November 17, 2007 - Msg 58217: Mornin' Y'all! Boo,happy to hear the positive report on Sean.Prayers continue,friend. Oh,Bruce wasn't under a bandstand lately,was he? Watch out for them spiders!

Well,I got one of my inarculations yesterday-the cortisone for sciatica.( By the way Boo,rest does help,so I've been doing a lot more of that.)I already feel 95% better! They couldn't give me the flu shot along with the cortisone,so I have to wait til first week in Dec.My doctor is a kook! I mean that in a good way.He relocated his practice in a city about 30 miles from here over the summer.I found out when I opened the newspaper & saw an ad announcing his new location.When he came into the exam room yesterday,he said "You found me!" to which I replied that I saw his ad in the paper and I was like "Oh,no!"- and initially AGGRAVATED that he moved on me! He said " But wasn't that a nice picture of me?" We cracked up laughing! Oh,and he told me that the sciatica most likely flared up due to me bending over and picking up all those pecans I told y'all about.Yep,that's when it started acting up again,come to think of it. I told him that I picked up over 100 lbs. and made some money on them by selling them-he laughed and said "Yeah,and now you've got to pay my fee!" Like a said-a kook! Ha!

I promised y'all an update on my daughter's friend Kim.We just heard that her cervical cancer is contained -has NOT gone into lymph nodes.Thank God.She's having a rough time with radiation,depression,being forced to go back to her job as a Hospital Tech,etc.She is due to have some type of surgery after Christmas as well. Thank every one who has been praying for her-please continue.She is one of the sweetest young ladies I've ever known.

Oh,auh2o,I am a "Deep Southerner" with a fireplace-love it! Haven't fired it up yet though.

Y'all have a good Saturday.I'm off to check out Starr's photos!
possum under a rock

November 17, 2007 - Msg 58218: Hey, I don't feel THAT good! Why'd ya make me sweep??!!

possum again

November 17, 2007 - Msg 58219: Me again- I just had to pop back in and tell y'all that I just got an e-mail from a relative telling me about using Vicks on the soles of the feet to stop coughing!

Boy oh, boy,wait till I tell her that I already knew that and that I have an immense knowledge of that marvelous stuff in the little blue jar!

possum once more

November 17, 2007 - Msg 58220:

I have a fireplace, auh2o. I'm in south central Texas, and we get a few 'fireplace days' down here. My grandmother in Mississippi had a fireplace and they used it a lot. It gets colder where they lived, Jackson, than it does here; sometimes it snows. My dad's family is in Kentucky. Now it does get cold there! We fired up the fireplace last night and it was great. It was chilly and rainy outside, but not really cold. I just love a fireplace.

Happy weekend, everyone!


November 17, 2007 - Msg 58221:
oops.. Possum, I forgot to say how happy I was to learn Kim's cancer had not spread to the lymph nodes. That is wonderful news. I said a prayer of thanks and will continue to pray for her.


November 17, 2007 - Msg 58222: Morning Dears.
Possum, glad you are not walking as crooked as you were. Maybe you should let them nuts alone next year. Not worth getting hurt over. And quit sweeping with a bad back. That's what Boo is here for.:) Glad Kim's situation is not more severe than it is. Prayers for her spirit to be lifted.

Boo, that is encouraging news about Sean. He seems to be making good progress. He has been blessed with some good parents to raise him. Will your hubby have an aversion to bandstands now?

Romeena, Starr is just as pretty as can be. My goodness, she looks to be a handful for you. I imagine you two will have a long and wonderful life together.

Me-They, thank you for your apology, but no need to. I was not offeneded by your comments. I have heard it many times before. You are entitled to your opinions. As I stated, my Savior knows where my heart is, and is the one I am concerened about judgement from. I have recently been the recipient of much wonderful Christian service and fellowship from members of the L.D.S. faith. I find them to be some of the most faithful and devoted followers of Christ I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. They are not in agreement with some of the Creeds established in the 4th century but are very much in line with the teachings of the original Church that Christ established earth during his Ministry here on earth.
With that being said, I'm still unsure of who I like for President. I have really liked Rudy, but am hearing some serious rumblings that may be going public here in the near future that has me concerned. I am torn on the issue of abortion. I in no way am in favor of it from a personal level, and I know Rudy has expressed those same sentiments, but he does not believe the Federal Government should have the power to dictate that. I just am torn on this somewhat because I am in opposition to abortion, but I am in opposition to Government intrusion into lives. But at the same time I believe we as a society have an obligation to protect the innocent, and are there any more innocent than those who have been concieved and yet to be born? That is my challange here.
There is little that a President will have to do with this issue other than those appointed to the Supreme Court and Rudy has said clearly he would not seek out appointees who are pro-life or pro-choice, but rather those who are strict consti-tutionists (sp) which is very important to me. I believe the Consti-tution to be an inspired document and has to be protected and honored if we hope to keep this the greatest Country ever. (just my opinion)
With all that being said, if this all boils down to a final choice between Rudy and Hillary, Rudy will get my vote with no problem. It was mentioned the lesser of two evils, but I just don't see it that way. There is no one candidate out there who is going to see things on every issue the same as I do. I have to vote for one who comes closest to representing my views. To approach this from a standpoint of refusing to vote because no one is in complete agreement with my thinking on every issue of the day is to slap the face of every Patriot who has ever given his or her life to protect that freedom for me.

