hisssss..[o-know a cat]

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20771: Asa congrats on scoring the race tickets ,hope you enjoy the race .Raining here for theast 2 days ,but cant complain its been might dry this spring .Everyone have a great day
Mayberry Deputy

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20772: Hi MDC here using up space to get those 2 mean posts at the top of the porch swept to the archives! lol
GOOOOOO Nascar! Cool tickets. I agree mrs Wiley, some of those nascar followers are pert' good lookin' to the eyes!
CHARLOTTE- Dumb ole me FINALLY figured out your handle! In watching a tape of Man in a Hurry, I noticed this time that Malcom Tucker, tells the Mendlebright sisters on the phone that he's FROM Charlotte, and one of the sisters says "Oh Charlotte Tucker." Is that it?

One for pipeman:
Barney: "Tell the gavamer to put that in his sipe and poke it!" Teehee

Thanks for the nice sentiments! That relative is my BROTHER. It's nice to have him back. The other two are nephews. Amen Auh20, God Bless America! Have a good day.

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20773: afternoon porchsters== thanks for the kind words, i was using me as an example of how i know all posts include everyone even if not by name. mavis= hope things will return to normal for you, your in my prayersd. auh20= cubbies are starting off slow but prior and the cubs will pick up steam or there's always next year. ha. mdc= loved barney one, thanks. sterling is spring here yet? mary wiggins= you sure say my name so purty. asa= is barney ready to be the blood pup in manhunts yet? thanks for the kind words romenna, the plum is like me watch everything to see what's tried and works before wasting energy. ha. supper tonight, hot dogs, baby back ribs,steak, cabbage, potato salad, homemade biscuts,real baked beans, salads and strawberry shortcake, with whipped cream, ice cream peach. usual drinks, maybe a song and dance also, spring is a wild time. porchsters spring break. pipeman

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20774: One for my brother:
Well Gomer, whenever I see a man settin' by himself in a quonset hut with a bucket on his head, I have just got to ask, "what's wrong!"
Floyd, I like the new layout! way cool!
pipeman, looks like you got some mighty good eats!
will be by later.(BTW, message for ya on the rifleman site)
Mary W.--I see that the Tigers ARE starting out pretty darn good!
Romeena- sure wish the hospitals here were OVERstaffed! Such a shortage, it aint even funny!
Well, just think of all the extraspecial care you get to give.
Ya'all have a good day!
Mr Darlin's Cuz

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20775: Pipeman , supper sure does sound good ,gained a few pounds just reading the menu
mayberry deputy

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20776: i am the flag...
I am the flag of the united states of america.
my name is old glory.
i fly atop the world"s tallest buildings.
i stand watch in america"s halls of justice.
i fly majestically over insti of learning.
i stand guard with power in the world.
look up and see me.
i stand for peace, horo, truth and justice.
i stand for freedom.
i am confident.
i am arrogant.
i am proud.
when i am flown with my fellow banners.
my head is a little higher, my colors a little truer.
i bow to no one!
i am recoginized all over the world.
i am worshipped i am saluted.
i am respected and i am feared.
i have fought in every battle of every war
for more than 200 years.
i was flown at valley forge, gettysburg,
shiloh and appomattox.
i was there at san juan hill,
the trenches of france,
in the argonne forest, anzio, rome
and the beaches of normandy, guam.
okinawa, korea and khesan, saigon, vietnam know me,
i was there.
i led my troops,
i was dirty, batt-tested and tired,
but my soldiers cheered me
and i was proud.
america has been attacked by cowardly fanatics
and many lives have been lost
but those who would destroy me cannot win
for i am the symbol of freedom,
of one nation
under god
with liberty and justice for all.
i have been burned ton and trampled
on the streets of countries i have helped set free.
it does not hurt, for i am invincible.
i have been soiled upon, burned, torn
and trampled on the streets of my country,
and when it"s by those whom i"ve served in battle it hurts.
but i shall overcome for i am strog.
i have slipped the bonds of earth

and stood watch over the uncharted frontiers of space
from my vantage point on the moon.
i have borne silent witnss
to all of america"s finest hours.
but my finest hours are yet to come.
when i am torn into stips and used as bandages
for my wounded comrades on the battlefield,
when i am flown at half mast to honor my soldier,
or when i lie in the trembling arms
of a grieving parent
at the grave of their fallen son or daughter,
i am proud.