OK, Sorry about the book I just wrote. But I had some time on my hands and I have not posted much as of late so I have lots of making up to do. LOL

Love you guys more than I can say and appreciate your prayers and good thoughts for my Sweetheart and I.


November 17, 2007 - Msg 58223: Yes, good news about Kim, bless her heart. Hope the cortisone helps your back, Possum. You know, if I picked up 100lbs of pecans, I'd be paying for my funeral!

Auh2o, last night I was giving some thought to your question about fireplaces. Nearly every home that is built here in south texas has a fireplace. I had one in the home we sold and we will have a stone fireplace in the new house. A wood-burning one, not a gas one. My mom has a gas one and I get bored with it because it always looks just the same. I like the smell of the wood burning, too, and we have lots of wood to burn piled up out there. Like DES, said, we do have some fireplace days each year, but we like fires for the way they look and feel and smell (the coziness of a fire). They aren't usually built for heat down here. I always thought it interesting that when I was growing up and spending summers with my relatives in Michigan, nobody had a fireplace in their home. It got COLD up there all winter, but no fireplace. Also noticed that almost everyone in Michigan has a pool in the backyard. I don't mean the in-ground kind, but the big round ones that sit above ground. They don't get to use them long, but they have them, and down here where it's hot, you seldom see one in anyone's backyard. Maybe because the beach is close by. Of course, in Michigan they have the great lakes. I tried to swim in Lake Huron one summer and couldn't get in above the legs. Horribly cold!

Well, went back to sleep at 5am and slept until 9!! I haven't slept that long in ages. Sure felt good but now I have a headache...wonder why over sleeping leads to headaches?

Yesterday I sat out in the backyard with the kids and watched Knickers run around and we laughed our heads off at that rabbit! I couldn't believe the stunts he pulled. He is a small bunny and very spry. He seems to defy gravity the way he jumps straight up in the air and flips, then he puts his ears back and runs for all he's worth. I think we should have named him Earnest T, cause he's a nut! After the show he put on yesterday, we are now calling "Nutty Knickers"! What fun he is. I'm a bit concerned about how it will be when we get him moved out to the land because the fence is made of that wire with the big squares that he could slip right through. I want to be able to let him out to play but if he takes off running, none of us will catch him and there is brush all around the property. I hate to stick him in a hutch all the time. Whe we let him loose in the house, he leaves little droppings everywere! He isn't rained to the litter box, but sleeps in it. We keep him in the cage inside tha house most of the time.

Well, lots to do to get ready for the trip. I found out that we are going to have to take dad's weinie dog with us, ugh! He won't go without her because he is too worried about her. I would like to say that she is a sweet, docile dog, but she is senile or something and hated nearly everyone except the immediate family. She will be barking her head off most of the time so I am taking the Xanax that I've been saving! If I take enough of that, I won't care about the dog. Somebody find me some squeezin's to put in my suitcase, will ya?


November 17, 2007 - Msg 58224: Good morning, all. Well, Asa, I'm glad you wrote that book, and glad I read it. You have just put a couple of issues into the clearest terms I've heard in quite a while. Regarding the LDS church, like you I've known some Mormons in my many years, and in most cases have found them to be loving, kind people who voiced the basic beliefs of Christianity, just as I believe them to be. One exception was a man who was rather highly-placed in the church and he had some beliefs that I couldn't accept. Without going into detail, and I don't wish to open a discussion here, but I have the impression that the rank-and-file members of the church are simple Christians, and some of the hierarchy, as they move upward in the ranks, are led into "secrets" that are not shared with everyone else. I could be wrong, but that's what my husband and I were told by the gentleman I mentioned. He said true Mormons will "aspire to become more enlightened."
I had a nurse friend, a Mormon, who died a couple of years ago from cancer, and she gave a beautiful example of faith and acceptance of God's will. I could never, ever believe that she wasn't a Christian - she spoke of Christ daily, and reiterated her faith in Him to anyone who would listen.

As for voting, never in my wildest dreams (or nightmares) could I vote for Hillary, for a lot of reasons. I'm not thrilled with any of the candidates, but I definitely will vote, and will base my choice pretty much on the things you outlined, Asa. The fact is, we don't have a clear choice this time (do we ever?) so all we can do is pray and let God lead.

As for the abortion issue, legal or not, it's here. Drug trafficking is illegal, drug use is illegal, but we still have it. My husband used to say "You can't legislate morality" and he was right. Don't misunderstand, I'm not saying we should just cave in and offer abortion freely to all, I'm just saying we will never eliminate it. If a woman is determined, she will get it done. Therefore, while I would hope that we could have a president who is opposed to abortion, that hope has more to do with what his position tells me about the man himself, and less to do with the case for/against abortion itself.

Well, I don't know if any of that makes sense, but there you are. Gotta go feed this little white puffball that's dancing around my feet. She's such a little doll. Blessings, all! --Romeena

November 17, 2007 - Msg 58225: Hi, me again. Boo is right, most new homes in Texas have fireplaces, and many of the older ones as well. I have a huge stone fireplace, you could roast an ox in it, and when it was fired up and a good bed of coals built up, you could feel the radiant heat from it clear across the room a distance of about 20 feet. It draws beautifully, and there is not a hint of smudging on the stone above the firebox. It would heat up the entire living area, including the dining room and kitchen, and even into the office. Since the thermostat was in the same room, the furnace would shut down, and the bedrooms would get very cold. That was great! A warm room for socializing, a cold bedroom for sleeping - I love to sleep in a cold room, with lots of covers. We'd just let the fire die down by itself during the night, and along about dawn, it cool off enough in that room that the furnace would kick in, and the bedrooms would be warm when we got up. Perfect!

My husband was the fire-builder, and when he passed, I guess a couple of years went by without any fires. I finally started building some, but one night I went out to get wood, slipped on the icy driveway and fell. I thought I had broken my hip, the pain was so intense, and I figured I'd just lay out there and freeze to death, as it was about 25 degrees. In a few minutes I found I could get up, and made it into the house. Huge bruise next day, and I decided that was enough of that. I found a place that does the ceramic logs that look so real you can't believe they're not, and had them installed. There was already a gas line there, so it was easy to do. I do miss the fireplace smell, but it's nice to just light the thing and not have to drag in wood, all dirty and buggy.

Boo, I'm so glad Sean is doing better. Bless his heart, he sure has had his share of problems. As for the dog, check with your vet. You might be able to get something to give the dog to make her more mellow, instead of taking something yourself. Your dad wouldn't even have to know you were giving it to her. The dog might even enjoy the trip more that way, and certainly the people will!

Blessings, all! --Romeena

November 17, 2007 - Msg 58226: "it WOULD cool off enough" -- good grief! And I proof-read, too! --Romeena

November 17, 2007 - Msg 58227: Morning Family:
Stopping by to say a quick HI, and then off the finish cleaning. The college kid coming home for break, and the rest of the family stopping by. Going to be a busy week on this side of the porch. Chilly and damp this morning.
Gonna try to get the woodstove going to warm this place.
What's for lunch Spot? I'm too busy to stop and fix something.
Good to hear from ya Asa. Been thinking about ya. ~New Neighbor

November 17, 2007 - Msg 58228: Hey there Ro;
Hope I didn't rock on your toes. ~New Neighbor

November 17, 2007 - Msg 58229: Fireplace here and enough pyromania in me to love a fire. Wish TX had more fireplace weather to use it. Last night when I went out could smell oak burning...even thought about building a fire but it was 60 degrees. May have been some of your smoke DeS.

November 17, 2007 - Msg 58230: Hi, Ray. I know what you mean. Somehow it's hard to generate much enthusiasm for a fire when the grass is green, flowers are blooming, and it's 76 degrees out, which it is right now. One year at Christmas, the weather had been very cold, we had even had a dusting of snow a few days before, all the kids were coming in, and I had big plans. Roaring fire, carols around the tree, my dad reading the Christmas story from the Bible, all the happy traditions. Well, Christmas Eve the weather turned warm, and on Christmas morning it was 80 degrees. I was moping about my spoiled plans, and my husband fixed it. He turned on the a/c, pushed the thermostat way down and built a fire anyway! A little one, but a fire nevertheless. I don't know what my neighbors thought about smoke coming from our chimney in shirtsleeve and shorts weather, but there it was. We had a great day! --Romeena

November 17, 2007 - Msg 58231:

It might have been, Ray! I went out last night and it looked so cozy, the smoke coming out of the chimney.. the stars in the sky.. did I mention I love a fireplace? :-)


November 17, 2007 - Msg 58232:

Hey, Ro! Didn't see you there. Was checking at today and it's supposed to be chilly for Thanksgiving! Yippee! This will be the first time in three years it's been cool enough to have a fire on Thanksgiving. Now, about Christmas...


November 17, 2007 - Msg 58233: Hey Asa, we love you too, Buddy! Good to get a nice, long post from you. Thank you for your kind comments. When's the new grandbaby supposed to arrive??

Ro, I thought about something to give the dog, but a few years ago, my dad had a dog that was his best buddy and the dog would get so distraught during thunderstorms, that dad decided to try a doggie tranquilizer that the vet gave him and the dog had a stroke. Now, whether the med caused it or not, dad is convinced that it did, do I don't think we could convince him to try it on the weinie dog (although either result would be fine with me...he, just kidding).


November 17, 2007 - Msg 58234: oh, forgot...I don't want to say too much about LDS, but I worked with a woman who was and she had some very unusual beliefs, to put it mildly, that had no place in scripture. That's all I'm going to say...we have to be careful about preserving the integrity of the gospel as it's revealed in scripture and be aware of anything that opposes the inspired word of God. The Lord tells us not to add to it....just my feelings on the matter.


November 17, 2007 - Msg 58235:
Hey Folks

I didn't intend for the "fireplace question" (FIREGATE) as any type of slight to my Southern friends. It's great to see so many people enjoying a fire. I was just curious, my sister lives in Boa Raton, in south Florida, (they summer here to get out of the heat) and she had mentioned this past summer that live would never have a fireplace down there just because it doesn't get cold enough. Thanks for all the responses.

Boo-Wow, no fireplaces that you in Michigan, we have two here in our house, and most of the people in our little circle have them in their homes. It is a poor way to heat, at times, but the are nice an cozy.

Asa & Romeena- Politics is much more like poker than chess, have to play with the hand you're dealt. Well stated, I think, on the troubling question of abortion. Many people, an a lot of them right of center, believe that if the government says you cannot have an abortion then someday the government could also have the right, legally, to force people to have abortions. China anyone? I am opposed to abortion. Just food for thought.