tom wv

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20777: Pipeman, I don't know if spring is here yet. The weather keeps flip-flopping. There are alot of confused robins around here.:) BTW, that is a nice thought you posted about the posts including everyone.
Those hot dogs sound good, and that is what I am having tonight. On the grill with some corn on the cob. Unfortunately I can't eat that second one, so that is just for the wife and kid.
-Sterling Holobyte

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20778: Tom,
There are tears in my eyes,
a glow in my heart,
and a tug at my soul.
I feel good again!
Thank you,

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20779: That was a great and inspiring poem, Tom!
And on a side note thanks for making it a long one. We are that much closer to giving those mean posts at the top the sweep, as MDC said!:)
-Sterling Holobyte

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20780: "Hey" ya'll...........nice to be back ere with ya......I gotta make a road trip for my business tomorrow, so I'd sure'nuff appreciate your prayers for "journey Mercies" if ya think of it!!
The wife made the Pork Chop sandwhichs for me from Snappy Lunch...........mmmmmm mmmmmm they sure was good!!!
Watch out tonight, I hear Ernest "T" is hidin out and lookin to throw more stones......
-Stevie (CT)

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20781: Travelin' mercies on ya Stevie - come back soon! ~ Mrs. Wiley

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20782:
Hey Folks,

Well, the snow has turned to rain and as Ann Coulter said, "The rain in Spain falls mainly on the lame." Sorry about getting all political but that cracked me up when I read it.
Finally had a chance to read the archives sorry I missed the Big Freeze on the interlopers. His/her's posts reminded me of the old adage, it is far better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than it is to open it and remove all doubt.


April 13, 2004 - Msg 20783: Good afternoon, folks! Tom, thank you. That poem was perfectly lovely, and called up so many emotions, it's hard to express them all. I won't try, but will follow just one thread. Let it be said that I'm so proud and grateful to be an American. For most of us, it was our birth that made us Americans, and we had no control over that, but it is the conscious efforts of our young men and women that allow us to continue in that status.
It's pretty remarkable, when you stop to realize that our military is strictly all volunteer. We have had no draft for many years, and no one is forced to participate in the military against their will. Our troops are where they are because at some point they made a conscious decision to join the military, presumably knowing full well what it could mean. There are even some who didn't join until there was a challenge to be met. MDC, I know you're proud of your family members, and you should be. I have a nephew who rejoined the military last year, leaving a very lucrative job, and is now in the Middle East somewhere. He said he "knew he was needed." This kind of zeal and conviction is hard to defeat.

That's why this is going to be a difficult war for us to win, because we are facing an enemy who thinks he is on a mission for his god. Whether we want to admit it or not, this is a kind of religious war we are in. We are fighting an enemy whose goal is to destroy those who do not believe as they do, and who believe they will be rewarded by their god for doing so. We, on the other hand, serve a God who would have us offer Him to them in love, and make willing disciples. He would have us fight to liberate those who are being persecuted and mistreated and murdered by the servants of that other "god", and in so doing, we ensure that the poison of that religious system does not eventually envelop us as well.

Well, that's the way I see it. I'm proud of those who serve, and grateful to them, and will forever support them.

Sugarplum (who is also proud to be an American) says hey! --Romeena

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20784: You said a mouthful Romeena! and Tom that was wonderful what you posted up there. Asa WAY TO GO! Yer gonna love it, but watch out, you'll get hooked! Never in all my borned days did I think I would enjoy another sport besides football, but NASCAR has really gotten to me. Course I have to admit, I still choose the Redskins' game over NASCAR when they start running together, good thing there's 2 tv's in my house! pipeman where'd you learn to cook? Makes my mouth water just reading all that good stuff! Thank you to everybody for all the prayers, they are much appreciated! Now I leave here for a bit with just one question...Where were all you that want to sweep the porch when I was needing my house cleaned?? LOL Really tho, maybe we won't have to look at that much longer. Sweep Sweep Sweep.