November 17, 2007 - Msg 58236:
Ok, for those of you that don't speak gibberish, let me interpret.

Thanks for answering the fireplace question.

Asa & Romeena- I agree with both of you.

Boo-Wow, no fireplaces in Michigan.

Must proofread, must proofread, must proofread.


November 17, 2007 - Msg 58237:
Hey gang! Hope ya all are doing well.
TOM- very funny about paying the man! In this case the governor of Georgia appealed to "THE" Man!!! ha Good for him. If we had more polititians willing to do that, God would hear us and will heal our land.
Just think, when the Puritans first arrived here in the 1600s, and they signed the Mayflower Compact, it was to establish a Christian way of life, and way of governing things.
Lord, may we return to YOU and to those very early roots of this our land. Amen
I will be in and out until next weekend, so just wanted to get that in.
God Bless you all,
PS: I invited a person over at the rifleman site to join us, so ya all be nice now!! haha

November 17, 2007 - Msg 58238: Thanks MDC for the reminder. We get caught up in the everyday things, and forget the important things--like our roots and what was the intent of the great land. May the Lord remind us daily.
HAPPY THANKSGIVING EARLY!!- Not sure what the schedule will be with the family coming and going, the turkey needin' attention,and work. Somehow that nastly word(work) keeps coming up!
I'm thankful for--each and every friend on the porch. I appreciate everyone of you!! Like a family, we each have different personalities, likes and dislikes,interests and experiences, but at the end of a day find enjoyment having been a part of each others' lives.
Happy Thanksgiving- Millies family. We continue to pray for you.
~New Neighbor

November 17, 2007 - Msg 58239: My oldest son builds homes in Florida, a few in Orlando but most of them in the Mt. Dora area, about 30 miles north of Orlando. He puts a fireplace in every house. Admittedly, they're small, not intended for a huge roaring fire, but big enough to provide a cozy bit of ambiance. The homes are on the upscale side, most of them in gated communities. Some of the larger ones even have a fireplace in the master bedroom, but most don't. He has one in his own home, (not in the bedroom, just in the living area) and they do use it.

Now, what you won't find in Texas and probably not anywhere else in the South, is a basement. We just don't have them. In all my life here, I don't remember a single family member or friend or acquaintance who had a home with a basement. I wonder what causes that??

Do any of you fellow Southerners have basements, or know anyone who does? --Romeena

November 17, 2007 - Msg 58240: Gosh gang have I got to do some reading! off days from work I have just been working aroung the dog Rev you in ky?..been getting fed?..Asa you ok,hey mavis,ro,boo,lucy,NW,TOM and all...well hope I can get to sit a spell in just a bit..Big Maude you been feeding this bunch?..and by the way Im a hungry dog over this way...any left overs?...prayers to all..hey possum,hazel,auh20.horatio and all...back in a bit..I need FOOD!...SPOT

November 17, 2007 - Msg 58241: No basement, we hit water at 4 feet here. The only place I have ever seen a basement in Texas is at one of the big department stores in downtown San Antonio.


November 17, 2007 - Msg 58242: Hey,

Don't know if any one is around, but I sure have a heavy heart tonight. Not sure if I mentioned before that my mom is going through a severe depression. She'll be 80 next Sunday. My 53 yo brother lives with her. Hasn't had a steady job in years, was in prison a few years ago for drugs. Had his liscence taken away for multiple DUIs . Has some serious peronality issues. Actually I think he's either a sociopath, drug addict or mentally ill or all three. Anyway, this year for Thanksgiving my mom says it is too much for me and my brood to stay at her house. She just wants to be alone. So we are staying at my sister's an hour away. We'll visit her a couple of days, but not stay. To make a long story short, would those of you who pray, join me in praying for a peaceful time. Not always possible with my brother. Actually, I'm praying for him to disappear. I think he's the main cause of my mother's problems. Isn't that a terrible thing to say. :( Anyway, he called me tonight on my cell phone. He's a smooth talker, quoting Bible verses to me, saying, "I forgive you for what you've done to me". What have I done???? Anyway, that's my depressing saga. I probably haven't made much sense. Just wanted some fellow believers to join with me in prayer.



November 17, 2007 - Msg 58243: So sorry your heart is heavy, Opiemom, and thank you for sharing your need and allowing us to join you in prayer. Sounds like a very difficult situation. Hope your holiday is much better than you expect and my God's peace go with you.


PS-try to get some good sleep and things might look a little better in the morning...

November 17, 2007 - Msg 58244: I'm sorry...I meant to sign "Boo" and signed my real name! oops.


November 17, 2007 - Msg 58245: Oh, I have a prayer request also. I mentioned earlier that Bruce has a brown recluse bite and is on antibiotics, but today he has this area below the bite that is swollen, read and hot to the touch, and he has a fever. I called the doc and he said the antibiotics should take care of it but to let him know if it gets any bigger. I am concerned because I am supposed to go out of town on Monday. Please pray that the antibiotics do their job and he gets better tomorrow. Thanks,


November 17, 2007 - Msg 58246: My goodness! A brown recluse bite? He'll definitely want to keep close watch on that thing - it may need to be excised, as the venom is cytotoxic and diminishes very slowly, it just keeps working for quite a while.

Opiemom, what you said regarding your brother is not terrible at all. It's reasonable, sensible and completely understandable considering what he has put everyone through. Unfortunately, mothers being what we are, if he does disappear, your mom will only worry herself sick about him. However, that would still give everyone else some relief, and possibly make day-to-day life a bit easier for your mom in spite of herself. From your brief description, I'd say he is indeed a sociopath - the ploy about "forgiving" you was intended to make you feel guilty, make you feel sorry for him, and to curry a bit of favor for himself. In his mind, he probably does feel like you've wronged him - you haven't bowed down to him, fed him, clothed him and carried him around on a pillow. You allowed the law to take the proper course and imprison him - most likely, in his mind you should have intervened and made it all go away. If he's truly a sociopath, he has no concept of any wrongdoing on his own part, and anything that hasn't served his purposes was an insult and a slight. Know this, dear. There is nothing you can do to change him, and trying to pacify him is an endless treadmill. He's like an overgrown toddler - smart, self-centered, but not wise. Very dangerous. Prayers for you and what sounds like it will be a very tense holiday.

Well, I'm off to bed, to try to sleep, if this little two and a half pound dynamo will allow it. I can't believe anything that small can be so busy. --Romeena

November 17, 2007 - Msg 58247:
OPiemom-It's about 12:40 am here and I'm having a hard time sleeping tonight so I thought I'd sit on the porch for a while. Just read your post, sending up heartfelt prayers for ya. Like Boo said, hoping your holiday is much better than you expect. And, along the same line as Romeena, try not to let him win, making you feel guilty, have some joy in spite of him.


November 18, 2007 - Msg 58248: Morning friends. Good Sabbath to you all.

Opiemom, Your family will be in my prayers, especially your Mom. We have an extended family member who sounds much like your brother, just not quite as old. He is 30, and not had as much trouble with the law, but my feelings are it's just a matter of time. He refuses to work, and the family, after years of trying to help him, refuse to enable him any longer. The hope is this will force him to get his act together. So I some of what you speak on.
What is a sociopath anyway? Is that a real condition or just kind of a catch-all phrase for those who have some issues? I am really serious about this, and is there a means to identify and treat it?

Boo, sure do hope Bruce's bite is not what your thinking it is. Best keep an eye on it. I guess we will never get the bandstand rebuilt now!

We all have basements here, even though the water table is somewhat high. I have one, but it's mostly unfinished. I used to not like them cause they are dark and smelly, but new construction codes require all the windows be big enough for egress in case of fire so large window wells are required to accomadate the large windows. This has resulted in a much brighter and more inviting space.
We also have a fireplace but because we are at a much higher alti-tude, (5,000 ft)and because we are surrounded by huge mountains we live in a bowl like valley and when we get a winter time high pressure over us it's like putting a lid on that bowl. We end up with an inversion and the air can get pretty bad. So they will issue "no burn days" where it is agin the law to use a fireplace. So we have a gas log in ours. Gives all the ambiance without all the work and burns much cleaner.

New Neighbor, please know that Merideth is in our prayers as is the rest of your family. I pray they will find what's going on with her and be able to treat it.

Auh2o, what's going on up your way? You gotten much snow yet? It was 65 here yesterday, very odd for this time of year, but a storm is due in on Tuesday and is gonna drop things by 20 degree's. We had a few snowstorms back in early October or maybe even September but it has been dry and warm since.

Romeena, you are such a kind and caring woman. I just love reading your posts. You bring so much wisdom and joy to the porch, and yet can speak on things of a touchy subject in a down home manner without offending. I'm proud to call you friend.
Boy, am I getting mushy or what?

Prayers to all.


November 18, 2007 - Msg 58249: Mornin' Asa, I did a little search for "sociopath" and here is some of the info I found:

Another term for sociopath, is "Antisocial Personality Disorder" and is characterized by:
1) Failure to conform to social norms with respect to lawful behaviours as indicated by repeated acts that are grounds for arrest.
2) Deceitfulness; lying, aliases, conning others for profit.
3) Impulsivity or failure to plan ahead.
4) Irritability and agressiveness; physical fighting or assault.
5) Reckless disregard for the safety of others or self.
6) Consistent irresponsibility, as indicated by boing indiffernt to or rationalizing having hurt, mistreated, or stolen from others.

Other symptoms may be:
violates rights of others
substance abuse
inability to tlerate boredom
lack of remorse
superficial charm
extreme sense of entitlement
inability to make or keep friends (good ones, anyway_


November 18, 2007 - Msg 58250: Wow, that describes this guy pretty good Boo. Thanks. Is there any mention of any treatment for this?