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20785: Oh, almost forgot, we had 60 & 70 degree weather about 4 days ago, had rain & hail storms for the last day & a half & now, my weatherbug is telling me it's supposed to snow tonight & we're supposed to get up to 2 inches!! Now you tell me when am I gonna get to plant my nine o'clock seeds??
everybody talks about the weather, but nobody does anything about it! (and one of my favorite quotes)~~92!

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20786: Dadburn it!! Somebody took the bristles out of my broom, I'm trying to sweep I really am!

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20787: A peppermint candy with a pink center, for whoever sweeps the porch! (That was what Gomer was trying to win from Pearson's Sweet Shop)
- Hazel

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20788: Hazel I don't even like peppermint candy, but I'm still trying to sweep. We could do like Barney when he was fishing~~Come sweep come, come sweep come LOL

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20789: Think we could try to rub Opie's head or maybe a buckeye in our shoe??

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20790: Barn: Something's goin' on, I can just smell it!
Gomer: Oh, that's just the wind blowin' from the diner. They've got corn beef and cabbage on Tuesdays.
- Hazel

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20791: Mavis, that might work!
- Hazel

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20792: Yeah, but it might not.

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20793: Yeah, but it just might.

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20794: I got an idea~how about we come up with some of our favorite quotes & sweep right on into the archives with quotes~Here's just one of my many favorites~
Gomer~If I was a spider, that's where I'd go. and of course~
Barney~Gomer, get down there with those spiders and start workin!!

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20795: Hey Mavis, how about this one?
Who are you? What's your name?
Puddintame! Ask me again I'll tell you the same.


April 13, 2004 - Msg 20796: Barney: "Just me and the wind and the wheel."

~ Mrs. Wiley
sweep, sweep, sweep?

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20797: Gomer: "look...spider bite."

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20798: Malcolm: "I'm very sorry, really I am. I can't think what came over me.
I behaved like a proper Charlie."
- Hazel

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20799: Maybe this one will work:
Andy: "And you and me and Gomer and Laura Lee Hobbs will be there to meet it."

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20800: It was the very witching time of night that Icabod, heavy hearted and crestfallen, pursued his travel homeward, along the sides of the lofty hills which rise above Tarytown and which he had traversed so cheerily in the afternoon.
Did that do it?
- Hazel

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20801: "Just for that, no more Mr. Nice Guy!"
- Hazel

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20802: "Next time I go on a tiger hunt, I'm taking' along my tweezers." --Romeena

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20803: "Not that I think you would be foolish enough to try anaything here at the rock. Ya gotta get up pretty early in the morning... Doc? Tiny? Guys?"
- Hazel, still sweeping

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20804: "Boy, giraffes are selfish!" --Romeena

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20805: Let's call Malcolm! Maybe he'd sweep the porch, and I'll bet if he did, it would be a regular bobby-dazzler! --Romeena

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20806: Andy: "Soliloquy. That's where you look away off and kinda talk to yourself. They used to do that a whole lot back then. You do it today and somebody'll take you away."
- Hazel

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20807: Good idea, Ro. Maybe he'd whip us a snack! I'm clemmed from all that sweeping!
- Hazel

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20808: Well, I learned something about solar-powered landscape lights. They're pit-ee-ful! I spent fifteen whole dollars on the cutest little lantern, and I never saw such a puny excuse for a light in my whole borned days. A jar of lightning bugs would serve better. It's in an area that will be difficult to get power to, in order to install a regular light, so I thought I'd try this. Ha! My watch dial gives off more light. Oh, well, the little lantern is cute by day, so I guess it's okay. Sugarplum says hey! --Romeena

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20809: One of my favorites, "This field, this game: it's a part of our past, Ray. It reminds of us of all that once was good and it could be again."