November 18, 2007 - Msg 58251: Good morning, all. Asa, you are too kind. I'll have another bowl of that mush, please and thank you. (teehee) Yes, "sociopath" is a real condition - here are a few definitions straight from a person, as a psychopathic personality, whose behavior is antisocial and who lacks a sense of moral responsibility or social conscience. Someone whose social behavior is extremely abnormal. Sociopaths are interested only in their personal needs and desires, without concern for the effects of their behavior on others. So there you have it. The disorder can manifest in a wide range of degrees of severity, from the grown man who refuses to work and expects to be taken care of, right on through to serial killers. In the lesser degrees, it's hard to distinguish between a true sociopath and just a lazy, spoiled lout who needs a kick in the pants to get him going. Prisons are full of sociopaths. Very few prisoners will tell you they deserved what they got - some, perhaps, but not many. Most will rant and rail to their literal dying day that they got a bum deal, they're being persecuted, etc. One recently-executed killer here in Texas admitted his deed, but didn't think he should be punished because his victim, according to him, deserved it. These people can be identified even in childhood, if someone is paying attention. They'll often be the kid who abuses small animals, or beats up on smaller children. I'm not talking about the little kid who pulls the cat's tail, or normal kids' squabbles, I mean willful cruelty. They have no concern for the pain they inflict, sometimes even enjoying it. When this disorder is identified in childhood, however, I'm not sure just what, if anything, can be done to correct it. They just don't seem to possess the gene that allows them to see things from any perspective but their own, and their own is all that matters to them.

Well, that's probably more than you asked for, but that's a sociopath as I understand it. Prayers for Mrs. Asa, and again, thank you for the kind words. I'm very proud to be your friend. --Romeena

November 18, 2007 - Msg 58252: Wow, Boo, you covered it quite thoroughly! Actually, as I was reading your post, and re-reading my own, I realized we were describing a cousin of mine. He's 70, and still behaves like he did when he was 16, and is pretty much not welcome anywhere in the family. He owes everyone money, including me, though that's an indirect debt. He owed my father several thousand, which should have been paid to my dad's estate when he died, but of course, never was. He now denies the debt, in spite of the fact that I have a signed note he gave my dad. Actually, I don't even know where he is now, haven't seen him in several years. He's pretty pitiful, really. --Romeena

November 18, 2007 - Msg 58253: Happy Sunday to all..prayers all around ...lets have a covered dish late lunch...I will bring the fried chicken...SPOT

November 18, 2007 - Msg 58254:
Boo- in the Phx paper the other day, there was an article about 2 firman who thought they got brown recluse bites but it ended up being MRSA!!
Please have him double check with the doctor and insist on a culture.
Sorry to be so emphatic with your trip coming up, but it could be more than a bite.!!

November 18, 2007 - Msg 58255: that's FIREMEN. mdc

November 18, 2007 - Msg 58256: Good afternoon, everyone. A prayer request - just got word that the pre-school-age grandson of some church members was running through the parking lot of another church this morning, somehow fell beneath a moving car and was dragged some distance. He has some serious head injuries, and is in surgery at this moment. There are other injuries as well, but the focus is on the brain swelling and trauma right now. Family is distraught, of course. Please pray.

Looking back at my post regarding my cousin, I guess it sounds like I wouldn't allow him in my home. That's not true, and I suppose it's not true of any other family members. We would not make an effort to invite him, but we would not turn him away if he showed up, with the exception of one brother. His other brother and his sister are pretty much through with him, but would feed him if he showed up hungry. My cousin has pretty much abused them all, and worn out his welcome, so to speak. His mother knew he had problems, and covered for him, made excuses for him, tried to force him on everyone as long as she lived, bless her little heart. He was her firstborn, and she loved him, of course. Mothers are like that. Toward the end of her life, he moved in with her, supposedly to take care of her, but would leave her alone for days at a time. He also had his hand in the till, siphoning money away from her, until his sister caught him. It appeared that he had filched several thousand dollars from her assets. He was totally unrepentant, stating "she owes me". For what, he never could explain. So, Asa, in my book, that's a sociopath. He still thinks everyone in the family has wronged him. --Romeena

November 18, 2007 - Msg 58257: Sounds like a real nice guy.

So sad about the little boy. Prayers for him and his family, and the church family...especially the individual who ran over the boy. I saw firsthand how that can effect someone recently when the little 2 yr old was killed here. That is one of my fears about my own church. We have a poorly lit parking lot that I have complained about before and on Wed nights, kids are running around out there in the dark, unattended. I have always been fearful that one of these days something might happen. Reading about his little boys is spurring me on to greater action. I will talk to the head of the building and grounds committe tonight!


November 18, 2007 - Msg 58258: I was thinking about it, and I think that while the building and ground committee can light up the parking lot, there is still the problem of parents who don't watch over their children well enough. It seems like I am constantly yelling at kids who are running around in the parking lot. It's so dangerous. When Sean was about 4, he was walking through the parking lot with Bruce, and Bruce was even holding his hand. They were walking behind a parked car that started backing up. The woman didn't look back, she just started out and her car hit Sean and knocked him off his feet. Luckily Bruce had his hand and was able to pull him out just before one of the tires got him. I have noticed many drivers driving reclessly in parking lots. Just a thought....we all need to be more careful because it is so hard to see the little ones.


November 18, 2007 - Msg 58259: MDC, don't think Bruce has MRSA. The antibiotics seem to be working and the bite looks great today, so does the red area below the knee. Thanks for mentioning it, though.


November 18, 2007 - Msg 58260: Hey, Boo. While lights on the parking lot are certainly important, nothing takes the place of parental responsibility, and people driving more carefully. Actually, the accident I mentioned took place this morning, in broad daylight. I'm not sure just how it occurred. Most definitely, parents need to know where their kids are and what they're doing at all times, and even then things can happen, like it did with Sean. Who would have dreamed? --Romeena

November 18, 2007 - Msg 58261:
Opiemom, I'm so sorry to hear about your family problems. I pray that your mom comes out of her depression soon and that your family enjoys a happy Thanksgiving.

Romeena, praying hard for that poor little boy. Please keep us posted.

Ro, the only basement I've ever seen down here was in my friend Ray's house in New Braunfels. The house was built in the 'teens or '20s and was a really great old house. I'd love to go in it again but Ray died 31 years ago and his mom is gone, too.

auh20, I didn't take your fireplace question in any negative way atall. :-) Ours is a brick behemoth with an 11' tall, 7' wide chimney and a 15' long hearth. People who visit seem to like it, but it's a bit much, imho. The man who was the builder for this subdivision had this house built for himself and went a bit overboard. Some of the add-ons, like the bay winders and garden winder were great ideas, but he went a little crazy on the fireplace. lol One of these days it's going to get a serious facelift.

Boo, I hope Bruce continues recovering well from that spider bite. My friend had terrible problems from a brown recluse bite.


November 18, 2007 - Msg 58262: Hey, Dež. My fireplace is a monster also, though not quite in those proportions. It's about 10' tall, the face is about 7' wide, but the hearth is only about 9' wide, raised 16" from the floor, and is about 16" deep. It's all stone, with a rough cedar mantle board that's 4 feet long. It's a corner placement, and the room it's in is about 18x23 feet, so it's proportional.

Incidentally, the crusty, crotchety old fellow who built it educated me on fireplace terminology. The entire face of the fireplace is the mantle, and the ledge or shelf on the mantle is called the mantle board, or mantle piece.

His name was Doc, he was about as big around as a coatrack, but strong. Even so, he was ill, had retired, but came back to build my fireplace when my dad was building this house, because as he told me "Your daddy was always good to me." He wasn't happy with my presence while he was working, declared that women had no business on a construction site, but tolerated me.

My brother, a lifelong rockhound, had given me a box of unusual and beautiful stones, some with quartz crystal and iron pyrite running through them, and I wanted them incorporated into the fireplace. Doc griped and complained, told me he didn't have time to be picking out "pretty rocks", but I kept quiet, didn't say a word, and of course, he did it. Mine was the last fireplace he built, as he passed away about three months later.

I've always sort of cherished the fireplace, and after 34 years, it's still standing solid and strong. As I've said before, it draws like no other I've seen, and it's because Doc knew what he was doing when he built it. The exterior chimney is tall enough, the proportion of the size of the flue to the size and depth of the firebox is perfect, and there has never been a hint of smoke or smudge on the mantle.

A chimneysweep we hired to clean it when it was about fifteen years old just couldn't believe it. When my husband was living, we had fires almost every night in the winter, so the sweep said it would have at least an inch of soot built up, but he swept up less than a cupful after he cleaned it. He said when a fireplace draws properly, that's how it is, but it's very rare to find one that actually does draw right.

Well, how I do run on! Can you tell I like my fireplace?? Well, I may have to go in to work at 11, so guess I'd better get off this keyboard and get my kitchen cleaned up. I made some tomato basil soup and it was gooood! Blessings, everyone! --Romeena

November 18, 2007 - Msg 58263: Prayers Boo..hey Romeena..Asa.hazel...gosh the kids have been over all day...had a ball...I burn wood here a wood burning stove with a blower...24000 BTU...heats the whole house good enough for me! to get more wood cut up...hey Des,auh20...any hungry...well Jimmy J won the cup title!...good deal..he is a class act...goober check in K?...Mavis,TOM,Rev...hello!...back in a bit...SPOT

November 18, 2007 - Msg 58264: Hey guys, Thanks for the support. One of the main things to pray for is that i"ll keep my mouth shut. That is the best. Don't play into his comments.

Oh, fireplaces. When we lived inMichigan I used our fireplace almost every day in the winter. HEre in SC, I think we've used it 3 or 4 times. It gets our room so hot and then I have to clean it out. Although I do love a fire in a fireplace.

Here's a couple of funny fireplace stories. When we moved to SC from Mi 7 years ago, we moved the day after Thanksgiving. So on Thanksgiving everything was boxed up. We had turkey hotdogs over the fire in the fireplace. The pictures are great. Our children number just 4 then and were 7, 6, 4 and almost 2.

Here's a funny one. My sister in Ga got a gas fireplace when she remarried. She was showing us how it worked. Well when she flipped the switch that lit it, my oldest then 5 said, "Wow, it sure takes Daddy a lot longer than that!" We all though that was soooo funny.

Well, it is a little nippy here. How about some hot chocolate and marshmallows all around?

November 18, 2007 - Msg 58265: Oops Mgs 58264 was me,Opiemom

November 18, 2007 - Msg 58266: Opiemom, you're absolutely right. He'll likely make comments and try to get a rise out of you, but don't do it. Silence is best, of course, but sometimes the situation doesn't permit that. You can't just stand there and not respond when addressed directly. Just try to keep your answers as non-confrontational as you can. Some good responses (learned from my mother, who was a master at the art) are:
1. You could be right. (This is my favorite, it doesn't imply agreement with some outrageous statement, but it avoids argument.)
2. Why do you ask?
3. Do you really think that? How interesting!
4. I'm sure you know more about that than I do.
5. Let me think about it and we'll talk more later.