April 13, 2004 - Msg 20810: Here, Hazel. Give me that broom, and go set a spell. I'll sweep. Maybe we could tie fluffy rags to the Plum's feet and let her chase her rubber hamburger for a while. That should sweep up a little bit of the dirt. --Romeena

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20811: Since we're trying to sweep the porch, this line from No Time for Sergeants seems like it fits...

Sgt. King: "I identified the remains.... 2 charred helmets and a handful of dust.
Will: "That's all it was! Dust! If I'd of known you'd think it was us, I would've swept it under the rug or sumptin!"

--Will Stockdale, P.L.O.

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20812: Goober: (on the phone) "Hello? Oh, howdy. Oh, I'd like to but I can't. I'm gona be helping the sheriff. It's an easy job, why don't you do it yourself? Just take the head off, clean out the intake ports and valve springs. Drain the crank case and fill it full of 40 weight. Aint nothin' to it. Ok. Goodby Alice!"
Andy: "Alice?"
Goober: "Yeah, sweet little old woman, I think she's a Quaker."
- Hazel

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20813: One of my favorites...

"Do you believe men are going to the moon someday?"
"Yes, in fact, I plan to go there myself."
"Boy, you already there!"

-- Will Stockdale, P.L.O.

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20814: Good heavens. There must have been a lot of dust on this porch!
- Hazel

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20815: Why, Will Stockdale! It's good to see you. Where have you been keeping yourself? --Romeena

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20816: Floyd: "It's just a haircut you know. It isn't a brain operation."
- Hazel

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20817: Been keeping myself busy with schoolwork.... in fact I should be working right now... a grad student's job is never done!

--Will Stockdale, P.L.O.

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20818: "No thanks, Leon."
- Hazel

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20819: But your education is worth every penny, Will!
- Hazel

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20820: Otis: "Go out Route 22, past Wainsboro, Medville, Thorndike, Hobson..."
Barn: "A little slower, please..."
Otis: "...through Virginia, Pennsylvania, Ohio..."
Barn: "He's makin' for Canada!"
Otis: "...back through West Virginia, Kentucky, Tennessee, into Mayberry on Route 10... to Elm Street...Four-One-One Elm Street."
- Hazel

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20821: I give up!
- Hazel

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20822: The last sweep came at 130 posts... Hazel, you were post 125... I assume it's based on file size, not # of posts, but still we should be pretty close! It's not time to give up now!

--Will Stockdale, P.L.O.

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20823: One more,
Billy Clanton: You're so drunk, you can't hit nothin'. In fact, you're probably seeing double.
Doc Holliday: I have two guns, one for each of ya.


April 13, 2004 - Msg 20824: Ok, Will, I'll keep trying!
Barn: "Those of us who chart the course of history, shall forever remain nameless".
- Hazel

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20825: Floyd: "I suppose one of your kin died. That's always a terrible blow...no? Well, whatever it was is strickly a mans personal business. Stock market, was it? No? did you win it on one of those game shows?"
- Hazel

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20826: Will, good one.
Since you did No Time for Sergeants how about one from The Ghost and Mr. Chicken.
Luther Heggs', "Calm? Do 'murder' and 'calm' go together? Calm and murder? Murder?"


April 13, 2004 - Msg 20827: "Sleep it off, Tiger." (Andy, to Barney) --Romeena

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20828: "Listen, you find compelsion nuts all over."
- Hazel

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20829: The ways of the creatures of the wild are many and wonderful.
- Hazel

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20830: How about the Incredible Mr. Limpet,
Henry: What if I told you I used to be a human being?
Ladyfish: I don't care how terrible your past was, Limpet.


April 13, 2004 - Msg 20831: Hazel, I love that one.

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20832:
Once burnt is a lesson learnt.
One mistake a better cake.
Once bit best forget.

- Hazel

April 13, 2004 - Msg 20833: "Go ahead, Opie. You can't hurt me, you see, because I'm braced!"