Just some little verbal dodges to get you out of a corner, maybe. They won't always work, but they often do.

With the cousin I mentioned earlier, I learned that when he was acting a fool, as he often does, just silence and a long, cool stare would throw him off. While sociopaths don't really care what anyone thinks about them, they still like to fantasize that everyone admires them, and when they can't tell what you're thinking, it bothers them just a little bit.

My cousin has a tendency to get a bit free with his hands with female relatives, and tries to just laugh it off when the woman objects, saying he was just being "family affectionate". Over the years, I've slapped him several times. Well, he had the nerve to try it again one afternoon, not knowing my husband had just walked into the room. Dale calmly got him by the shirt front, lifted him off his feet and carried him a few feet away, to get out of earshot of his mother. There he informed him that if he ever did that again, he would find himself on his back, and likely wouldn't get up for a couple of hours, if at all. No laughter that time, and it never happened again. Sociopaths do have a sense of self-preservation. We learned later, though, that he told everyone in the family that Dale had a "nasty temper". Of course, everyone knew what had happened, and just laughed at him. Oh, I could tell you some tales about big Dale and how he handled people who got out of line. The gentlest of men, he had his limits.

Just got word that I have the night off, don't have to go in at 11. Yay!! Starr won't have to be alone tonight, bless her little heart. Blessings, all! --Romeena

November 19, 2007 - Msg 58267: Ro, poor Doc, your fireplace killed him...heehee...sorry couldn't resist. Very sweet story and really makes the fireplace priceless, doesn't it?

Well, I am leaving for New Mexico. I think Bruce is fine, just some swelling and soreness in his lower extremities. No fever or anything. Please pray that he will be fine while I'm gone.

Hapyy Thanksgiving to all of my friends on the porch!


November 19, 2007 - Msg 58268:
Morning Porch

Asa-We have a bit of snow here about 5 inches on the ground but it's so they say it's gonna warm-up (relatively speaking of course) mid week to about 50. I do recall seeing that you folks got some snow in September, we had the A.C. a few times then. Your neck of the woods always gets the snow first, seems like you guys start and we finish it. It is great to see ya a bit more often buddy.

~Des~ & Romeena Those are some mighty fine fireplaces ya'll got there. I don't even know the dimensions of either of ours, needless to say, though they both are somewhat smaller. haha

Opiemom-That's a cute fireplace story.

Boo-Enjoy your trip.

Miss Daisy: Hoke?
Hoke : Yes'm.

Miss Daisy: You're my best friend.
Hoke : No, go on Miss Daisy.

Miss Daisy : No, really, you are...
Miss Daisy: You are.
Hoke : Yes'm.


November 19, 2007 - Msg 58269:
I just put the turkey down to thaw and am looking forward to my Thanksgiving day. My daughter is going to Arizona with her roomies.
I have "Mr Smith Goes To Washington " all set to go and I am doing something differnt this year.
I found a great turkey sandwich ---It will also give me an excuse to make some homemade cranberry sauce. My reletives treat my homemade cranberry sauce as if it were Aunt Bee's Pickles:)
Oh well--this sandwich has a sauce that goes with it--Iam going to try to make it up
Have a Happy Thanks giving All.

November 19, 2007 - Msg 58270:

Ro, I loved your fireplace story. Doc sounds like a skilled craftsman and a teddy bear to boot. Your fireplace sounds absolutely wonderful. Ours sound almost identical in proportion, only mine is unfortunately not stone; it's all brick, including a graduated 4-step mantle. (I'd MUCH rather have wood.) The hearth is also raised 16" and is 16" deep. If I didn't know better, I'd wonder if we had the same builder. LOL I also know what you mean about the "draw." This thing is almost like turning on a whole house fan, which this guy wisely also had put in.

I would be thrilled if mine were in a corner like yours. It was actually supposed to be, but this guy took out a wall that was in the original floor plan and made the living room 16'x30'. Nice size, but he put the fireplace on the SIDE, which really eats into the room. Oh well, it heats the place and is cozy as all get-out, so I can't complain. :-) When we went house hunting, the one thing we agreed on was that we wouldn't even look at one that didn't have a fireplace. And boy did we get one. LOL That's become a joke between us: Be careful what you ask for. :-)

Opiemom, loved your 5-year-old's comment about 'Daddy taking longer' to start a fire. Aren't kids a hoot?

Safe travels, Boo. Hope you have a great time in New Mexico. Can you believe we're right 'next door' and I've never been? Flown over it a few times, but that doesn't count! Glad Bruce is getting better, and wishing you a Happy Thanksgiving.


November 19, 2007 - Msg 58271: Hi everyone,Foggy and damp here this morning.
Boo,have a safe trip.
Ro,have a good night off.
Opiemom,hope you holiday goes smoothly.
Spot what's for lunch?
AHappy nut,sometimes a quiet holiday can be fun.
Asa,hope the Mrs is doing better.
Auh2o,wishing for snow here,maybe on Wednesday?
We don't have a fireplace,we have a cornburner,I bring in my porch rockers and we sit and watch the flames,very cozy and warm,no wood cutting is a nice thing. Well,I do need to clean the stove so better get to it.You all take care.
Peace Dr P

November 19, 2007 - Msg 58272: Lunch time!..Pizza Hut on Dr wings too..well im on the run..getting Christmas dec"s down out of the attic!...SPOT